Episode 2834 CWSA 05/09/25
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What are the latest stock market trends?
my stocks looks like stocks are up tesla is up holy cow tesla's way up the sb 500 is up a little bit bitcoin's up sharply looking good i guess we should have a show do you want to have a show get my comments working here and then we'll get going Good morning, everybody, and welcome to the highlight of human civilization. It's called Coffee with Scott Adams, and I'll bet you never had a better time. But... If you'd like to see if you could take this experience up to levels that nobody can even understand with their tiny, shiny human brains, all you need for that is a cup or mug or a glass, a tank or chalice, a stein, a canteen jug or flask, a vessel of any kind. Fill it with your favorite liquid. I like coffee.
And join me now for the unparalleled pleasure of the dopamine end of the day, the thing that makes... Everything better. It's called the simultaneous sip, and darn it, it's going to happen right now. Go. Don't you feel better? That will cure your diabetes in women. That's the latest news. Well, unless you're the last person on earth who knows it. An American pope was selected.
Why is there an American Pope now?
We've never had an American pope. And I heard some people who know what they're talking about say that in the past, when they considered American candidates to be pope, I guess that would have been the cardinals, they decided that they didn't want to make it look like America owned everything. Like America has the biggest military, has the biggest economy. And they didn't want it also to be looking like it was leading the Catholic Church. So apparently the thinking was that they wouldn't select an American pope until America was in decline. just so it wouldn't look like America was getting everything, all the good stuff. So, well, I don't know. Is America in decline? Has the Catholic Church just basically indirectly given us the warning?
I guess we could have an American Pope now. Looks like you're all in decline. Let's see if this is working. Hmm. But the American Pope, I guess he grew up in Chicago and went to Villanova and he was a math major and he speaks five languages. And good luck. Good luck to him. We'll see. You know, it feels like, I'm just going to speculate, it feels like if the Catholic Church wanted to have more influence in, let's say, big things that America is involved in, it probably would help a lot that they've got an American pope. Because don't you think the American pope, somebody else said this, I'm borrowing this idea, don't you think the American pope could pick up the phone and just call Trump? Of course he could. They could just have a phone call. Whereas I don't think there's ever been a pope Is there? When was the last time there was a pope who spoke English and, well, there's never been an American one.
So you know Trump would take the call and he'd probably just hang out with him if he wanted to. He'd probably have dinner with him. So it might be one of the most genius things the Catholics have come up with if they want to have some kind of more influence on things they care about like immigration and the environment, etc. So we'll see how that works out. In other incredibly important news, Melania Trump unveiled a U.S. stamp honoring Barbara Bush. So I guess it was a little dicey about who would be unveiling it because, you know, President Trump has said such bad things about the Bush family in the past. He was the wrong choice. So Melania was probably exactly the right choice. And not many of the Bush family showed up.
I guess some cousins or something showed up. But all I can say about the Barbara Bush stamp is, personally, I'd be afraid to lick it. But that's just me. That's just me. That's the oldest joke in the world. You knew somebody was going to say that. According to the New York Post, there's this top ex-NASA official who claims that he saw a large white flying saucer in a big warehouse that had a U.S. Air Force logo, and he was told it was using the alien technology that they'd captured. So he claims that he... He once actually saw it himself. Dr. Gregory Rogers. And it was part of a secretive project. Now, how many of you think that's true? Do you think this story is true? And the U.S. Air Force built their own UFO based on alien technology? I have one word for you. Nope.
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4 chaptersSpeakers
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