E218: Why You Suffer—and How to Let It Go
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What causes psychological suffering and how is it described?
Mm. Chagrida, Jamastris. It's not difficult. To understand what compassion is. People suffer. People suffer. Not just in war zones and not just because of detention centers or financial problems. People suffer. Yes, there's degrees of suffering. But in general People suffer, they worry about things, they have anxieties, they have fears. They suffer. And You have to get a little bit out of that. To understand what compassion is. Compassion is you look at the suffering. It's not that you feel sorry, it's not sympathy. Compassion is not sympathy. Compassion is an understanding. That you don't have to suffer. But you are suffering. That creates compassion. There is a way out. Can't make you ticket. Person can't make another person not suffer.
But when you look at somebody who's suffering And you realize There's a way that they don't have to suffer. It's a lack of understanding, a lack of feeling. I always realize the word ignorance means ignorance. They're ignoring the truth, but they can't see the truth. Why? Because they're too lost in their suffering. So compassion is a very beautiful thing. It doesn't really try to change somebody. It just understands so deeply. That it creates this opening. It's full of pain, but a full of deep opening. in the heart of the person that experiences compassion. More so because they know the person does not have to suffer. Now what does it mean you don't have to suffer? There are many different levels of that. Let's start okay.
Start with war zones and people dying and Families were being killed and Kidnapped him. That's Very hard not to suffer when that stuff's going on. It's possible. When I finish we're gonna talk about it. It is possible not to suffer. Period. No matter what's going on, it's possible not to suffer. But that's extremely deep. But that's not where most of suffering is. Most of suffering isn't even physiological. Most of suffering is psychological. You just worry, you have anxieties, you you're uptight and and you have things you want to be a certain way and they're not that way and it makes you suffer. You have things you're afraid that will be a way you don't want them to be and it makes you suffer. It's this psychological suffering is all pervasive and everybody's got it.
Doesn't matter how much money you have, doesn't matter male or female, doesn't matter old or young. It goes on in there. And that's the one that it is more reasonable. for people to learn that they don't have to suffer. You start with why are you suffering? Well, let's analyze it, okay? Do you all suffer for exactly the same reason all the time? Even you. And do you suffer the same reason other people do? Or is it kinda like a personal thing, suffering? You suffer because this happened. You suffer because that didn't happen. You suffer because this person said this. You suffer because this person didn't say this. You suffer because you have what you thought the person was saying that they might not have said.
So you're suffering trying to figure out whether they said it or not. But the person next to you is not suffering about that. They're suffering about what they're doing. So the first thing you do to understand suffering is pervasive, it's all pervasive, but it's not universal in its cause. It is very personal in its cause. First of all, do you all agree? Do you understand that? That which makes you suffer, she couldn't care less. And and it's just like You have to understand, if you want to understand suffering, understand what's going on, you have to start with the truth. The truth is your suffering is different than everybody else's. And your suffering very likely yesterday was different than it will be today.
It's a constantly changing thing and it absolutely is not the same. Really with any two people? So What's it all about? You take a look at it and say, Well, why if it's that personal? What's causing it? And you understand, and we talk about this all the time, but as it's the foundation of understanding life and suffering in people, is You suffer. When you want things to be a certain way and they're not.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What causes psychological suffering and how is it described?
0:01–6:07
2
How does the speaker define compassion versus sympathy?
6:07–11:54
3
Why is wanting the outside world to match our preferences a source of suffering?
11:54–18:39
4
How do personal preferences and past experiences shape our perception of reality?
18:39–23:57
5
What is the role of inner work versus trying to change the outside world?
23:57–30:06
6
How can we practice letting go of stored patterns and release pain?
30:06–34:56
7
What steps does the speaker suggest for transforming suffering into peace?
34:56–40:39
8
How does the episode conclude on freedom and living without suffering?
40:39–47:31