The Joys of Being Autistic: Finding Self-Love -Jackie Schuld
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What is the purpose of this episode and who are the hosts?
Welcome to the Neurodiverse Love Podcast. I'm Mona Kay and I was married for 30 years and in that relationship for 32. We didn't find out that we were a neurodiverse couple until our 29th year of marriage. I've been divorced since 2018 and together we have an amazing adult daughter who is thriving and doing fantastic. My hope is that as you navigate your relationship, But the information shared in this podcast will help you better understand the strengths, differences, and challenges you may have in your mixed neurotype relationship. If you would like to learn more about the resources I have available, I hope you will also check out my website at neurodiverse love dot com. And I also hope you will subscribe to the podcast and let me know what you like about each episode.
Thank you so much for listening to the Neurodiverse Love Podcast. Hi, Jackie. It's so good to see you. And we did a workshop together. I really enjoy that. And it was great having you on the podcast. I'm glad you're here today.
Yes, thank you. I'm happy to be here.
Yeah. So today we're going to be talking about the joys of being autistic. And you are going to share some of your experiences and some of the things that I think you do to help others who are on that journey, right? Yes. So we're going to start with the first question that I'd like to ask you. And that's why did you decide to do a presentation on the joys of being autistic?
Well When you announced this conference and instead of you know narrow diverse love. I thought about Um my own relationships and where love begins and Loving myself and understanding myself and meeting my own needs has been So Pivotal in helping my relationships flourish. And meaning when I do those things when I for myself that keep me grounded, happy, connected, peaceful, then I show up in my relationships that way. Uh more often we'll say, not that all the time. None of us are perfect, right? Yeah, let's be realistic. When I'm meeting my own needs, I'm not, you know, in a frenzied dysregulated state and that way I'm more able to connect with people um in the way that I want to.
Yeah. So tell me a little bit about what you do, because I'd really like to know how do you keep yourself regulated? How do you keep yourself grounded? And I know you just recently got married. You know, that's a major change for somebody that's neurodivergent, let alone somebody that's any other, you know, um, any other wired brain in the in the world, right? Yes. You know, that's a major change. You know, two people that are bringing their lives together. How do you keep yourself regulated? How do you keep yourself in a place of joy?
Yes. Um I'd really Kind of answer this in two parts. One I'm I'm a lead identified autistic, so Not When I finally found that out, then I was able to start examining my life in terms of. Okay, what provides me energy, what drains me? And instead of fighting those things, just accepting that about myself and saying, Okay, if you really need a nap, that's okay. So I did all that, was working on those kinds of personal things, such as Essentially what are the practices that keep me grounded for the day. So for me, that's things like I like to wake up and have some open time to journal and to really just be with myself. So I'm start the day regulated and grounded. And then you know, in the act, then I'm doing my work and other things going out about.
And then at the end of the day also provide myself that cushion time to Sometimes it's recover from you know, the sensory overwhelm or all the things of the day or Uh just time to reground essentially. But what I'm trying to get to, sorry, is When I got married. And m moved in with my husband, I Suddenly realized I had a whole other set of needs I didn't know I had. Like what,
Jackie? Like
what? Well, like for instance, like I mentioned, the the time in the evening to wind down when suddenly my husband was there all the time. I couldn't wind down in the same way.
Right.
Where, you know, he's wanting To connect and be loving. You know, it's a it was a positive thing that he was wanting.
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Chapters
5 chapters
1
What is the purpose of this episode and who are the hosts?
0:00–5:38
2
Why did Jackie decide to present on the joys of being autistic?
5:38–10:14
3
How does Jackie keep herself regulated and grounded each day?
10:14–17:37
4
What challenges did Jackie face after getting married and moving in together?
17:37–28:53
5
What are the main joys of being autistic that Jackie highlights?
28:53–32:44
Speakers
1 identifiedMore from Neurodiverse Love with Mona Kay, MSW, Ph.D.
Lessons Learned & Lived Experiences: Mona’s Final Solo Episode
Improving Regulation & Communication-Jill Corvelli, Daniel Dashnaw, Barbara Grant & Jessie Mahoney
How is Neurodivergence Impacting Your Relationship?-Karen Doherty
Could I Really Be Autistic? Your First Steps to Self Discovery-Sarah Hendrickx
Imposter Syndrome, RSD, PDA & More-Panel Presentation from 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference
Creating Consensual Reality in Your Neurodiverse Relationship-Margaret Cocharan