The Determined Society with Shawn French
How Nicole Jaques Helps Parents Replace Chaos With Connection
16 Jan 2026
Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
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Oh, Nicole, what do you do? Oh, I'm a stay at home mom. It was not what I was doing. I was so much more than that. I remember birthing my son and feeling like I had left a version of myself in the past. I'm a businesswoman. Why can't those systems that I had put in place prior to in my corporate career be put in place in the home?
What are some of the things that you put in place immediately that might be able to help some of those moms right now?
As the house CEO, we start to step into our power and that's when the shifts start to happen. You don't need to be doing more adding to the plate. You just need to be leading it differently if it's not working for you or your family members.
Wait a second. This is more about me just being more aware on a day to day.
Remove the tension and the system will start to work.
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Chapter 2: How did Nicole Jaques redefine her role as a parent?
Right. So I didn't grow up thinking this would be my title, but I became a house CEO out of necessity. And now that's basically what I'm able to share here on social media. We started the platform four years ago. My friends were like, you know, weird things, Nicole, share them with the world. And I was like, I don't know if that's really a thing.
And in 90 days we had over a hundred thousand followers and people were like, man, I needed this. Like, where were you when I was growing up, when I was raising kids? Like, and so I just kept doing it. And built it into our now routine. And it's a very full-time business. Keeps me nice and busy.
I love that. I love that. I mean, listen, you know, and that's the thing. One thing that I'm interested in diving into a little bit more right here is there's a lot of... stay at home moms out there that are most likely listening right now. And they think of themselves, I'm only, and this drives me crazy. I am only a stay at home mom.
And I truly feel that is a, and again, I know you echo this, but it's a business, right? It is an opportunity, right? You are truly the CEO of the home. So when you talk of systems, what are some of the things that you put in place immediately that might be able to help some of those moms right now?
Chapter 3: What systems can parents implement to reduce chaos at home?
Um, time blocking is probably one of my best systems that I have in the house. So we all think chores, quote unquote, right? Our to-do list. It takes longer than we think, but really you just need the system in place that tells you. So I have this giant, very loud and obnoxious clock and you can set it five minute increments and the way my brain needs to work.
And this is how most multitaskers work. you know, in the home brains work is you've got one thing on the stove, you've got another in the laundry, you've got, you know, dishes that still need to be done, you've got to vacuum and mop and those things don't need to be done every day. But you need to be able to know it's going to take me seven minutes to do the dishes.
So I have three minutes to go load the laundry, right? It's understanding how fast and efficient you are at each task and then building it into the schedule between kids schedules and making dinner and work, whether it's stay at home work and or just PTA or a book group, right? All of those are the accessories, the hobbies, the things that we do outside of just being the quote unquote homemaker.
I'm going to from now on refer to this as the house CEO. That is the title because we're managing so much more than just kids schedules and diapers or making baby food or packing lunches and getting them to school. And I think once you start time blocking your day, you'll realize, oh,
I have a lot more time to focus on things I want to be focused on, which is how I realized then I could start a platform and continue to work and still not need a nanny or a sitter to take care of the kids and run, you know, a 12 person business, write a book and do things like that because it was very efficient in the home at time blocking. So that's like my number one tip, time block.
So thank you for that. Thank you. Because I want to give the audience some context. And again, time blocking is one of those things that you just have to sit down and commit to and just understand how long it takes you to do a task. But then to build out that system to be like, okay, from this time to this time, I'm doing this and then I can do this.
But you mentioned something that to me was very interesting right there. And I want you to dive in deeper to it because one of the biggest things, like I know during the summer, My wife won't be teaching and she's home. And it's like this whole summer flies by and she's done nothing for herself. And that to me, when you mentioned time blocking so I can spend more time doing things
that I want to do or that fulfill you so you're not just this home CEO. Can you walk me through and the audience through some of the things that you like to do and why it's important for the home CEO to pour into themselves as well?
So when you become, I remember birthing my son and feeling like I had left a version of myself in the past, someone I don't know anymore. And I desperately wanted to sit down with her and have coffee and say, you have no idea the beauty, but also the chaos that comes in parenting. Because I was so naive, right? We all are until you have your first kid. And I think that that's fair to say.
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Chapter 4: How does time blocking contribute to family connection?
It's hard enough without this chirping in your brain. So what I did is I bought these sticky lights, you know, they're like, you know, little light, you know, little light, you bop it on and off. And I put it on the wall, one for my son and one for my daughter. And I made it into a game. They're 8 and 10. This isn't like a toddler game, you know.
And I turned on all the lights in the morning with everything they needed to do to get out the door at the right time. And all the lights are lit. They come in. They are lit. the one who's going to turn off all the lights in order to get out the door on time. And by the way, it gives suggested time in which this task should be done.
Wow.
So here's the kid clock. And guess what? We have zero issue, zero tantrums. Expectations are set. It's kind of a fun game. The siblings sometimes get competitive and it's great. And that's all it took was a simple fix of implementing another system and for efficiencies. So that was something I recently just did.
What's something you're currently struggling with or your wife is currently struggling with with the kids? Let's see if we can put a system in place to help.
Great question. So this is something that I think we're both struggling with and I want to be able to help out with it more, right? So I value, you know, my wife is a teacher. She has her own students to deal with and then she handles the homework and most of the things with the kids. And then there's the laundry, right? So... I would like to remove that completely from her plate.
But at the same time, it's like, I'm super overwhelmed too. You know what I'm saying? Because I have a lot going on. But I would like to create some times during the week where I could... maybe just put a din in that for her, right? And not just put it in the washer and throw it in the dryer because that's easy, right? I love that. I hate folding and putting away.
But I think the major sticking point for her is, man, I just went through this whole week. you know, stressful job, stressful with getting the kids to do their homework. And now I got to do all this damn laundry, you know? And, and if I could help out in any way, like, Hey man, that'd be great. You know, I do the dishes. I do, you know, downstairs is all mine.
Like I do all that and I make the bed and I do all that kind of stuff. My wife always laughs at me and she goes, that's your domain. Like you, you handle that and you don't do anything upstairs. I'm like, baby, that is not true. That is not true. But yeah, I would say, finding a way to collaborate to help her out with those tasks so she's more free and happier when she is home.
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Chapter 5: What is the significance of rest for parents?
So I think that there's a lot tied into it. Technology is something that we've had to adapt to, and it is light years ahead of our adaptation, right? All animals evolve and adapt. This is something that I'm not sure we may ever catch up to, right? It's so far ahead of us. So phones aren't the enemy, unbound access is. Does that make sense?
1,000%.
Exactly. Yeah. So I think, you know, we have similar to how we like run a day to where we build connection, which I really do love.
implore anybody listening to create daily anchors choose one to two anchors a day it doesn't have to be every time you're with your kid okay i'm going to give you something super tangible here and then relate it to the phone but choose one to two anchors a day morning send off after school check-in or right before bedtime short consistent beats long and rare does that make sense
And I think these are just non-negotiables, even on the hard days, because we're human and we're parenting for the first time and living this life for the first time, too. Right. Right. So hopefully that helps. So a lot of me for my house CEO rules is phone down, TV off, multitasking paused. Right. And I like that you ask your kids questions like that. I do that, too.
And I think that's like really important. Right. Something as consistent as Sunday pancakes goes a long way. And the goal is not Pinterest. It's just belonging. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. I think with the phones for me, I work in it. So I tell my husband, I have the ultimate like pull that mommy works in it and sees the dark side. So no, but that's not going to work on a teenager.
You know, it's almost barely working on my eight year old because she has enough sass for her. This neighborhood and yours. But I do think that I kind of have redefined phone free zones. And that's not all day. Like we pledge to wait till eight. Our kids do not have a phone.
We've looked at giving them a 90s childhood for as long as we can, which means one TV in the entire house, not in the bedrooms. No tablets. We don't have those. When they use them in school, they have blue light glasses that they're able to put on so that they can protect their eyes and brains.
And then in addition to all of that, we have a lockbox that my husband and I put our phones in from 5 to 9. We don't need them. We have a landline. We're living in the 90s. The 90s worked. It's fine. And the kids, we actually just are about to receive 10 can phones. Have you heard of these?
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