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Talking Bollox Podcast

Bonus: Death By Condom

28 Apr 2026

Transcription

Chapter 1: What countries are listeners tuning in from?

30.153 - 35.76 Calvin

Is this blanket meant to be behind us?

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35.78 - 40.666 Terry

I just put it there because I felt it might make things a little bit more... So does this make you happier? Cozy.

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41.066 - 45.952 Calvin

Does this make you happier? I put the cushions there but you took them... I'm not throwing them away, I didn't like the look on them.

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45.972 - 51.199 Ed

There is cushion here, I'm not going to lie. The curtains are closed. Calvin. Terence, how are you? Good morning.

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Chapter 2: What disturbing story does a listener share involving a dog?

51.699 - 68.763 Ed

It's five past ten, buddy. What do you want me to do, Terry? Actually, the listeners deserve an apology. I do, do you know what? I met someone on the lift, someone very senior in the building. Okay. Told him it took me 50 minutes to do a 25 minute journey. Okay. And he says, you would have been quicker running in and then donned on me. I fucking would have.

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Chapter 3: What is the hilarious near-death experience shared by Terry's brother?

69.084 - 70.907 Ed

Yeah. It's been a while. It's been a while.

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70.927 - 81.442 Terry

It's been a while. It was a while this morning. It was supposed to be nine o'clock. Yeah. I like the way though he just brings it in straight at like, Was it meant to be nine? Half nine.

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Chapter 4: How do the hosts react to a listener's shocking story?

81.702 - 87.128 Terry

Half nine. I was told nine. I'm here since half eight. Sorry about that. Last night, I'm here since half eight.

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87.148 - 89.771 Calvin

Who told you nine o'clock? Listen, let's not get into that.

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89.791 - 96.198 Terry

That's neither here nor there. There's enough people getting blamed. As Calvin says, a very senior member of Gold Out Management.

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Chapter 5: What funny anecdotes do the hosts share about their mornings?

96.218 - 97.74 Terry

Yeah. That's who he hangs with.

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97.9 - 99.842 Calvin

Yeah. Ed, how are you keeping?

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99.862 - 106.449 Terry

I'm very well, boys. How was Christmas? Good Christmas and all, Ed. Good Christmas. 2012, let's go back. No, I had a good Christmas, yeah.

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Chapter 6: How do the hosts engage with their audience through comments?

106.509 - 108.051 Terry

It's great that the summer's here, though. I feel it.

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108.031 - 113.476 Ed

Oh, stop, boys. The sun is splitting. This will come out and I'll be pissing down, right?

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113.497 - 116.86 Calvin

Nah, it's a bit nippy, yo. Oh, it's cold. Oh, I'm in the shorts, yeah.

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116.88 - 118.041 Ed

Yeah, but you need a top on.

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118.061 - 118.742 Calvin

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Chapter 7: What is the significance of the condom challenge discussed?

118.762 - 124.408 Calvin

You can't be going around in a T-shirt. No, it's not shorts and T-shirt. It's shorts and half zip. It's the best of both worlds, isn't it?

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124.428 - 137.555 Ed

Yeah. Boys, I was extremely late and I'm blaming the bus and I'm blaming the traffic. Do you know what I was saying the other day? A bus parked up outside someone's gaff at the bottom of the driveway and I can only assume that the driver left in the gaff. It was a full on double decker Dublin bus. What a legend.

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Chapter 8: What competition is announced for the listeners in this episode?

137.695 - 146.691 Ed

In the middle of a housing estate. Yeah. Doors open and the hall door was open in the gaff. I was like, he has to live there. And he just nipped around to the gaff. Putting a double decker on a cul-de-sac. Do you know what I mean?

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146.711 - 148.895 Terry

Or he's having an affair with the woman living in that house.

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149.196 - 149.817 Calvin

Whoa.

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150.498 - 151.42 Terry

Think about this.

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151.4 - 159.877 Calvin

Yeah, but is it not a bit risky parking a double-decker bus trying to be discreet? A bit inconspicuous, like. A bit inconspicuous, isn't it?

159.897 - 166.33 Ed

Do you know what the deal? If you're driving the 27, change you out to the 27B and be like, oh, that's not John. Yeah, he drives the 27.

166.551 - 173.104 Terry

Or some mate that you hate, some lad that you hate in the company is on the 47C. Change it to that.

173.084 - 195.7 Ed

And get him to blame Freeman Yeah Glenn the bus driver Is going to be listening To this human Yeah No lads you can't do that Because when you leave the depot It's already set Alright Glenn For fuck's sake Oh sorry boys Last week's episode No Oh that's mad I'm literally going Are you going to do that I was going to do it as well Okay go on you do it Right let's So last Last week we Yeah

195.68 - 207.212 Calvin

We called out all the countries, not all of them, Jesus Christ, but we called out some countries that we listened to and there were some obscure ones and we were calling out the top 10 countries that people listened to us in. Does that make sense?

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