Chapter 1: What went wrong with Netflix's live event?
On this episode of The Commercial Break. You know the story. Okay, it's as old as time. Someone becomes a guru, a cult starts, someone gets rich and it's not you. That's it, right? Yes, correct. All right, there you go. And no one gets spiritual enlightenment because everyone's butt hurt because they were in a cult. Now they have to get out of it and pay for therapy and all that other good shit.
Right. The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now. Yeah, cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is the candy to my Amanda, Kristen Joy. Totally best to you, Kristen.
Best to you, Brian.
Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Wow, wow, wow. Yeah. What a weekend.
Chapter 2: How did the Taylor-Serrano fight unfold?
I mean, what a Friday night. I know. For Netflix. What a shit show. What a shit show for Netflix. The PR disaster they deserve. I'm sorry. Love Netflix. They bring us a lot of guests. I love their support of comedy. I think they've changed the landscape in a lot of good ways and then some bad. But they cannot do live to save their fucking lives.
This is like the second time, right?
This is the second, third, fourth time. I'm trying to figure out who does live worse. Elon Musk or Netflix. I can't decide. My dad and I watched the fights. I know you were watching, too. We were texting back and forth.
Yeah, Jeff and I were watching. Uh-huh. Or when we could.
Yeah. When it was available. Yeah. I mean, so let me give you a little... So I tell my dad, first thing, I said, Dad, we got Netflix, right? He's like, we got Netflix. We're good. It's installed on my TV. I said, okay, great. Fantastic. He's got this new fangled... My dad spent money on a TV. I'm so proud of him. I'm so proud. Big, nice, flat screen, 4K, you know, the whole thing.
So proud of him. And so he's got the little Netflix button on the remote. And so it turns out he does have a Netflix account. I was just shitting you guys. But anyway. So we turn it on right as it gets started at eight o'clock. Everything is fine until right before the Taylor Serrano fight. And then shit starts going haywire. I mean, but here's the thing. So we're at my dad's house.
Two of the kids are on iPads. My stepmom is in the other room watching TV. Astrid's, you know, looking for studio chairs in 4K or something. I don't know what she's doing down there. I got my phone connected to the Internet. Like, we're not exactly in the middle of civilization with my father. So I thought maybe he's got like that old, you know, 1G internet going on.
It's like, Dad, I think it's just your internet's congested. So we run around the house making everybody get off the internet. Get it off the internet. And no improvement whatsoever. It's sticky. It's like 102P. You know what I'm talking about? I said to Dad, I go, this is how you guys used to watch fights, like in 102 quality. Like it was just fuzzy and weird.
I know. I kept like getting out of Netflix, getting back into it because I thought that was the problem. I didn't know. I mean, it would freeze, stop, whatever.
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Chapter 3: What were the highlights of the Jake Paul vs. Mike Tyson fight?
Turn on another show on Netflix to see if it has the same problem. And what I found, my dad was watching The Diplomat at some point, which is a great fucking show, by the way. It is a great show. So good. So good. I love that. Kerry Washington, is that her name? No. No. Kerry Russell? Yes. Oh, my God. What a smoke show and such a great actress.
Yeah, it's a great show.
She was so good in The Americans. Did you watch The Americans?
I didn't, but I kind of want to go back and watch that now.
Go watch The Americans. So good. One of my favorite television shows. Anyway, I back out. I turn on the diplomat. Perfect 4K quality. And then I go back to the live. And it's another fuzzy, weird, pixelated bullshit. And all they're doing is talking. Who was the lady who was doing the Amber Rose? Rosie Perez.
No, not Rosie Perez, but the lady who was on the panel with the beautiful black girl with the curly hair. Was that Amber Rose?
No, that's not Amber Rose.
Okay. I don't know what I'm talking about. Anyway, Kate something. Well, anyway, I don't know. So we're watching it. Okay, great. You know, Rosie Perez, that obnoxious announcer who will not shut the fuck up to save his life. Yeah, he was bad. I don't know who that was. You see his hair? Yeah.
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Chapter 4: What is the significance of Guru Jagat in the yoga community?
That guy looked like he's like a Vegas dinner show guy. Yeah. Who just like rolled into Texas Stadium and decided to do some commentary on the fights. He was really obnoxious. I'm sorry. I got to say, he drove me crazy.
And then you had Cedric the Entertainer, too.
Love Cedric the Entertainer. I thought Rosie did great. Rosie did great. Roy Jones Jr. I thought he lended some great perspective. Yeah, insight. Though the commentator, whatever that fucking twad blew in the blue, whatever his name was, and Roy Jones kept on fighting about Tyson biting his glove. But whatever. Okay, we'll get on with it.
So before the ladies start fighting, it's like it turns into a shit show. Then I'm getting kicked out. Chrissy and I are texting each other back and forth. I start going on X, which my dad has no clue how X works, right? So I'm on X. I'm like, look, Dad, X. There's like millions of people. There's like four million people complaining about this right now. He's like, how do you do that?
What channel is that you got on there on the X? How do you tune into a Twitter? And I'm like, Dad, you don't tune into a Twitter. You tune into a fight. What are you talking about? And so we're just, I'm just going through the list and I'm watching how many people are complaining with so many funny memes. It's, it's just lovely. I just, Netflix is falling on its face.
And so I started telling my dad, I'm like, we're going to have to watch this tomorrow. Like there's, I don't, I don't know how we're going to get through an entire fight like this, but we power through and, uh, we watch this fight between Amanda Serrano and Kate Taylor, Katie Taylor. I have never in my life, and I'm a guy who will tune into the big boxing events.
It's not my favorite sport in the world, but I understand that there's something a little bit majestic about boxing, about two people beating the tar out of each other and then smacking hands in the end and saying, you know, good fight. There is something like a little majestic. And I think it's just a boy in me who like, you know, I don't know. Something about it.
And I like listening to the commentators talk about strategy when it just looks like they're really just beating the shit out of each other. But apparently there's strategy to it. These two women put on a show like I have never seen in any boxing match ever. It was incredible.
If you did not watch this and you have the stomach for it, go rewatch the Serrano-Taylor fight on Netflix, and you are in for such a treat because these two women had the biggest balls in the entire stadium all night long.
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Chapter 5: Why is the discussion around cults relevant today?
They really did. I mean, they were going at it. I mean, there was the cut that happened on the face, and then there was blood everywhere. It was nuts.
Round three or round four, Katie Taylor head-butted, and I don't think on purpose, head-butted Serrano, and it opened up a wound above her eye on the outside of the eyebrow. She's going to have stitches. Oh, stitches. You're going to have to super glue that shit together. I know. I was like, odd. And she started bleeding immediately, and it just got worse from there. It was grotesque.
It was hard to look at. And then Netflix, in their infinite directorial wisdom, decided to pan in on that cut any chance they could.
I know. I was just like.
God, stop. How many people threw up? I know.
I thought I was going to see her skull.
Yeah. You could see her skull. It was gross. It was fucking gross. And I think they probably could have handled that a little bit different. If it was me in the directorial booth, I probably would have showed it from a little bit further away. Not so close. But they were showing the cut guy sticking stuff in there. Yeah.
That makes me shiver.
My dad and I, and I am not too squeamish about blood in general. Pimple popping, yes, okay. But blood, not really. But I had to turn away. But after the third or fourth round, after that cut happened, these two just got within one foot of each other any chance they could and smash for smash, hit for hit. Pound for pound, they beat the shit out of each other.
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Chapter 6: How does the episode address the financial aspects of spirituality?
This is Rocky IV. I know. This is Rocky IV. When they just start beating the shit out of each other, it becomes a contest to see who's going to die first. Yeah. And I was like, somebody throw in the towel. I know. We were mesmerized by this fight. And thank God, thank God that Netflix or whoever had the wisdom to put this fight on before Jake Paul and Mike Tyson.
Because Jake Paul and Mike Tyson was the biggest flop since Geraldo tried to find Capone's vault. It was so fucking shitty.
It was. And we saw Mike Tyson's ass.
Yeah.
I mean, I know everybody's seen this meme right now, but I think I woke people up in the house. Everybody was sleeping except for me and my dad. And maybe my stepmom was up somewhere, but she was in the other room trying to not bother our internet.
internet connection um but halfway through the serrano taylor fight in one of the in between rounds they go to the locker room the locker room where mike tyson's son is interviewing mike tyson right before the fight and so all you see is this chest up shot of the two guys and he's saying hey dad what's gonna happen tonight you know my it's just it's just a fight we're just to have some fun times and i just it's all in good fun you know i beat the shit out of him you
You know, whatever he's saying. Okay. Sweet moment. They give each other a hug and Mike Tyson kisses his son. I thought it was a very sweet moment. Like, you know, dad, you're about to die. I love you. And as Mike turns around to walk away from the interview, the camera guy pans out and Mike is walking away in a high-waisted thong.
Whoa, was that a jockstrap? It's a jockstrap.
Yeah, yeah. But all it shows is just his naked ass.
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Chapter 7: What are the implications of celebrity influence in yoga and wellness?
Yeah. Mine looks worse. I'm much younger than he is. uh but second of all what a fuck up on behalf of on behalf of netflix and then we get to the big show you know uh jake paul comes in spraying his brother spraying deodorant all over him in some car did you see that the car situation yes and the spray yeah spraying this deodorant i mean come on guys and the
car i was like really you aren't rich enough you gotta spray deodorant you gotta spray your deodorant all over your brother you think your brother is about to go in the ring with mike tyson you think he wants deodorant all over him i mean what oh god just terrible from beginning to end i wish yeah i mean you could tell almost immediately that it was the joke it was yeah it was basically jake paul just not hurting him
Well, I mean, yeah, you could tell from the beginning that Jake was it seemed to not be taking this all that seriously. I mean, the car, the entourage, which, by the way, I don't know where they find these bodyguards, but God damn, are they big? Did you notice? I thought, well, let's let these guys get in and fight because these are the real heavyweights.
Some of those bodyguards were like 10 feet tall, 600 pounds of pure muscle. It looked it looked. Does Jake Paul need that kind of security? Maybe he does. I don't know. Anyway. So he comes out, razzle-dazzle the whole nine yards, and then Mike Tyson can barely walk to the ring, and he just comes out by himself looking a little scared, if I'm being honest.
And from the moment the bell rings, Mike gets in there, lands a couple of punches, and it looked like Jake got hit. Like, he felt it. Mm-hmm. But he just, he was planted in the middle. It's like his legs were sewn to the ground, Mike Tyson. He couldn't move. He couldn't get on his back foot. No.
And Jake, between the height and the reach advantage, Jake Paul just, he could have destroyed Mike, quite frankly, because Mike was just a sitting duck. And I'll give Jake one... Like, I don't want to tell you that Jake is winning me over, but Jake, I turned the corner just the tiny bit on Jake over the weekend, and I'll explain why.
He's getting paid a lot of money and everybody wants to see the show and everybody wants to see somebody drop somebody. That's why they're there. But it becomes pretty apparent by round number three that Mike is in no condition to fight anybody, let alone Jake Paul. I mean, maybe like a 59 year old against a 59 year old. Maybe Mike then where they're just both kind of standing there.
Yeah.
Like, you know those snowmen that you blow up during Christmas and put out in your front lawn? Yeah, they kind of bobble back and forth? Yeah. Mike and a snowman. I mean, that would be a good fight. But Jake Paul, no. Jake's in... Peak physical condition. And he is really big and he has a great reach and he has knocked people, a lot of people out. Yeah.
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Chapter 8: How does the episode conclude on the topic of enlightenment and personal growth?
That was the winner. That and the ringside girl's boobs. Yeah.
Yes, they looked like they were about to pop like balloons.
The camera was just like right there. But I mean, the boobs on either side would be flanking the person that they were talking to.
That's crazy. Yeah, ring girls in 2024. I mean, I get it. But my dad was like, why are those ring girls still in there? Why do they still do that? And I'm like, I don't know, dad, to be honest with you.
They're all influencers.
Yes.
They are all influencers?
Yeah, we were looking at stuff the next day.
Wow. The winner there is the plastic surgeons. Because holy shit. My dad even said, those things look like they're going to pop. They did look like they were going to pop. They were in those tops were so tight. The boobs were just they couldn't go anywhere else. Once the third round was over, it was like abundantly clear that this was not great for Mike Tyson.
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