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The Daily

Marriage and Sex in the Age of Ozempic

07 Oct 2025

Transcription

Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?

0.031 - 23.774 Andrew Ross Sorkin

This is Andrew Ross Sorkin, the founder of Dealbook. Every year, I interview some of the world's most influential leaders across politics, culture, and business at the Dealbook Summit, a live event in New York City. On this year's podcast, you'll hear my unfiltered conversations with Gavin Newsom, the CEO of Palantir and Anthropic, and Erica Kirk, the widow of Charlie Kirk.

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23.794 - 26.697 Andrew Ross Sorkin

Listen to Dealbook Summit wherever you get your podcasts.

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31.672 - 41.207 Rachel Abrams

From The New York Times, I'm Rachel Abrams, and this is The Daily.

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Chapter 2: How are GLP-1 drugs like Ozempic changing relationships?

41.227 - 65.235 Rachel Abrams

In the last few years, GLP-1 drugs like Ozempic and Zepbound have been radically reshaping the lives of millions of Americans. They have the power to change everything, from our appetites and our health to the clothes that we buy. But they also have the power to affect other parts of our lives, how we date, how we see ourselves, even our closest relationships.

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67.059 - 105.211 Rachel Abrams

Today, my colleague Lisa Miller tells the story of how these drugs upended one couple's marriage and how they dealt with the fallout. It's Tuesday, October 7th. Lisa, I don't think it's an understatement to say that we, in 2025, are in the middle of this, what feels like kind of a weight loss revolution in the United States.

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105.952 - 126.936 Rachel Abrams

And, of course, we're talking about these drugs that everybody's probably heard of, Ozempic, Wegovi, Monjaro. I think most people know somebody who's been transformed by them. Maybe a lot of people themselves have actually had some experience with them. But I would just like to hear a little bit about what interested you initially.

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Chapter 3: What initial questions did Lisa Miller explore about marriage and weight loss?

126.976 - 146.577 Lisa Miller

Yeah, it's a revolution in how we look. It's a revolution in our health. It's got gigantic potential to help people who have not been able to be helped before. And the data show that one in eight Americans has tried one of these drugs, so that's a lot of millions of people, right?

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146.917 - 165.662 Lisa Miller

And so it's creating all kinds of conversations, not just about how we feel and our health, but also how we look and how that matters in the world. Like, I have a friend who takes the medicine, and he says...

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165.642 - 187.507 Lisa Miller

You know, if you are able to eat just five French fries and you used to not be able to eat just five French fries and had to eat the whole plate of French fries, it gives you grounding in the idea that you can control food. things in your life that you didn't think you could control.

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188.328 - 220.168 Lisa Miller

So if you're a person who was completely helpless in the face of a plate of French fries and suddenly you get control of that, what else can you control? Can you control your gym-going habits? Can you control your the way you relate to your children, the way you talk to your boss. So my question was, like, if your body has changed so much, just the shell you walk around in,

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220.368 - 237.204 Lisa Miller

and your mindset has changed so much about what's possible for you, wouldn't that affect the way you relate to everything and everyone in your life, including your most intimate relationships?

Chapter 4: How did Jean and Javier's relationship evolve after weight loss?

238.466 - 253.395 Lisa Miller

And what really interested me was this question of how the GLP-1 drugs affected a marriage, especially when one partner is on the drugs, and the other partner isn't.

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256.615 - 262.583 Rachel Abrams

How did you go about trying to find the right people to talk to to satisfy that question? Right.

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262.623 - 284.332 Lisa Miller

Well, we at The Times have a thing called a call-out where you ask the public a question and that question is posted on social media and in the paper and all over the place. And then we get responses to that question. And the question was this. Has a GLP-1 drug like Ozempic and subsequent weight loss changed your relationship?

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285.927 - 305.944 Lisa Miller

And so it was the week last year between Christmas and New Year's, and it was like presents. And I was getting all of these responses to the call-out, and a lot of them were really interesting, I just want to say. And one jumped out at me. Should I just tell you what he said? Yes, do you have it? Yeah, I have it.

Chapter 5: What challenges did Jean face with her self-image after losing weight?

305.924 - 358.206 Lisa Miller

He wrote, And I thought, there's a lot between the lines here. First of all, a lot of people wrote in about sex, but he was very pointed about it. He's ruminating on why, struggling with it. And so I called them up. Can you hear me? And I talked to both of them. Let's talk about middle names. And they agreed to participate in the story as long as I used their middle names.

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359.215 - 360.698 Unknown

J-E-A-N-N-E.

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361.9 - 362.521 Lisa Miller

Okay.

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366.087 - 366.708 Unknown

That works.

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367.269 - 370.534 Lisa Miller

They live in New England in sort of a nice suburb.

370.675 - 372.838 Jean

We celebrated our anniversary a few days ago.

373.079 - 374.682 Lisa Miller

They had been married for 15 years.

Chapter 6: How did the couple's intimacy change after Jean started taking GLP-1 drugs?

375.022 - 402.614 Lisa Miller

And would you be open to a visit from me? Yeah. Okay. And it became a long relationship. in which I was probing and probing and probing about how these medications were changing the dynamics in their marriage. So tell me more about that. How were the drugs affecting their marriage? Well, I think maybe it's helpful to talk first about what their relationship was like before the drugs.

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403.375 - 405.118 Lisa Miller

And it goes back to high school.

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406.195 - 409.138 Jean

Junior year is when I met her, so that takes us to 1987.

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410.819 - 415.984 Lisa Miller

They both grew up in Sacramento. What did you notice about her? Like, what made you like her?

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416.785 - 420.388 Jean

Her personality. Very outgoing, great smile.

Chapter 7: What are the emotional impacts of losing weight on Jean's relationship?

421.009 - 422.61 Javier

Well, I thought he was cute.

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423.291 - 425.673 Lisa Miller

He was a football player and also in the band.

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425.733 - 440.666 Javier

So, you know, he's an offensive lineman. He's fit, but a big guy, which... You know, as a woman, it's very comforting, you know, when you hug someone like that. You know, you just feel safe.

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441.568 - 446.939 Lisa Miller

And so at that time in high school, how would you have described your own body?

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446.959 - 455.036 Javier

I was overweight, you know, back then. I mean... 17 years old, fat.

455.577 - 460.824 Lisa Miller

She was like in a bigger body and excruciatingly self-conscious about that.

461.225 - 464.209 Javier

So always felt awful, never felt attractive.

464.349 - 487.395 Lisa Miller

And she would say that she became like a super competent pleaser on all the clubs, doing all the things in order to compensate for the way she felt about her body. And he had a crush on her. And they both told me this story about how in high school there was this band performance in town and he offered to walk her to her car.

Chapter 8: How did Jean's changing lifestyle affect her marriage dynamics?

487.615 - 495.282 Jean

So that was my first attempt was, you know, let me walk you out to your car and then, you know, kind of test the waters there.

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495.803 - 504.09 Javier

And I said, no, no, you know, I'm a powerful woman. I don't need any man to walk me to my car. But I thought it was very gallant. And so.

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504.712 - 513.456 Lisa Miller

It was as though she couldn't believe that he liked her in that way. Because she was insecure? She was so insecure about her body.

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513.537 - 536.929 Javier

There have been times in my life where... Someone was actually flirting with me or trying to come on to me, and I just don't register the signs because I feel so uncomfortable in my own body that I feel like they must be bullying me or teasing me or just being mean.

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539.812 - 543.418 Lisa Miller

So even though she had a crush on him, too, she wouldn't believe it.

544.08 - 551.112 Rachel Abrams

So it sounds like basically even though they might have liked each other or he certainly liked her, they did not get together in high school. They did not. But they were close.

551.393 - 559.344 Lisa Miller

Yes. They were unrequited high school sweethearts. And they each married other people.

559.384 - 563.893 Jean

What happened was that my first marriage was coming to an end.

564.133 - 576.336 Javier

My first marriage had just ended. And then all of our friends were reconnecting on Facebook. Jean looked up Javier on Facebook. Our 20-year reunion was coming up that fall.

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