How to Stop Drinking Every Night: Is It Normal? Alcohol Use Disorder Explained
episodePreviously titled “Gray Area Drinking: You Don't Have to Hit Rock Bottom to Have a Drinking Problem” — renamed by the publisher on Sep 22, 2026
RECOVERable: Mental Health and Addiction Experts Answer Your Questions
45 min
5 chapters
transcribed 1 month ago
Transcript
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Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
What is Alcohol Use Disorder (AUD) and how is it diagnosed?
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It's important to have some self-reflection around what are motivators for picking up that drink.
National mental health expert Kelly Kitley, a licensed clinical social worker with more than 20 years of experience, shares her holistic approach to breaking cycles of trauma and addiction.
If you are recognizing that you're setting an intention before you drink and you're not able to stay on that path of stopping after one or two, you may wanna seek some more exploration with that.
Welcome to Recoverable. I'm your host, Terry Maguire. So navigating the spectrum of alcohol use can feel like trying to read a map in the fog. On the one end, you've got the clinical diagnosis of alcohol use disorder. On the other, you've got casual social drinking. And in between is gray area drinking. And we're going to be talking about that space where a lot of people live, work, and silently wonder if they've crossed a line. We are joined again by Kelly Kitley. Thank you for joining us. So good to be here. And I'm so grateful to have your perspective as both a clinician and as someone with lived experience with an alcohol use disorder, because it just is such a whole perspective that it really helps to bring that to this discussion.
I mentioned two terms in the open, alcohol use disorder and gray area drinking. And I'd love to start with you just defining both, please.
Sure. So alcohol use disorder is a diagnosis in the diagnostic and statistical manual of mental health disorders that we use. And really it is a list of qualifiers, so to speak, that goes into the area of drinking more or longer than intended, trying to cut down, but being unable to, um, having cravings or urges, being unable to stop on your own, increased dependence, and having kind of a checklist of saying, can I identify with any two of these over the last 12 months? And then in the gray area drinking, that is more not a specific diagnosis, but it's more culturally looked at as maybe I'm higher functioning, I'm not having a whole lot of negative consequences in terms of losing my job or it impacting my family, but I'm recognizing I'm drinking and it's not making me feel good or I'm regretting things that I did or said.
So it's really important to look at alcohol use as a whole health perspective along the the spectrum.
Does the lack of those really high losses, those high consequences, you know, I've never lost my job, I've never gotten a DUI, I'm still married, I'm still functioning in a in a relationship, so I can't be. Does the lack of those negative consequences allows some people to stay in an addiction without understanding that's where they are. Absolutely. I
think it gives us a benchmark of saying, Well, I'm not that bad or I'm not as bad as and so sometimes we do need some Consequences to make behavior changes. And that can be an internal motivator sometimes if we're having some shame around some of those consequences. But oftentimes people ha we have our blinders on and w sometimes it's helpful for a family member or friend to shine light on maybe. things that they're noticing with our
drinking habits. And it's significant to note that the list you just read doesn't have lost your job, trashed your car. You know, it it's it's very different criteria for diagnosis.
It is. And and it has changed over the years. Um, especially we're in the the fifth manual now. Removing labels sometimes for people can be very helpful, but it's also important to be realistic and and honest
about how you're drinking. So to that end, here's one of the top questions asked on the internet from people who are looking this up, this topic, and it is, is it normal to drink every night?
No, it is not normal to drink every night. Um, and it depends on how much you're drinking as well. Um, the medical guidelines say that one drink a night for women and two drinks a night for men is considered moderate drinking.
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Chapters
5 chapters
1
What is Alcohol Use Disorder (AUD) and how is it diagnosed?
0:00–9:30
2
How can I tell if I’m in the “gray‑area drinking” zone?
9:30–20:29
3
Is drinking every night normal, and what does daily alcohol do to my body?
20:29–31:17
4
How does nightly alcohol consumption affect my sleep quality?
31:17–40:03
5
Why does trying to moderate drinking usually fail?
40:03–45:12
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