Willy Brain Bryan

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The Commercial Break 1h 0m 4 speakers 8 chapters transcribed
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What billion dollar idea does Bryan discuss in this episode?

Krissy Hoadley 0:00
All you ladies, pop your pussy like this. I ain't poppin' my pussy anymore. It's been popped for years.
Unknown 0:07
No pussy poppin' here.
Krissy Hoadley 0:09
What? What? It's the truth. On this episode of The Commercial Break...
Bryan Green 0:20
So my little mouse brain decides to pick the smaller one. Your willy brain? To pick the one with more fluid ounces. My willy brain. That's right. One of our listeners, Caden, says, why is everything that Brian names have to do with a dick? I don't know. I honestly don't. It just turned out that way. Maybe I'm repressed or something. I don't know.
Krissy Hoadley 0:41
The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now.
Bryan Green 0:50
Welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is the sexy nude chef of this show, Kristen Joy Hoodley. Best to you, Kristen. Best to you, Brian. Best to you out there in the podcast universe. All righty, righty, righty. Don't mind if I do. All right, all right. I keep getting older, they stay the same age. Oh, Matt Mixey. Ah, good old Matthew McConaughey. Why isn't he in jail for that one line? Who's canceling that guy? Ah, that line did not age well. No. Did not age well. But it was a different time back in the early 90s and then in the 70s.
Unknown 1:23
And they were already portraying a different time.
Bryan Green 1:25
Yeah, they were portraying the 70s. What a movie, man. God damn, did we watch the shit out of that movie. Oh, yeah. What is that called? I don't even remember what it's called. Fast Times at Ridgemont High? No. No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. American Graffiti.

How does Kristin Wiig's new show impact the hosts?

Unknown 1:36
No.
Bryan Green 1:38
No. What is it? You know it?
Unknown 1:40
Say it. Say it out loud. Oh, my God. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh.
Bryan Green 1:45
What is it?
Unknown 1:47
What is it?
Bryan Green 1:47
You don't know it?
Unknown 1:49
It's on the tip of my tongue, and I watched it so much. I just haven't seen it in a while.
Bryan Green 1:53
It is... Now I have to fucking find it. Why do I have to fucking find it?
Unknown 1:57
You're already on your phone.
Bryan Green 1:58
I thought you were going to know it. I thought you were going to know it. Days that Confuse.
Unknown 2:02
Days that Confuse.
Bryan Green 2:02
I know. There were quite a few movies that came out with similar names, like Half-Baked and, you know, Friday. You know, all the stoner movies. Friday. Friday. Not Fried Egg. Fried Egg. This is your brain on drugs. This is why you shouldn't do drugs, kid. You can't even remember the name of a movie that you watched one million times in high school. But to be fair, I wasn't watching it for the title. I was watching it because it was a funny movie. It was really funny. I loved it. Speaking of funny shows, movies, I walked in on Astrid watching that Palm Royale, I think is what it's called. Kristen Wiig.
Unknown 2:37
Yes.
Bryan Green 2:38
Kristen Wiig.
Unknown 2:38
Got a new show on Apple.
Bryan Green 2:39
Yes, she does. And so I walked in. Astrid was watching like the third episode. And I got stuck. You know how you get stuck? I was like coming from the studio late night of editing and, you know, going down terrible rabbit holes on the Internet. And then I my brain's all a flutter. And then I walk into the room and she's watching the show and I'm going to the bathroom to take a shower. And then I turn around just to see what she's watching. And I got literally standing there for 30 minutes.

What emotional moments does The Bachelor bring up?

Unknown 3:05
Well, you always want to see what Kristen Wiig's doing.
Bryan Green 3:07
Yeah, I always want to see what she's doing. And she looks great in the show. And she's so fucking hilarious. She is. And I guess she wrote the show, too. Palm Royale. So, you know, Kristen, come on the show and talk about it. Why doesn't Kristen Wiig come on the show? Why won't she come on the show?
Unknown 3:21
I can think of a few reasons.
Bryan Green 3:24
I can think of so many reasons why she wouldn't come on the show. That's what I mean. Yeah, like if you put a pro and con list together, if you're a celebrity and you put a pro and con list as we're figuring out, put a pro and con list coming on the commercial break. There aren't many pros. There are a whole shitload of cons. So thank you to everyone who's decided to show up so far. Speaking of, I do want to thank our guest this week, Paul Scheer, for coming in. One of the nicest guys in the business, as if I know anybody else in the business. My little brother works at the production side of things. But Paul was super sweet. I really enjoyed our conversation with him.

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