My Sister-in-Law Overshares About Her Sex Life
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How do I tell my sister-in-law to stop oversharing about her sex life?
My sister-in-law, she can turn any conversation into how her and my brother were intimate. And it's so uncomfortable. How do I tell her to stop?
You don't like talking about your brother's sex life?
So a little part of me always just felt like maybe I'm a little jealous.
What's going on? This is John with the Dr. John Deloney Show, taking your calls on your marriages, your relationships, your mental and emotional health, whatever you got going on in your life. I'm here for you. Here, not for you. I'm here with you. I'll sit here and we'll figure out what's the next right move. I'd love to have you on this show. If you want to be on the show, give me a buzz at 1-844-693-3291 or go to johndeloney.com slash ask, A-S-K. Okay. All right, let's go out to Twin Falls, Idaho, and talk to Sarah with an H. What's up, Sarah?
Hey, John. Thanks for taking my call. I just had a question. My sister-in-law, she can turn any conversation into how her and my brother were intimate, and it's so uncomfortable. How do I tell her to stop?
You don't like talking about your brother's sex life?
You know what? It's so weird. It's really annoying. Okay.
Have you not said, hey, I don't want to talk about my brother's sex life? No. Why?
So a little part of me always just felt like maybe I'm a little jealous because I'm a single mom and that's something I've always desired. So I just stuff it down deep. Not with your brother, though. No, definitely not.
Okay. We're going to have to, it's going to be one of those calls. Okay. All right. Cool. So do you like hearing about, okay, this is kind of weird.
She doesn't go into details.
Okay. Okay.
I'm pretty good at changing the subject.
Okay, but are you jealous, like, she's your friend in every other way, and if this was just your regular, like, a friend from work or the neighborhood or whatever, you would, that'd be something y'all would talk about, right? How are things going in the bedroom? Like, just normal conversations. And it's just extra weird because it's your brother? Or is she just gratuitous and weird?
Probably it's weird because it's my brother.
Okay.
Because I don't have those feelings with anyone else. But also she brings it up so often.
Why? That's so weird.
I don't know. So like on Wednesday nights, we ride to church together. And so we went to church the other night and- I brought up the time change, and then she was like, oh, it gave me and your brother an extra little bit of time before the kids woke up. God.
Morning sex with your brother? That's the worst.
I just stared out the window and was like, the kids are being really loud. I can't talk right now. That's how bad my responses are getting.
I know, but okay, but here's the thing. that's super weird that she does that. It's just, just, it's just not called for. Okay. But I'm also way more concerned than that. I mean, that's just like an obtuse. I don't like, she's getting some weird thing out of that. Like whatever. But like, why won't you say, whoa, whoa, stop, stop, stop. That's my brother. I don't want to hear about that.
I think I've let it go on for over 10 years. Like she's, they've been married for, I think 13 years or something.
She's always talked about just rocking it onto to break it down with your brother.
Yeah, all the time.
Okay, you've got to just put a stop.
Every conversation. So then I didn't think it was, like, maybe I thought it was normal.
No, I go hunting with my brother-in-law. We go, like, I consider him a close friend. I don't ever talk about his sister, my wife.
Yeah.
No.
No. So then I started hanging out with her cousin, and her cousin was like, oh, I hear it all the time.
Yeah, someone just needs to tell her.
Okay. So that's where I just need to know, how do I, like, I feel like I've been in it for so long. How do I throw it out there?
I think the next, I, this is one, this is a rare one. This is one that when it comes up again, I wouldn't just throw, like, have like a big, hard conversation. I would try to keep this as light as possible. And the next time she's like, Oh, me and your brother would be like, what was, I got to stop you. I've heard so much about your sex life with my brother. I can't take it anymore.
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Chapters
4 chapters
1
How do I tell my sister-in-law to stop oversharing about her sex life?
0:05–11:15
2
Why is it uncomfortable to hear about family members' intimate lives?
11:15–20:46
3
What should I do if I feel jealous of my sister-in-law's relationship?
20:46–29:38
4
How can I communicate boundaries with my sister-in-law?
29:38–52:05