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The Totally Football Show with James Richardson

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Episodes

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Matching pink Ferraris

25 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

98/99 brought us the highest quality of title races, John Gregory’s big mouth, and Van Hooijdonk and Di Canio behaving badly.We look back at the sec...

Sausage factory owner

21 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The 01/02 campaign saw Real Madrid win their 9th European Cup at the expense of Bayer Leverkusen, who knocked out all three English clubs on the way t...

Conglomerate striker

18 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The panel look back at the 97/98 season. Home to one of the best individual performances of the Premier League era. And the most bizarre managerial un...

More centimetres to score

14 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The panel look back at Bayern’s first European Cup win in 25 years. It was the final with all the penalties, so naturally the Germans won it. Featur...

Football with broccoli

10 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Back in 1996/97, there was an Italian influx, Manchester United were the worst champions ever and Leeds experienced peak George Graham. Plus there was...

After 90 minutes of sheer hell

07 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The Champions League season at the turn of the century was lit up by Batistuta’s Fiorentina, Mihajlovic’s Lazio and Flo’s Chelsea.The whole thin...

Get a Wim Jonk while you’re at it

03 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The 94/95 season saw Shearer and Sutton fire Blackburn to their first title in 81 years. And Forest finished 3rd! The panel look back on a game-changi...

Airplanes in the belly

30 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

98/99 is defined by Man United’s treble success. We force Rafa to relive the United Bayern final - the substitutions that went right and the substit...

Blobby In, Branfoot Out

26 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

United’s second season in the Premier League wasn’t so difficult as they crushed all opposition in 93/94. Were they better than the United side of...

Club of the humble

23 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Jupp Heynckes’s Real, thanks to the heroics of Predrag Mijatovic and Christian Karembeu, turned over Juve in the final, at the end of a scintillatin...

Current wine importer

19 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The 2011/12 Premier League campaign saw Manchester City pip rivals United to the title on goal difference on the last day. You might remember how it e...

The human can opener

16 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The panel travel back to 96/97 when Dortmund and Schalke did a European double. Dortmund’s only Champions League success powered by Sammer, Ricken a...

Eight more votes than Theo Zagorakis

12 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Roman Abramovich arrived in England but nobody could beat Arsenal in the Premier League in 03/04. Do they – or indeed Thierry Henry – get enough l...

Snake power rankings

09 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

We travel back in time to the 95/96 season of the Champions League which gives us a chance to rave about Raul. It was a disastrous campaign for Blackb...

Division One rolled in glitter

05 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Today, the panel look back to 92-93, the very first Premier League campaign that saw Manchester United’s dominance commence and Clough’s last knoc...

Like a luxury Stewart Downing

02 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Flicks and Kicks sees the team review United Passions – the FIFA-funded film about FIFA with Tim Roth starring as Saint Sepp Blatter.With Kane’s f...

Die Hard henchman

30 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

PSG had a team to drool over, Milan were permanent fixtures in the final. But 94/95 was arguably Louis Van Gaal’s finest season as a manager, leadin...

Dawn of the dour

29 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The 04/05 season saw Chelsea end Arsenal and United’s dominance of English football, plus the greatest relegation battle ever. Also big that season ...

Baked bean cake

26 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Today we take on the film Escape To Victory, where football and POW camps collide. Starring Michael Caine, Sylvester Stallone, Pele, John Wark and tha...

Volcanic characters

24 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The panel look back at the 93-94 Champions League, a place in which was turned down by PSG!Featuring Capello’s Milan, Cruyff’s Barcelona, Wenger’...

I’m a butterfly, you’re worker ants

23 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Keegan’s entertainers up against Fergie’s fledglings. We review one of the great title races in a campaign where English clubs were rubbish in Eur...

Pat Jennings’s oil filters

19 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Rory Smith is back to bring us an update on the latest moves within UEFA, as to how to salvage the season.On the agenda today, we offer up a Ronaldinh...

A few transfusions

17 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

We look back at the first Champions League final in 1993, which pitted Berlusconi against the Berlusconi who got busted. Milan versus Bernard Tapie’...

Couldn’t defend for butter

16 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

With all major European leagues suspending football amid the coronavirus pandemic, we discuss with Rory Smith where the authorities go from here and w...

Elongated Lionel Messi

12 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Last year’s Champions League finalists Liverpool and Tottenham are both knocked out at the last 16 stage. Where did it go wrong for the Reds? And ar...

Qatar karma

10 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Like many games this week, PSG v Dortmund will be behind closed doors. Can the Parisians end their knock-out stage hoodoo? And will Atletico upset hol...

Clown running through a minefield

09 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

It’s another man of the match display from the boy wonder Billy Gilmour at Stamford Bridge. Are Man City missing Arteta?We recognise Roy Hodgson’s...

Siegfried Sassoon vibe

05 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Tottenham head out of the cup as Eric Dier heads into the stands to confront a fan. We ask if Spurs should be expecting a bit more from the rather exp...

I’m not the midfielder you’re looking for

03 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Real Madrid win the Clasico, leading many to assume Barcelona – and Lionel Messi – are in decline.Lazio are top of Serie A but is the Italian seas...

Defence and justice

02 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The bottom 3 all taste victory in the Premier League. Emma Saunders pops in to discuss whether Watford’s win over the champions elect is the greates...

Driving through the smoke

27 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Man City make a statement in Europe with their win at the Bernabeu – next up Aston Villa in the Carabao Cup Final.Chelsea are embarrassed by Bayern ...

The most important of the least important things

25 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Will Bayern and Juve show they deserve to be among the favourites for the Champions League this week? Can a resurgent Napoli upset Barca? And will Rea...

An abject lack of responsibility

24 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

There’s refereeing controversy in Burnley, Nottingham and Inverness, to name but a few. In the Premier League, there are plaudits aplenty for Saka, ...

Niche beef

20 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Liverpool and Tottenham are both undone in Europe, both posing very little goal threat. The same can’t be said of Erling Haaland at Dortmund. Just h...

Full gas

18 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Will Dortmund v PSG deliver the goal-fest we all expect? Do Leipzig have the experience to progress? And what are the prospects for Atalanta and Atlet...

Very particular about his black Diadoras

17 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Kieran Maguire from the Price of Football helps us discuss the ramifications of Manchester City’s two-year ban from the Champions League, with 5th b...

86 different pairs of shorts

13 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Can Norwich add champions elect Liverpool to their list of Carrow Road scalps? Will Wolves and Leicester feature in one of the games of the season? An...

Put him in the fridge

11 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Inter come from behind to win the Milan derby and go top of Serie A. Could the consequences be serious for Sarri at Juventus?Are Dortmund fed up of Fa...

Gusty movements

09 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Everton are flying under Ancelotti but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t big up Big Dunc and pick on Pickford. Sheffield United are back in the spotl...

Electric shock salsa

06 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

We look ahead to the first half of Matchweek 26 in the Premier League with a six-pointer at the bottom, plus an ageing Palace looking to get back on t...

It makes a hell of a cocktail

04 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Kylian in the name of? What's gone on with Tuchel and Mbappe?Is Haaland scoring enough goals?Which Spanish manager has transformed over the years?And ...

Regrettable

03 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Liverpool are 22 points clear at the top of the table and could win the title in the Merseyside derby. Why are Manchester City so wasteful? At the oth...

A Hotel Babylon vibe

30 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

There’s the League Cup semi-finals, Premier League weekend and closing of the transfer window to be discussed. Plus Pacman, Thames AFC and Salomon K...

Mountaineering metaphors

28 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Atletico Madrid have slumped under Simeone, as La Liga as a whole asks where have all the goals gone?Germany, that’s where. And that was even before...

His legs are human legs

27 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Shrewsbury force a replay with Liverpool thanks to the “Poundshop Jamie Vardy.” But did Jurgen Klopp go too far with his post-match statement that...

Vortex of heritage

23 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

There’s not a lot of love for Solskjaer after Manchester United’s home humbling to Burnley at Old Trafford. But we are singing the praises of Gabr...

Like the T-Rex in Jurassic Park

21 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Erling Haaland scores 3 on his Dortmund debut, but it’s Timo Werner who’s the top scorer in the Bundesliga.16 year-old Rayan Cherki scores twice a...

Unserious football individual

20 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Liverpool take a step closer to the title and Bournemouth a step closer to the drop. Plus we discuss Gary Cahill’s comeback, Pepe Reina’s hotel ro...

Younger than Damon Albarn

16 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER:  • PART 1: FA Cup 4th round replay reaction (01m 00s) • PART 2: Arsenal v Sheff Utd preview with James Shield from The Star, She...

When there is no structure, there’s chaos

14 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Valverde is shown the door at Barcelona. Does the club’s courting of Xavi, Koeman and Pochettino show they don’t really know what they’re doing?...

The barrier to fun

13 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER:  • PART 1: Tottenham 0-1 Liverpool (02m 00s) • PART 2: Aston Villa 1-6 Man City (15m 00s)• PART 3a: Bournemouth 0-3 Watford &a...

Villain in a Playstation 3 game

09 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER:  • PART 1: Man Utd 1-3 Man City & Leicester 1-1 Aston Villa (01m 00s) • PART 2: Arsenal 1-0 Leeds + FA Cup 4th round draw (1...

We can’t have nice things, can we?

06 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER:  • PART 1: The magic of the cup? (01m 00s) • PART 2a: Brighton 0-1 Sheff Wed & Liverpool 1-0 Everton (05m 00s)• PART 2b: M...

A joke football club run by clowns

02 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER:  • PART 1: More football on the telly? (01m 00s) • PART 2a: Arsenal 2-0 Man Utd (03m 30s)• PART 2b: Southampton 1-0 Tottenham ...

Head canon

30 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER:  • PART 1: Carl Anka’s origin story (01m 00s) • PART 2a: Arsenal 1-2 Chelsea (03m 00s)• PART 2b: Burnley 0-2 Man Utd (11m 00...

Quelled

27 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: A powerful walk and Jose’s dog (01m 00s) • PART 1b: Leicester 0 - 4 Liverpool (03m 30s)• PART 2a: Chelsea 0 - 2 So...

Bring The Noise - Rafa Honigstein on Klopp

24 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Nick Miller speaks to Rafa Honigstein about the updated edition of his magnificent biography of Jurgen Klopp.  What makes the manager of the current ...

Their heads just fell off

23 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER:  • PART 1: Game of the weekend? (01m 00s) • PART 2a: Racist abuse at the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium (03m 00s)• PART 2b: Tottenh...

Diet Pep? Sí

19 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: Little cookies big trouble in little Ostersunds (01m 00s) • PART 1b: Arteta and Ancelotti's imminent appointments (04m...

Schumacher + De Jong

17 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

There’s a Clasico to look forward to and a Champions League draw to react to. Do so in the company of Jimbo, James Horncastle, Alvaro Romeo, Rafa Ho...

Dog bites man

16 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: Arsenal 0 - 3 City (02m 20s) • PART 1b: DNA managers and Ozil v China (09m 00s)• PART 2a: Vincent Janssen and The Li...

Economic stratification and an alpaca-walking rosette

12 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: Atalanta and other CL headlines (01m 30s) • PART 1b: What next for Ancelotti? (08m 30s)• PART 1c: And more CL headli...

We’ll need a big stick against this wolf

10 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Jimbo, James Horncastle, Raphael Honigstein, Alvaro Romeo and Julien Laurens look back at a super significant weekend and look ahead to the final week...

22:44

09 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1: City 1 - 2 United (02m 00s) • PART 2a: Everton 3 - 1 Chelsea (09m 00s)• PART 2b: Watford 0 - 0 Palace (17m 00s)• PA...

The Daddy, with special guest Jamie Carragher

05 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: Karaoke with Jamie Carragher (01m 00s) • PART 1b: Liverpool 5 - 2 Everton (04m 00s)• PART 1c: How to fix Everton (10...

Just push, Mrs Thuram

03 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Big guns fail to fire across Europe as Jimbo, Julien Laurens, James Horncastle, Alvaro Romeo and Raphael Honigstein review the weekend’s action in t...

So cruel, so often

02 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: QSF out at Watford…again (01m 00s) • PART 1b: Emery out, Freddie in at Arsenal - and the 2-2 with Norwich (06m 30s)•...

If it’s tomorrow where you are

28 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: Champions League headlines: Lewy, Lukaku and more (01 m 30s) • PART 1b: On Spurs, Mou and Bournemouth (08m 00s)• PAR...

The emotional piano

26 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Jimbo, James Horncastle, Raphael Honigstein, Alvaro Romeo and Julien Laurens are back to look ahead to matchday 5 of the Champions League.PSG travel t...

Kloppage time

25 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1: West Ham 2 - 3 Spurs (01m 30s) • PART 2a: Palace 1 - 2 Liverpool (09m 00s)• PART 2b: City 2 - 1 Chelsea (11m 30s)• ...

Twinkling

21 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1: West Ham v Spurs preview (02m 00s) • PART 2a: City v Chelsea preview (14m 00s)• PART 2b: Palace v Liverpool (17m 00s)...

The Poch putsch

20 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1: Poch out, Mou in (01m 00s) • PART 2: A word from the fans - with Pete Haine from the Tottenham Supporters’ Trust (07m...

A hibernating bear’s faecal plug

18 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: Yet more tales from the Opta Quiz (01m 00s) • PART 1b: Euro 2020 headlines (02m 30s)• PART 1c: Wales v Hungary previ...

Sometimes you need that tension

14 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: Tales from the Opta Quiz (01m 00s) • PART 1b: England v Montenegro and Sterling v Gomez (03m 40s)• PART 2a: Wales an...

He punches you right in the face for 90 minutes

12 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Jimbo, James Horncastle, Julien Laurens, Raphael Honigstein and Alvaro Romeo review a big weekend around Europe.The cycle appears to be coming to an e...

Gazing on like sheep being herded up a field

11 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: The greatest goal ever witnessed lived by Michael Cox (01m 00s) • PART 1b: Liverpool 3 - 1 City (03m 00s)• PART 2a: ...

Essentially like Phil Collins

07 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: Chelsea 4 - 4 Ajax (02m 20s) • PART 1b: Red Star 0 - 4 Spurs (09m 30s)• PART 1c: More CL headlines  (13m 30s)• PA...

They did a Niall Quinn

05 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

The Champions League is back but the big guns are failing to fire – it’s the Totally Football Show – the full continental.Jimbo, James Horncastl...

Chaos theory on legs

04 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: City 2 - 1 Southampton(01m 30s) • PART 1b: Villa 1 - 2 Liverpool (06m 30s)• PART 2a: West Ham 2 - 3 Newcastle (13m 0...

Digweed

31 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1: Liverpool 5 - 5 Arsenal (01m 30s) • PART 2a: On Xhaka and Arsenal v Wolves preview (12m 00s)• PART 2b: City v Saints ...

Dude, where’s my lange?

29 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Jimbo, James Horncastle, Julien Laurens, Raphael Honigstein and Alvaro Romeo are back with the Totally Football Show (European edition).There are some...

Three distinct noises

28 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1: Liverpool 2 - 1 Spurs (01m 30s) • PART 2: Southampton 0 - 9 Leicester - with Carl Anka (11m 30s)• PART 3a: Burnley 2 ...

Your garden

24 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Jimbo is joined by Frida Fagerlund, Jack Lang and Tom Williams for reaction to this weeks Champions League action. There's also an in-depth Premier Le...

One Berti is already enough

22 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Jimbo, James Horncastle, Julien Laurens and Raphael Honigstein delve deep into Dortmund’s trip to Inter Milan. Will Jadon Sancho be allowed off the ...

VAR-sectomy

21 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: PART 1: Michael Cox's kick offs (01m 40s) PART 2a: Man Utd 1-1 Liverpool  (03m 00s)PART 2b: Crystal Palace 0-2 Man City  (10m 10s)P...

Ketchup everywhere

17 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1: Ronaldo v Kevin Nolan and compound interest v Alexis Sanchez (01m 00s) • PART 2a: Euro 2020 qualifiers headlines (03m 0...

Ukrainian phonetics for David Pleat

14 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1: Carl Barat v Earl Barrett  (01m 00s) • PART 2a: Czech Republic 2 - 1 England and memories of Sven (03m 10s)• PART 2b...

Rabbit, some Pot Noodles and a lobster

10 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1: It’s..........Rebekah Vardy’s account (01m 00s) • PART 2a: International headlines (05m 30s)• PART 2b: Northern I...

The methodology meeting

08 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

If you’re looking for an actual title race, Jimbo and co have you covered with the goings on around Europe’s major leagues.Monchengladbach are top...

The class of yada yada yada

07 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: City 0 - 2 Wolves (02m 20s) • PART 1b: Liverpool 2 - 1 Leicester (08m 00s)• PART 2a: Brighton 3 - 0 Spurs (11m 30s)•...

A freezer full of mince

03 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1: Spurs 2 - 7 Bayern - with Dan Kilpatrick (02m 20s) • PART 2: Liverpool v Leicester preview (18m 50s)• PART 3a: The Ph...

This elephant was not for dying

01 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Jimbo, James Horncastle, Julien Laurens, Raphael Honigstein and Alvaro Romeo review the latest from around Europe and examine a Champions League week ...

Chased by peacocks as a child

30 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: Michael Cox the manager  (01m 00s) • PART 1b: Sheff U 0 - 1 Liverpool (02m 40s)• PART 1c: Everton 1 - 3 City (09m 0...

Would autumn happen all the same?

26 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1: EFL Cup round-up (01m 00s) • PART 2a: Man U v Arsenal preview (12m 40s)• PART 2b: A bad week for Spurs (17m 10s)• P...

The Apple of football

24 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

It’s the Totally Football Show European edition as Jimbo, James Horncastle, Alvaro Romeo, Julien Laurens and Raphael Honigstein dissect another huge...

Death by good taste

23 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: City 8 - 0 Watford (02m 00s) • PART 1b: Chelsea 1 - 2 Liverpool (13m 00s)• PART 1c: On VAR and more (18m 30s)• PAR...

The mysterious fish

19 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: General knowledge (hard) quiz questions and mascot chat (01m 00s) • PART 1b: PSG 3 - 0 Real - with Tom Williams (07m 0...

They’re not fish, they’re not meat

17 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Jimbo, James Horncastle, Julien Laurens, Raphael Honigstein and Alvaro Romeo review the latest from around Europe and look ahead to the return of the ...

Lie back and think of Steve Bruce

16 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1: Norwich 3 - 2 City - with Ffion Thomas (01m 00s) • PART 2a: Liverpool 3 - 1 Newcastle (10m 40s)• PART 2b: Wolves 2 - ...

Family members

12 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

RUNNING ORDER: • PART 1a: England 5 - 3 Kosovo (02m 40s) • PART 1c: A word on Germany’s travails (09m 30s) • PART 2a: A brief history pod L...

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