The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Renames Persian Gulf, Teases a “Big Announcement” & Loses Another Fighter Jet | John Green
Thu, 08 May 2025
Desi Lydic dives into Trump’s ominous “big announcement,” the president renames the Persian Gulf, another US fighter jet falls off an aircraft carrier, and kids swap tariff-priced Barbies for the promise of economic freedom. In honor of the conclave, Lewis Black sounds off on the Vatican's mysterious process to select a new pope, including this year’s parlay options, the surprising number of cardinals taking lessons from the Oscar-nominated "Conclave" film, and the merch being sold to incompetent tourists. John Green, an award-winning author and global healthcare reform advocate, sits down to discuss his No. 1 New York Times bestseller, “Everything is Tuberculosis: The History and Persistence of Our Deadliest Infection.” He explains how a 2019 visit to a TB hospital in Sierra Leone inspired the book, why tuberculosis persists despite having a cure for the disease since the 1950s, how DOGE cuts are affecting global aid and the need for political will, and the infection's connection to everything, from the cowboy hat to weighted vests.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Chapter 1: What are the key highlights of this episode with Desi Lydic?
We've got so much to talk about tonight. The military tries to teach another jet to swim. The Vatican turns into the world's holiest man cave. And Trump is keeping a huge secret. So everybody check your signal chats. Let's get right into it. It's been a rough few weeks for Donald Trump, mostly because Donald Trump. So he's been looking for a way to change the narrative.
And yesterday he made a big announcement.
We're going to have a very, very big announcement to make, like as big as it gets. And I won't tell you on what.
Chapter 2: What was Trump's mysterious 'big announcement'?
So his announcement is that he's got an announcement? Cool. It's great to have a president who does teaser trailers for world events. It's like when FDR said, we only have one thing to fear, and I'll tell you what it is after the break. But OK, Donald, can you at least give us a hint?
It'll be one of the most important announcements that have been made in many years about a certain subject.
A certain subject, that narrows it down to literally anything. This is Donald Trump, so his big announcement could be anything from I've achieved peace in the Middle East to I just tried bucatini and I'm never going back to regular spaghetti. At least tell us if it's good or bad. Should I be stocking up on champagne or toilet paper?
It's very positive. I'd also, I'd tell you if it was negative or positive. I can't keep that up. It is really, really positive.
OK, that sounds really positive. But I want to temper my expectations here, because the last time you had a positive announcement to make, it was that you were destroying the economy. So I just want to make sure. Is it really good news?
It's going to be a truly earth-shattering and positive development for this country and for the people of this country.
Earth shattering, wow. Okay, as long as I don't have to clean it up, I guess I'm in. Just tell me when exactly to tune in and I will clear my schedule.
And that announcement will be made either Thursday or Friday or Monday before we leave.
All right. You have no idea what you're announcing, do you? You're just going to go into the next room and be like, guys, I promised them something big. Does anyone have anything good? I have two to five days. And don't say jello shots, Pete. Next time, just come out when you're ready to say the announcement. We don't need a pre-announcement.
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Chapter 3: Why did Trump rename the Persian Gulf?
We know we have the Gulf of America, formerly the Gulf of Mexico. And next week, President Trump plans to announce the U.S. will refer to the Persian Gulf as the Gulf of Arabia or the Arabian Gulf.
What is it with this guy and renaming gulfs? At least the Gulf of Mexico was on our border, but now he's just going around renaming other countries' water? The Gulf of Thailand is now the Gulf of White Lotus. The Indian Ocean is now the Elizabeth Warren Pocahontas Ocean. And the Black Sea, we're just getting rid of. No more DEI. You know what?
Why shouldn't we be allowed to rename the world's oceans? After all, we have the world's most competent, powerful, competent navy full of competence operating right now at the top of their competence.
for the second time in just over a week, US fighter jet falling off an aircraft carrier and sinking in the Red Sea. The $67 million F-18 Super Hornet crashed into the Red Sea last night and was lost. The pilots managed to eject safely. Just over a week ago, another Super Hornet fell from the same ship.
Not to get all doge over here, but I think we could save some money if we stopped dropping fighter jets into the Red Sea. At some point, we're giving more military aid to puffer fish than we are to Ukraine. Zelensky should just be following behind our aircraft carriers with a giant net. And I know this is all a little concerning, but don't worry.
Pete Hegseth has ordered a top-to-bottom review to determine if there were any rainbow flags on board that might be to blame. Whatever the cause is, we have got to stop dropping $70 million fighter jets into the ocean, people. Otherwise, it's going to change the reputation of America's fighter pilots. And then the Top Gun sequels are just going to start getting real weird.
Another sunk jet. Damn it, Top Gun Maverick. Why do you keep trying to see if planes can fly underwater? It's one of life's mysteries, sir. No, it's not. Jets don't belong in the ocean. I would fire you, but you're white, so Pete Hegseth won't let me. So I'm just going to bet. Please, stop sinking jets. Maybe, sir. But not today. Not today.
That sounds like you're gonna crash another jet into the ocean. Don't you even think... Top pick!
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Chapter 4: What happened with the US fighter jet incidents?
He truly feels the need for speed. And finally, an update on tariffs. They're the reason your MAGA family stopped talking about the economy. Just mine, just my family. Ever since they kicked in, Trump has been telling Americans that they're gonna have to tighten their belts a little. And there's one example in particular that he keeps fixating on.
Maybe the children will have two dolls instead of 30 dolls, you know? I don't think a beautiful baby girl needs, that's 11 years old, needs to have 30 dolls. I think they can have three dolls or four dolls.
15-year-old girl doesn't need 37 dolls.
You don't need to have, as I said, 35 dolls. You can have two, three, four.
She can be very happy with two or three or four or five.
Why do I feel like last week Trump walked in on Eric kissing a doll and now he's like, sorry America, we're banning dolls. Banning them. Either way, it turns out that the whole expensive doll example was not hypothetical.
Mattel, the company that makes Barbie dolls, is raising prices to offset President Trump's tariffs on Chinese imports.
Yes, they're raising prices on Barbie. Even she has to cut back. She had to move out of Barbie's dream house and into Barbie's dream studio apartment with two roommates. Her pink convertible is now a 2007 Toyota Tercel. It's very sad. Come on, don't make Barbie tighten her belt even more. She only has a one inch waist. And Trump's not the only one answering dull-based questions.
Treasury Secretary Scott Besant, seen here watching a bulldozer demolish a local community center, also had some thoughts. Secretary Besant, what would you say to a sweet little girl who wonders why she can't have a new Barbie this year?
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Chapter 5: How have tariffs affected consumer goods like Barbie dolls?
Hey, 10 or 9 or 15-year-old girls, when you can only have one doll, there's only one doll to have. Tariff Tilly, the perfect companion to help you ride out our magical trade war.
I love playing alone with you.
Tariff Tilly is the ideal replacement for those $37 you want but do not need.
China's eating our lunch! Bed chair Gerald Powell is a loser! Lower rates now!
You'll love playing with Tariff Tilly during off-work hours!
It's 5 a.m. Time for your shift at our onshore lithium factory!
And don't forget to grab Tariff Tilly's hottest new accessory! Thing that can carry the babies around in! That's right! Tariff Tilly's thing you carry the babies around in! Now just $7,000! And now you can feed Tariff Tilly with real American-made baby formula! Uh-oh, looks like you got a tainted badge. Oh, a health inspector's got doge. Import Tariff Tilly to your playroom today.
Available Christmas 2029.
When we come back, Lewis Black has the dope on the post, so don't go away. Welcome back to The Daily Show. When a news story falls through the cracks, Louis Black catches it for a segment we call Back in Black.
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Chapter 6: What is the Vatican's conclave process for electing a new pope?
Viewers have been streaming Conclave, the film, in record numbers since Francis' death. Francis... appointed so many cardinals who therefore have never sat through a conclave themselves. Many of them have been watching the movie to get tips on how the process works.
That's funny. Ha ha, isn't incompetency hilarious? Turns out the only qualification you need to vote for the most powerful religious leader in the world is a Peacock account. Look, if you need to watch a movie to learn about a job you already have, you shouldn't have that job in the first place. If I hire a prostitute, I'm not gonna wait two hours while she watches a Nora.
But it's not just incompetent cardinals traveling to Rome for the conclave. It's also incompetent tourists.
Rome locals know the death of a pope guarantees new life for tourism. There's the souvenirs, calendars and key rings, fridge magnets and mugs, and even gelato in Franciscus flavor.
Wow, his own ice cream. That's the kind of honor they only give to Mickey Mouse. Let's hope I don't spill any of it on my the Pope died and all I got was this lousy T-shirt. But if you don't want a shitty Pope keychain, don't worry, because there are other ways to flush your money down his holy toilet.
Global betting sites now taking in a collective $19 million from the thousands of people gambling on the future of the church. The Vatican Secretary of State is the two-to-one favorite, with Cardinal Luis Tagle of the Philippines three-to-one.
Tagle would make history if he were elected as the first Asian pope.
Well, let me get this straight. You want me to bet money on the first Asian pope, and you won't even let me parlay it with the Knicks? That's disgusting. Shame on you. I know I'm picking the Knicks, but tell me more about this Louis Tagle guy.
There's a karaoke king in the conclave, Philippines Cardinal Louis Tagle.
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Chapter 7: How does the conclave inspire tourism and betting in Rome?
But you are the bright light.
Oh, you're very kind.
You have had massive success with your young adult novels, A Fault in Our Stars, Looking for Alaska. You and your brother have had, were kind of early pioneers, so to speak, with your YouTube channel, billions of views. And now you have this number one New York Times bestseller, Everything is Tuberculosis. You're like a modern day Renaissance man.
That's very kind.
who's also trying to eradicate a deadly disease.
Yeah, I'm super opposed to tuberculosis, it's true. I'm a little confused why everyone else isn't. Feels like it should be kind of a universally held opinion. But yeah, I was traveling in Sierra Leone in 2019. I didn't even know that tuberculosis was still a thing, to be honest with you. When I was in Sierra Leone in 2019 and I was asked to go to a TB hospital there.
And when I was there, I met a kid named Henry, which is also my son's name. And through knowing Henry and following his story, trying to recover from drug-resistant tuberculosis over the next five years, I really, I wouldn't say I fell in love with the disease. I guess I fell in hate with it, you know? Yes.
And so that's where this book came from, was from wanting to tell Henry's story of his ultimate story of survival and also wanting to tell the story of the fact that this disease is not history. It's present.
Right. And part of what I loved so much about your book, it was fascinating, but it doesn't just go through the history of tuberculosis and the gravity of the disease itself, but you tell all of these personal stories along the way, like Henry and many others. When most Americans, like you said, think about tuberculosis, they think of it as a thing of the past.
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