You Hit $5M, Then $10M. Why It Never Feels Like Enough (& What Actually Does)
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What triggers the feeling of never‑being‑enough despite massive success?
The biggest misconception is that success will lead to happiness. I always thought that success led to happiness. And what I realized is that it's the other way around. You increase levels of happiness even by a little bit. You become more creative and more innovative. You become more engaged. More productive. Companies that enhance levels of well being of their employees actually perform better. So there's a direct relationship between well being. and uh and profit margins.
Today I got Tall Ben Shahar with me. Some fun facts about Tall is uh he taught the most popular course at Harvard's history, uh fourteen hundred students. Israel's Israel's youngest ever national squash champion at the age of sixteen. Trained with World West uh World Wash Champion, uh, Mr. Khan at seventeen. I'm just gonna say that because that's a tough name. Uh created the world's first masters and PhD in happiness studies. Featured on sixteen minutes daily shows, CNN, uh, PBS, and Mal Robbins, who I'm a big fan of, carries a podcast, Pad W Carries a pocket pad everywhere for his daily gratitude journal. Uh I love it, man. Uh tall, I I'm really excited because I'm a business guy. Twenty years in, we'll do four hundred and ten million this year.
And every day I'm searching for the next thing as a normal entrepreneur. And you know, they say more money, more problems. I agree with that. And a lot of people th they're always saying these things like When this happens, I'll be happy. When this happens, when I get in shape, when I go on that trip. And I think that's more of a the entrepreneurial thing. But I guess let's just start out by telling us your life story and just who you are and what got you into the study of happiness.
Yeah, so what what got me into um the study of happiness is actually my own unhappiness. I was um an undergraduate at Harvard studying computer science. And I found myself In my second year doing very well academically, doing well in athletics, I played squash, um, doing uh quite well socially and yet being very unhappy. And uh Tommy, it didn't make sense to me because everything that I had learned until that point. uh told me that in order to be happy you have to succeed. You know, I have to check a few boxes, which I did. And then, you know, happiness would find its way to me. Uh that that wasn't the case. I was, you know, not depressed, but um I was uh I was very unhappy. And I remember one uh very cold Boston morning.
uh going to my academic advisor, my sophomore year, going to my academic advisor and telling her that I'm switching majors. And she said, What to? And I said, Well, I'm leaving computer science, moving over to philosophy and psychology. And she said, Why? And I said, Because I have two questions. First question, why aren't I happy? Second question, how can I become happier? And these are um, you know, the questions that have guided me for over thirty years now.
Yeah, well I think this is probably gonna be one of the best podcasts ever because I think Like I was explaining earlier that we think these things are gonna make us happy, like do doing more, getting in better shape, making more friends, becoming great especially social media makes it really tough 'cause we see the best in everybody's life and they're acting and only recording the great moments. Uh when you r you won Israel's national championship at sixteen And you said you were only happy for about three hours. And then it just went away. What tell me about that?
Yeah, so that was actually my first encounter with um or my first recognition that something was off. Um so I had trained uh very hard from uh the age of eleven. Basically the age of six or seven, I decided that I wanted to be a professional athlete. You know, sports was um was my life. At about the age of eight, I stopped growing, so um I gave up the the the basketball dream, even though I'm watching, you know, um Jalen Bronson now and I'm saying, Well, maybe Um But uh I um so I started playing squash and I dedicated everything to it. I mean hours and hours and hours a day, you know, sacrifice
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What triggers the feeling of never‑being‑enough despite massive success?
0:00–8:01
2
How did Tal Ben‑Shahar’s early unhappiness lead to the discovery of the arrival fallacy?
8:01–15:02
3
What is the SPIRE model and how does each element (Spiritual, Physical, Intellectual, Relational, Emotional) boost wellbeing?
15:02–22:25
4
Which “minimum viable interventions” can you do in 60 seconds to improve happiness right now?
22:25–30:00
5
Why do New Year’s resolutions usually fail by January 17 and how can the six‑week challenge help?
30:00–37:08
6
How do accountability buddies raise habit follow‑through by 200 % and what is the “phone‑in‑a‑box” rule?
37:08–51:36
7
Does happiness lead to success or does success create happiness – what does the research say?
51:36–1:05:28
8
What does “permission to be human” mean for high‑achievers and how can they practice the “good‑enough” life?
1:05:28–1:11:01
Speakers
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