Pardon My Take
NFL Week 16, Fastest 2 Minutes, Bears Walk Off Win Over The Packers, Panthers Beat The Bucs, Patriots & Eagles Clink, CFB Playoffs And Who's Back
22 Dec 2025
Chapter 1: What games are covered in the Fastest 2 Minutes segment?
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On today's part of my take, presented by DraftKings, NFL Week 16. We're going to recap it all. Crazy Saturday night. Crazy college football playoffs. We're going to recap. JMU. Shout out JMU. Safety is spread. We have teams eliminated. Teams alive, some upsets, some crazy games. We're going to get to all of it. It's another Monday. Pardon my take. Nothing better.
We're going to start with Fastest Two Minutes. We've got Who's Back of the Week as well. And it's all brought to you by GameTime. The NFL's in full swing. Tailgates, packs, stands. That buzz before kickoff, but getting in nightmare. Cues, price jumps, getting logged out mid-click. All you want is to be there, beer in hand, losing your voice with the crowd.
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Welcome to Part of My Take, presented by DraftKings. The crown is yours. Today is Monday, December 22nd. Week 16. Let's be the first to wish you and yours. A Merry Christmas. We're saying it again.
In Chicago where Jordan love hurts, love scars as a quarterback was knocked out of the game in the first half only to have Malik Willis tower over the Bears defense using his arms and legs making Bears fans fall to the floor in agony as the game felt like it was slipping away. Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun. Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun. Oh my God, is that the Iceman's music?
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Chapter 2: What happened in the Bears vs. Packers game?
We don't have a boomer for this one, but we need to mention that Jacksonville Jaguars and Trevor Lawrence of Arabia are the best team in the AFC, maybe. Hey, go get some money out of the Travis ATM. Trevor Lawrence. Bretton Strange. That's just a name. Cam Little Boy Blew It. Oh, no. He did it. He nailed it. Liam Cohn Brothers 3420 Jaguars. Tony, can you dig it? Can you dig it?
Jags, we're jagging off. Jag off, jag off, jag off, jag off. I'm just nutted. We're just in an impromptu boomer for the Jags. See you in the pool. Standing on the corner, Jameis Winston in Hoboken. Such a nine sight to see. It's JJ, my lord, and his hand is sore. So now it's Rosmer at TV. Come on, Jackson. You weren't passing. They took away the shotgun and caught you lacking.
Viking 16, the G-Men 13. And that was Fastest Two Minutes from Week 16 in the NFL brought to you by our friends at Chevy. Football season is here. Whether you're grinding through the week. or gearing up for kickoff, there's one ride that's always game ready, the Chevy Silverado. Chevy Silverado is a longtime partner of mine, taking our favorite truck, and it's all about grit.
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We are taping this as the Patriots play the Ravens, so you will get some live Hank reactions, which will be great. Those are the best kind of Hank reactions. Those are the best kind of Hank reactions. What a weekend of football. We had Mega Day on Saturday. We had college football playoffs. We had Week 16. We just got done watching the Steelers and the Lions game. The Bears are in the playoffs.
The Niners are in the playoffs. The Eagles are in the playoffs. Texas A&M is the women's volleyball champion. Yep. A lot going on this weekend. There's so much going on. So let's just dive in because we've got a lot to get to. Let's start. We'll do chronologically. Saturday, Eagles 29, Commanders 18, Max. Congratulations. You've clinched your playoff berth. You've won the NFC East.
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Chapter 3: How did the Eagles perform against the Commanders?
How do you feel? I think this team might still stink. Why? They were losing to the Commanders. It's true. They had seven. We were losing with three minutes to go in the third quarter, and then Josh Johnson happened, and then it turned into a boat race. I'm not very confident in this team. If we're being completely honest, I'm not very confident in this team.
I thought the offense looked pretty good in the second half for you guys. A lot of that was because we had Josh Johnson. We were getting good field position because of Josh Johnson. Yeah, America got Johnson big time on Saturday. I think Josh Johnson is probably a good dude. He's played for every team in the NFL. Every team ever. I'm happy that he's still getting a paycheck every week.
That's good for him. Is he a quarterback that I want to watch on Christmas Day? No. Christmas. Josh Johnson might ruin Christmas for America. He might do that. Josh Johnson, by the way, do you know that Josh Johnson is actually a sneaky good luck charm for the Philadelphia Eagles, Max?
Because in 2017 or sorry, 2018, the Eagles clinched a playoff spot in week 17 with Josh Johnson starting a quarterback for the Washington. Were they the football team then? What year was that? 2018. 2018. I think we were the Redskins. Yeah. In 2022, the Eagles clinched the NFC Championship game. Josh Johnson played a little bit in that game after Brock Purdy got hurt.
And then on Saturday, then he got hurt. And then Saturday, Josh Johnson shows up. So three times in the last seven years, you guys have clinched something with Josh Johnson on the field. I will say in that first half, I thought it was a pretty even game. I thought both teams were about even, and Mariota played decently. Jake Elliott sucked. Max was right. He doesn't trust Jake Elliott.
I wouldn't trust Jake Elliott either. But you went into the postseason last year not trusting Jake Elliott. Remember that? That's true. That's true, but I live in the present, and right now he sucks ass. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, that's a problem. It's a scary proposition to go into the playoffs with a kicker who sucks ass. Max does live in the present. Yes. We always say that about him. He's a big time.
I'm going into the rest of this season with low expectations, which could be fun. I feel like the Eagles, I see it differently where the Eagles are one of those teams that because they had a little hiccup there in the middle of the season, they're now getting healthier. I mean, Jordan Davis has been great in Jalen Carter's role, so you now have depth there. Jalen Carter's coming back.
Lane Johnson's coming back. I feel like the Eagles are going to be the team that everyone has written off, and they're the Super Bowl champs. Like, they have a great defense. You have a great defense. The defense is very good. And the offenses look like it's starting to maybe do some different things that make it better. Yeah, I mean, the Commanders have the worst defense in the league, though.
That is true. That is true. That is very true. I think it all depends on Lane Johnson. Lane's coming back this week. It's the most basic analysis I can give you. Lane Johnson and Jalen Carter are both returning against the Bills this weekend.
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Chapter 4: What were the highlights of the Panthers vs. Bucs game?
I mean, you know, if you're Giants fan, it's not been fun, although you're going to get a top draft pick because you find ways to lose. We'll talk about that game later. But can I give you some stats that are pretty crazy that are insult stats to the Giants? Since 2011, the Eagles have won six NFC East titles. The Giants have had six head coaches. That's pretty crazy.
Also, Saquon Barkley has already rushed for more yards in his first two seasons as an Eagle than he did in his first four seasons with the Giants combined. That's pretty good. Yeah. I'm a fan of both of those stats. And I know you're down. Well, you're not down, but you're not trusting of this team.
Jalen Hurts and Nick Sirianni, five seasons together, five playoff bursts, three NFC East titles, two conference titles, and a Super Bowl. That's pretty damn good. They're always in the mix. They're always there. And that is solidified again by clinching a playoff berth on Saturday. I would say that winning back-to-back NFC East championships is more impressive than winning the Super Bowl. Yeah.
Hasn't been done since. There's been a lot of Super Bowls in the NFC East. There's not been a lot of that in the past. That's true. Exactly. That's true. There have been four Super Bowl titles in the NFC East in that time span? Yep. Yep. Two of the Giants, two of the Eagles. Yeah. So this is like the crowning achievement of the Sirianni era. That's a really good spin zone. Yeah.
Think about it that way. Are you a little nervous that Dan Quinn said after the game, if that's how they want to get down, all good. We'll play them again in two weeks. Talking about the fight. That's how you want to get down, Max. I didn't know you got down like that. Your one guy threw about 17 punches. Yeah. Tyler Steen. I feel like he's probably going to get a suspension.
He might get a suspension. If I had to guess. He just kept throwing punches. But there were two guys that got it. You guys had two guys get thrown out, and we only had one because he just started fighting everyone. Well, yeah. One guy fight everyone. I actually liked it. I liked what happened when Steen, he went at it with one dude. I think it was maybe Ken Long. No, I think it was Mikey.
Well, no, with Mikey, they started jawing at each other because Mikey saw him going at somebody else. And Mikey is about exactly my size, I would say. I think he's like 5'8", probably like 180 pounds. And he goes up to your offensive lineman and starts beefing with him. And then we just attack your guy.
I said it was like a bunch of lions when you watch lions trying to bring down an elephant together. Mm-hmm. It was like all of our smallest guys jumped on your biggest guy and just tried to tear him to the ground. I like to fight from the team. I don't know. Sirianni's explanation was when he wanted to go up 19 instead of 18. Because why? Because of a reason.
I didn't get that either, to be quite honest. I guess because a touchdown and a field goal and then a touchdown with a two-point conversion would get you to 18. Maybe. Sure. But you need two touchdowns and two two-point conversions with a field goal to get. I didn't really get that part of it. But he was saying that math was involved somehow.
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Chapter 5: What insights are shared about the Giants' management and their current situation?
But I don't know. I saw someone, there was some article or maybe I was just watching TV that Mr. Mara said that he's trying to learn from his father, his late father, to be more patient. Yeah. Which this feels like the patience is not a good thing. It's not a virtue in this situation when it's keeping guys around. I don't think with Joe Shane, patience should be exercised. Yeah, I feel bad.
Giants fans need just everything to change. Everything. Everything to change. Get a good coach. I think Jackson Dart is good, but also I'm scared that he gets concussed all the time. I don't know. I think they might just ā it might be the dumb blonde thing. I think they might just see Jackson Dart and be like, oh, is he concussed?
Chapter 6: What are the implications of the latest NFL playoff seedings?
Let's check him out. Oh, no, he's not? All right, let's send him back in. I think that's prejudice from the medical examiner, the guy with the red hat on the sideline. Now, for Max Brosmer, I think he's probably going to play next week. I don't know. It's too early to say, but I think I read that J.J. didn't have a broken hand. Can we look that up? He didn't? I don't know.
He was acting like it was broken the way they were squeezing it. Yeah. The Vikings are definitely in that category of building something for next year right now because they're banged up, but they're playing good football. It's funny to look at the standings.
Chapter 7: How do the Jaguars perform against the Broncos?
So they've been eliminated for a couple weeks now. They are ahead of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, and the Bucs are not eliminated because they're still fighting for the NFC South. That's crazy. So if you're asking yourself, would the Vikings potentially win the NFC South? The answer is yes, they would. Easily. Yeah. X-rays negative. X-rays negative. Okay, that's good. Because it did look bad.
He had an interception, but it was off a receiver's hands. Yeah, it bounced right into the corner. And then Brosmer, yeah, Brosmer didn't play well. They said after the game, the Vikings like his mental makeup. Okay. So two guys on the Vikings with cool makeup. This is another one of those games we've probably talked about too long. Yeah. But, yeah, okay. I think I just like saying Max Brosmer.
I do, too. Max Brosmer. Yeah. Last early game, Titans 26, Chiefs 9. If you didn't know Chris Oladukun, now you do, brother. 3 for 8 for 15 yards, right in your fucking face. Bummer for Gardner Minshew. I mean, we said this was going to happen. The Chiefs were the most quit team ever.
Chapter 8: What are the key takeaways from the Ravens vs. Patriots game?
If there ever was a team that could be like, hey, you know what? I want to quit. It was this Kansas City Chiefs team without Patrick Mahomes. Yeah, so Minshew goes in there, tears his ACL, stays in the game. It sucks. And tries to keep playing. Then he has to be taken out. And then the Ola Dukin experience. Not great. Wasn't a fun watch.
The Titans beat them with experience of playing meaningless games, and Cam Ward looked pretty good today. Yeah. This is great for all the Cam Ward fans out there. He had his best game. Yeah. Yeah, and he's getting better, and yeah, the Titans look like a competent team. I don't know. It's crazy to see it, but the Chiefs are the 12th pick right now.
They could definitely end up being a top 10 pick, which is nuts. In a year where things fell apart, they might have fallen apart perfectly where it's not like they missed the playoffs by one game. They're going to miss the playoffs by multiple games and end up with a top 10 pick. Let's see what awesome player they got on Tankathon in the mock draft. It's going to be someone they need.
At 12, the Kansas City Chiefs select David Bailey, Edge, Texas Tech. Okay, that would be a good player. That would be a good player. They need some pass rush. I don't really know what... Yeah, I don't know where the Chiefs are going to go. I think we're going to talk a lot about the Chiefs in the offseason of what are they going to do.
It's weird that Travis Kelsey's last catch in the NFL could potentially be from Chris Oladukun. I heard he was thinking about coming back. Oh, he is. Did I hear right? He's thinking about it. Is he doing it for... Let's keep it off the podcast, Travis. Let's play a fair game here, okay? Let's play straight up here. Ratings for ratings. Let's not do this on the podcast. You know what?
I'm also considering coming back to the NFL. I will make my announcement sometime in March. Let's do this traditional way. Let's do it through the newspapers. I want you to bring Ed Werger to your house, Travis. We don't need to do the podcast thing and have everyone be watching every second of... We like you guys, but it's a little unfair.
I want you to sit down with Ed and have him bring out his notepad. And then you wait for three days afterwards so that Ed can file it. And then I want to read it when it comes out in the Dallas Morning News. Yeah, sure. Yeah, the DMN. Yeah, we'll get a subscription to the DMN if you just agree to newspaper writers need a little bump. Let's help them out.
It's sad that Travis Kelsey is eliminating so many jobs of journalists. It's true. What else we got from this game? Anything? That's about it. Jeffrey Simmons is really, really good. Yeah, the refs kind of fucked him over. Yeah, they did. They called him for illegal formation because he reported as eligible. He said afterwards, like, yeah, I got this big fucking arm brace on my hand.
I wear a red sleeve. The ref should see me when I pat my chest. Yep. Justice for Jeff. Okay. Yeah, that was a game that happened. Shout out to the Titans. It's good that if you're a Titans fan, Cam Ward looked good. That is all that matters these last few games. He threw for 228, two touchdowns, didn't make any mistakes. The offense moved the ball. These are good things. Listen, the Titans.
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