Check Yer Thermals
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What should you always check when hunting for a Sheepsquatch?
They also studied the way gay and straight people talk. Hi, nice to meet you. I ride a skateboard. Sounds straight to me. And is straight. Hey there, I ride a scooter.
Gay. On this episode of the Commercial Break.
Check your thermal.
Check your thermal. Check your thermal underwear. Yeah, no, they're good. I made a little bing-bang in my pants earlier from craft services, but I'm good. Anybody got any wet wipes? I got a delicate anus. Biodegradable, please. I don't want to hurt this Boone County. The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now. Welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is the one hit wonder, Kristen Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Kristen. Best to you, Brian. Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Thanks for joining us. We certainly do appreciate it. I just read that Cheesecake Factory is the highest grossing restaurant chain in America. Yay, maybe the world. What have I been missing? What did I miss when I went?
What was I missing? I don't know.
Well, see, when you just stick to just fine.
Yeah, just fine. It's fine. Everything's fine. It's great. It's fine. It's not great. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine.
That's what we're sticking to. So maybe we're on that track.
I really do think that we might be the Cheesecake Factory of Comedy Podcast. We're not offending anybody. The food is fine. The service is fine. You go in the restaurant, it looks fine. Everything's fine. It's just fine. Everything's fine. And yeah, I think that's our lot in life, Chrissy. And that's okay.
Somebody's gotta be middle.
Somebody's gotta be middle. Someone's gotta be mediocre. And I have always said this. And I don't think that there's an issue with this. And I don't say this lightly. Actually, this is a philosophy in life. If you stick in the middle of the pack... then life is grand. Once you get up to the top or the bottom, things start getting a little shaky. I mean, look at this Peapoddy over here. What is his name? P. Diddy? He rose all the way to the top, and now look at him. He's a hot mess. This guy can't keep his thing in his pants, and everyone's suing him, and the police are after him, and sex trafficking and all that. I don't want to go to that level. No. I don't want to be at Smartless level or Conan level. I told our agency yesterday we were trying to get a – I don't think we're in danger of that.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
But it's good that we don't want it anyway.
No, we don't want it. We don't want it anyway. I don't want it. Yeah. Chrissy has always said – because I have been recognized a few times for the commercial break, a few times. And I'm telling you that these people were probably mentally ill in some way. But – But anyway, so I was talking to Chrissy about this one time, maybe a year ago. And I was like, yeah, I've gotten recognized a few times. You know, the show's doing well, you know, up on the charts, you know. And I said, we were asking the question, when is famous? When do we hit famous? And Chrissy said to me off air, I don't want to be famous. I'm not looking for anybody to bother me anywhere. Like, I don't want anybody to know me, quite frankly.
And I don't blame her. She might have to get a job eventually. Yeah. She's just hoping she can ride in the middle of the commercial break is in the middle and Chrissy is in the middle of the middle. She is insulated. I say good for you. That's a good strategy because I'm the asshole who keeps saying shit that's going to get me in trouble. Cheesecake Factory, the number one grossing restaurant chain in the United States.
There's something for everyone.
There is something for – it's a 272-page menu. So if you haven't been to a Cheesecake Factory, I don't know where you live.
It's good cheesecake, I have to say.
They do.
I haven't been in years.
No, I think the last time I went was before the pandemic.
I haven't been as recently as Kanye.
No, Kanye apparently is setting up Cheesecake Factory every third fucking day. Every third day. Oh, when you find something you like. It's insane. I was sharing with our agency. We were negotiating to get a special guest in on the commercial break we were negotiating.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What should you always check when hunting for a Sheepsquatch?
0:00–6:01
2
What does it mean to be in the middle of the pack?
6:01–14:18
3
How does Bryan feel about his connection to Conan O'Brien?
14:18–20:19
4
What are the humorous challenges faced by the Mountain Monsters crew?
20:19–27:38
5
What is the significance of the Cheesecake Factory in the conversation?
27:38–34:45
6
What unexpected stories arise from the Poptart discussion?
34:45–40:53
7
How do the hosts react to the antics of the Mountain Monsters team?
40:53–54:28
8
What final thoughts do the hosts share about their experiences?
54:28–57:02