Savage Love Episode 1036
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What is the opening intro and who are the hosts of the Savage Lovecast?
You're listening to the Savage Lovecast, Dan Savage's sex and relationship show for grown-ups. If you're under 18, get out of here, young'un.
If you're stuck in a relationship quandary Or if you're looking for sexual harmony Well, there's nothing you can't ask On the Savage Lovecast
Two heartwarming stories of uplift to start the show this week. Our first story takes us to the Download Festival in England, where a young man, Innes Miller, was lucky enough to meet a young woman at the all-day open-air concert there. They were into each other. They were a little fucked up, which, you know, most people at music festivals can be found at some point along the fucked up spectrum. And this young man and this young woman wanted to be alone and there was nowhere to be alone. They were waiting in a field with thousands of other people for the main act to take the stage. And then they saw it in the distance. Not a port-a-potty. but a Ferris wheel and not the kind with open air benches, but the kind with glass enclosed pause sort of Ferris wheel gondola style.
So they got a pod to themselves. They got a room with a view and they went for it. but while the pod was glass enclosed the glass was not opaque it was not frosted the glass was designed so the people in the pod on the ferris wheel could appreciate the view but that means their concert goers on the ground if they looked up could appreciate the view themselves the view into the pod I have seen the video, the videos, plural, that went crazy viral, and Miller and his new friend could clearly be seen in their pod on the Ferris wheel having sex. Police were notified, but the ride and the blow job were over by the time the police arrived. They put out still images and set about locating the couple at the festival.
And while most of the crowd, according to reports in New Music Express, was not offended, the crowd cheered, at least one person was offended. There was a mom on the Ferris wheel with her tween son at the time of the incident, and the kids saw everything. Because I guess the mom was in too much shock to do that classic parental move of clapping your hands over your kids' eyes. Here's where things get a little weird. The woman involved, the woman who gave the blow job, was contrite when interviewed by the police. She basically said, oh shit, sorry, my bad. And those were the magic words, I guess, so far as the police were concerned. Charges against her were dropped and her name and her age were not released to the public.
But Miller, for his part, and his part, judging from the videos I saw, yeah, his part was considerable. He wouldn't say sorry. So he got arrested, he got charged, he got put on trial. Now seems to me that if someone isn't in trouble for giving you a blow job, you shouldn't be in trouble for getting that blow job. So long as we're talking about consensual blow jobs.
How did the Download Festival Ferris‑wheel threesome go wrong and what were the legal consequences?
And it's not technically illegal to have sex in a public place in the UK. Again, according to New Music Express, which was all over this story, so long as you don't think while you're having public sex that you can be seen. You can make a reasonable assumption that you will not be seen. And Miller and this young woman both claimed they did not think they could be seen, which is not a claim that stands up to scrutiny. Another interesting wrinkle in the law, it is not illegal to have sex in public places in the UK except in public toilets. Which seems pretty homophobic now. Sex in public toilets isn't something all gay men enjoy. It's never been my thing because blech. But late pop star George Michael famously defended cottaging, which is what the Brits call hooking up in public toilets, as a part of gay culture that straight people would never understand and shouldn't judge or police.
So a law that legalizes public sex everywhere. People believe they could stand a good chance of not being observed, except the one place where gay people have public sex, usually without being observed, public toilets, cottages. Hard not to see that as a homophobic double standard.
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Chapters
5 chapters
1
What is the opening intro and who are the hosts of the Savage Lovecast?
0:00–3:15
2
How did the Download Festival Ferris‑wheel threesome go wrong and what were the legal consequences?
3:15–10:56
3
Can a partner’s regular facial treatments really improve skin health?
10:56–11:00
4
Why did the man’s confession about difficulty ejaculating cancel the MMF threesome?
11:00–18:33
5
What advice does Dan give for improving consistency of orgasm while on SSRIs?
18:33–43:35