Insights to Help High Achieving Women Lessen Frustration & Improve Connection-Jessie Mahoney
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What is the purpose of the Neurodiverse Love Podcast and who is the host?
Welcome to the Neurodiverse Love Podcast. I'm Mona Kay and I was married for 30 years and in that relationship for 32. We didn't find out that we were a neurodiverse couple until our 29th year of marriage. I've been divorced since twenty eighteen and together we have an amazing adult daughter who is thriving and doing fantastic. My hope is that as you navigate your relationship, That the information shared in this podcast will help you better understand the strengths, differences, and challenges you may have in your mixed neurotype relationship. If you would like to learn more about the resources I have available, I hope you will also check out my website at neurodiverseelove.com. And I also hope you will subscribe to the podcast and let me know what you like about each episode.
Thank you so much for listening to the Neurodiverse Love Podcast. Welcome, Dr.
How does Dr. Jessie Mahoney describe her personal journey into a neurodiverse marriage?
Jesse Mahoney. It's really good to see you and thank you so much for joining us at the Neurodiverse Love Conference.
Thank you for having me.
Yeah. I'm excited to hear your presentation today because we're gonna be talking about something that I don't think I've ever really talked about on the neurodiverse love podcast. And it's helping like high achieving professional women who are in neurodiverse relationships. understand the dynamics of what's going on or how this connection happens. So I'm going to turn it over to you, but I'm going to stay here so I can ask questions and maybe give my own thoughts as you share your life experiences and your expertise.
Thank you so much. And I uh am just gonna jump in. And this topic is near and dear to my own heart because I am one of those high achieving women who found herself in a relationship with someone who was neurodivergent and I didn't know it as most people who find themselves in that situation. Um End up and I've figured this out actually about maybe twenty-two years into my marriage. I'm about almost thirty-two years into my marriage. And We actually had this funny conversation. So I've just realized that I'm we are 40 years into our relationship. And so this is something I didn't know for probably 30 years of my relationship. And um for Those of you listening, I am a pediatrician and um I also coach women, mostly women physicians, but essentially high achieving women who are, as I say, successful on the surface but struggling underneath.
So I I come at this from a personal perspective, but also a professional perspective, because I have discovered that I'm not the only high achieving woman who has been in this situation and who didn't know it. And so I've thought a lot about how we end up here. And so I want to talk about that.
Why do high‑achieving professional women often attract neurodivergent partners?
And I also want to talk about the thing that causes us the most pain once we've discovered that we're here and try why why is this so frustrating to us and where are we making it harder on ourselves? And then a couple of things we can hopefully do to make it not as hard because of course I don't just want to bring up the negatives of how we ended up here. And So I think that really looking at the the dynamics of the situation and the reasons that it actually works in many ways. I think many of us we are experts knowing why all of this doesn't work. But um there is so much here that actually is why it works and it's how we ended up here. So I like to say that um You know, we are actually like puzzle pieces if you think about it that way.
And many we have many complementary strengths. And so high achieving women and neurodiverse men actually fit together well in many ways, even though we feel like it's dynamite and maybe we don't. So these complementary strings are Um Our neurodivergent partners tend to have be quite creative. They tend to be happy to be the supporting actor. They tend to be happy to have um be very focused on things and have lots of things they can focus on while we're out being high achieving and focusing on our other things. And they tend to bring unique problem solving skills, which we might need help with. Um, and I know for me, um, really recognizing that we have these complementary strengths has been really helpful.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is the purpose of the Neurodiverse Love Podcast and who is the host?
0:00–0:57
2
How does Dr. Jessie Mahoney describe her personal journey into a neurodiverse marriage?
0:57–3:04
3
Why do high‑achieving professional women often attract neurodivergent partners?
3:04–7:58
4
What complementary strengths do neurodivergent men bring to a relationship with high‑achieving women?
7:58–14:33
5
What is the hidden pain point that creates frustration for high‑achieving women in neurodiverse relationships?
14:33–19:23
6
How can shifting from a victim mindset to acceptance reduce conflict and increase harmony?
19:23–25:06
7
What practical steps (coaching, mindfulness, support groups) can high‑achieving women take to improve their neurodiverse partnership?
25:06–29:40
8
How can listeners connect with Dr. Jessie Mahoney and access her resources?
29:40–30:13
Speakers
1 identifiedMore from Neurodiverse Love with Mona Kay, MSW, Ph.D.
Lessons Learned & Lived Experiences: Mona’s Final Solo Episode
Improving Regulation & Communication-Jill Corvelli, Daniel Dashnaw, Barbara Grant & Jessie Mahoney
How is Neurodivergence Impacting Your Relationship?-Karen Doherty
Could I Really Be Autistic? Your First Steps to Self Discovery-Sarah Hendrickx
Imposter Syndrome, RSD, PDA & More-Panel Presentation from 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference
Creating Consensual Reality in Your Neurodiverse Relationship-Margaret Cocharan