UNCUT | John C. Reilly Doesn't Like Food Videos
episodePreviously titled “John C. Reilly Doesn't Like Food Videos” — renamed by the publisher on Sep 1, 2026
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What do servers need to stop saying?
So what's your take? My take is, it has to do with restaurants. Waiters and restaurants. At some point in the modern era, I feel like waiters started to get trained by corporate consultants. And they started to say this one phrase that I find disgusting. And they say it. What is it? It's mostly kind of corporate restaurants that do it. But it's like, they come up to the table after they serve you food, you start to eat. And then they go, how's everything tasting? Yeah. 100% agree. Right?
I don't like it when they say, how's everything going?
I'm like, get out of my fucking mouth. This is an intimate space. I don't want you to ask about how things are tasting. How is everything? You like, how is everything? Yeah, it's fine. You like, how's everything going? Yeah, it's good to check in. Can I get you anything? Yeah. That's okay. Or even, you know, is everything good? But the other really annoying one is, how are the first bites? Oh. What the hell is that? How are the first bites?
I'm out. I think it's a big problem in America. One of the bigger problems in America is actually the corporatization of... It goes into a bigger thing, which is that restaurants used to be about personality and vibes. And it's like, how you doing?
Well, even if the restaurant wasn't about personality and vibe, at least you would have a personal connection with the person who was serving the food, right? They would have a genuine interaction with you. Like, look at you, see what's going on with you, and give some kind of organic response. Not a pre-programmed line... How's everything tasting? And my son's like totally goof on me all the time now because we'll be having a great meal, you know, sitting at a restaurant and then the person will double back for the tasting and I'll go, my son's always like sort of cracking up. Those are good sons though. Those are good sons because they make fun of you. Exactly. Right?
Like what kind of sons would you prefer? You wouldn't prefer other sons.
no no i like a respectful wise ass what else you got what else what other takes do you have the other take i had was similar to food which is that in movies or commercials i really do not like to see people eat at all i don't want to see like those carl jr commercials where like the hot girls like biting into a cheeseburger things are dripping out of it it's like riley repelling i'm gonna 100 disagree with that really i like when i see people eat that's awful and that thing they do in all those cooking shows like i don't want to know no that's so you don't watch any cooking shows on tv no i mean cooking and then i like i literally like on those commercials come on i'll put my hand over the tv so i don't have to see the food going in the mouth whoa i know it's a weird thing what bothers you the most the mouth
It's just something about like, there's something disgusting about it. I don't know. It's also too intimate. You should do it in private. Yeah, well, you wouldn't stare in someone's mouth while they're eating at a table, right? How's everything tasting?
Should we take the escalator? How do you feel about escalators? I don't mind an escalator. Let's go. In my experience, people don't like escalators sometimes, so I just had to ask you, how do you feel about escalators?
Well, as a kid, I was kind of terrified of them, because my mom would be like, get your hand away from there, your coat will get caught, and then you'll be shredded.
Yeah, you heard about the rumor that everyone knows about.
Yeah, it seems possible.
I mean, look at the sharp teeth. The rumor is that your shoelace gets stuck in there, and...
I've seen a couple of little kids get pretty close to wiping out. But there's no room to suck you into the gears, right? They would just kind of like slowly churn you at the top. Here. Is this the right way? I don't know if we went the right way. Oh, we got to go back downstairs. We got to go back downstairs. So have you ever eaten in a movie? No, that's another thing I find...
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Chapters
4 chaptersSpeakers
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