Chapter 1: How common are workplace romances?
across the room at him us having eye contact and flirting and secretly messaging like all of that just made work so much more bearable are they hot or do you just spend five days a week eight or nine hours a day with them i took the breakup well but the seeing of the colleague afterwards was like torture man if you need something to get through the day sprinkle in a little crush that's all i'm saying
Hi, I'm Dee Salmon and there's a thief in our office. That's right.
Who? Who could it be?
I'm really pissed. I went to go have my hot cross bun. Yes, I'm having hot cross buns weeks after Easter. And I didn't have a knife on my desk. You know how we keep our cutlery on our desk because we have to because there's a bloody fucking thief.
Well, there's a shortage. Of any cutlery, any platery, any crockery in the ABC slash Triple J kitchens. Because they steal them. And, you know, we had someone come in from a different company. Let's just say a commercial company. And they were like, where are all your forks? I was like, baby.
There's a fork war happening.
Get used to it.
So I went to go have my hot cross bun. No knife on my desk where it normally sits. Someone's stolen it. So I had to use yours, which I'm probably now going to steal.
Yeah.
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Chapter 2: What are the risks of dating a coworker?
Yeah. Hi, I'm Pippa Rasmussen and I steal things from other departments.
So I'm hating on us even. You are the thief.
I don't go up to people's desks. But let me just say the fridge that's got like different department milks, it's all fair game to me. I'd be sniffing each one going, yeah, smells good. Not Triple J. Radio National, you're coming with me. That would be you. I mean. That would be you. I'm sorry. It'd be like 10 days old. You'd be like. It's honestly. It is free for all. It's hard out here.
So you've got to take what you can get in these offices. The politics of offices, honestly. We could do a whole episode on it, which we are. Yes. Kind of. Kind of. Not just offices.
Yeah.
Workplaces in general.
Yeah. In this episode, we are going to be talking about dating your, or sleeping with, your co-worker.
Yes, and we kind of got inspired by our live show, which if you haven't already watched, it's the one previous to this. It's in your feeds and you can listen to it as well wherever you get your podcasts.
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Chapter 3: What are the benefits of workplace crushes?
We had people come in with their dating dilemmas and a really common theme was hooking up with people at work. And so we were like, let's cover it.
Yeah, there were so many that we wanted to do a whole ep just for you. So in this episode, we're going to find out How common it is. What kind of relationships are you having? Is it a one night stand at the Christmas party? Is it secretly fucking? Is it your boss? Is it proper like going to management and saying, hey, we are together. Yeah.
We want to be together officially. Yeah. Something long term. Yeah. We're also going to find out how they went. Like, did it go well for you? Like, have you got a happily ever after with somebody or did it like crash and burn and you had to like leave your job?
Yeah.
It gets pretty hairy and I'm very, very excited to get into this episode. So let's do it.
So I can hear you wondering. Oh, yeah, I can hear it. She can hear it through the headphones. Through the headphones. I can hear you. I can hear you wondering. Witchy girl. How common are workplace romances? Well, we typed in the numbers.
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Chapter 4: How do workplace relationships affect professional dynamics?
Pip and I looked at a whole bunch of surveys and research and found out that on average, about 60% of people have had some sort of co-worker relationship.
Have you?
Whether it's like a hookup. Yes. Yeah. Famously, my boss, when I worked at a call center when I was like 19. Sexy. It really was. Wait, boss?
Yeah.
Well, he was like my manager. Okay. And it was basically me and the team of like eight men and all really nerdy. And we just had a bit of a flirting moment for months. And then every week we would go to office drinks on a Wednesday and flirting turned into some pashes.
But it never went any further?
No, it never went any further. Okay.
I feel like for me, I... I don't think I've ever hooked up with anyone at a workplace. But every place that I've worked has had people who are dating or shagging.
Exactly. Which is why we wanted to do this episode. Of course, we have to do our own research with you. We put up a poll on our Instagram at Triple J The Hookup. And we asked you, have you hooked up with or dated a co-worker? 62% of you said yes.
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Chapter 5: What happens when workplace romances go wrong?
By the way, I want to mention as well, get your head out of like the office space thing as well. When we talk about all these workplaces.
We've got office bias.
I think we do have an office bias, but I think remember like everyone that you're going to hear from, like they're all working in like really different jobs, like contractors, like zoos, hospo, like everything. Working in the mines, you know, whatever. Train drivers. Train drivers. We did have a few train drivers come through. So keep that in mind when you hear all these stories.
For example, Gina, I've hooked up with or dated at least one person from every job, honestly. And I'm a contractor, so that's a lot of jobs. Truthfully, a recent gig, I had four on a roster. Go off, Gina. That is crazy.
The amount of different people you would meet as a contractor. Like that is, that makes sense to me. I'm like, you're meeting so many different people, which would be exciting. And you'd be like, hey.
And it's not long term. You're literally like, this is maybe like a six month, a year contract, whatever, less. So it could be fun. Okay. So we also asked you, how did you feel about it? And a lot of people came back in the DMs at Triple J, the hookup. They said, don't screw the crew. Don't shit where you eat. And Mon said, this is my personal favorite.
Don't taste the honey where you make the money. This is really funny. We had so many different varied people come through and Adam was someone else who was different.
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Chapter 6: How do you navigate breakups with coworkers?
He said, I'm a serial co-worker upper. Almost always ends up as best friends and rarely ends badly. And I have really hot memories from my experiences. Everyone has like a thought on this and like over 60% of you have done it. Why did you want to hook up with a co-worker? This is what you had to say.
So loads of you basically said that you were having such a shit time on dating apps and trying to date in real life that you realized you're actually better off finding someone at work.
And Tom sent us a DM saying, I think people fall for people in the workplace because you might only hang out with people in your friend circles and generally those people might be similar and have similar ideas of what a normal relationship or idea of what normal is. And then you go to work and you meet many people from many different walks of life and and might have a different idea of normal.
And that draws you to that person.
Yeah. I mean, like you definitely meet a diverse range of people that you'd never find in your normal circles or your bubbles. That makes sense. Craig also says it's just easier to find someone and get to know them through work.
I actually think it's a good idea because being ex-hospitality and a chef, it was just easier to find someone you're working with because you don't have time out of work time to actually go and find someone else to date. And also when you're dating someone you're working with, I think you also get to know them better as a person.
I think it makes it a lot a bit easier, especially if you're a bit shy. I think that's a better option.
I have to say, I completely agree with Craig, but I also am like, oh, it just feels so unromantic, right? It's like, it's not the like, I saw you from across the room and I just knew. It's like, well, we spent heaps of hours together and, you know, I got to know you and you were kind of nice. So let's date.
You know what I mean?
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Chapter 7: What are the boundaries for dating in the workplace?
I hated it. I was so bored. It was torturous. And then like having a crush just got me through the day, right? It gave me a bit of dopamine. Looking across the room at him and, you know, us having sex
eye contact and flirting and secretly messaging like all of that just made work so much more bearable and so I think like in hindsight I would never have dated someone like him in the real world but it was the fact that I saw him every day he was the person that I was probably attracted to the most and it just happened to be I reckon a bit of a proximity bias.
Yeah. It's like that thing of like, are they hot or do you just spend five days a week, eight or nine hours a day with them? And that is something that so many of you were like, this is why I like dating a coworker. And this is how I ended up in this situation. Jess is someone who has such an interesting, unique story about this.
So I'm a biologist and I was working a contract where we were situated in a more remote area with a small crew of coworkers around seven of us. And we all lived on site. It honestly kind of ended up feeling like a low-budget Love Island situation. We were stuck in the middle of nowhere together near this beautiful lake, and it all kind of felt a bit magical.
And when you're around people 24-7, that proximity does a lot of the heavy lifting. Being in such a remote setting creates this little bubble or island effect that makes emotions develop way faster or feel way more intense than they normally would. And, you know, we're all young adults, a little bored. We had a day off and a couple of drinks. And, of course, something ended up happening.
That got the ball rolling and I ended up in a bit of a situationship with one of my coworkers for the whole field season.
Okay, so I would watch that show. Biology Love Island. I know.
Scientists in Love. It kind of was giving Below Deck as well. Yes. When you're in such confined spaces. Yeah.
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Chapter 8: How can you maintain a healthy relationship with a coworker?
Out at sea.
No one around.
No one around. Isolated. I mean.
Like everyone hooks up on Below Deck. If you were like a TV producer listening to us, like that is your show. We just gave it to you through Jess. But yeah, so many of you agreed with that. And sort of to your point before actually about how you were like, I would never have gotten with them if we were in real life together. Real life outside of work. Yeah.
Tia said my first girlfriend was a co-worker after quitting working there. We broke up two weeks later. So I think that's kind of a good reflection of that.
The goggles came off and you were like, actually. Yeah. Another huge reason why you like fucking or dating your co-workers is because you're It's kind of hot. It's so hot.
Are you kidding?
The taboo forbiddenness of it. The secret glances across the room. The messaging on Teams. The elevator kiss. It's honestly everyone's wet dream. And this is what we heard from you as well. Brooke said, literally was like a romance book or a movie. It was the maintenance guy. We had a secret code ready for the milkshake. Then we'd hook up in various rooms around the building.
It was a good couple of years.
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