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The Viall Files

E1038 Ask Nick - My BFF Is Pregnant With My Ex

24 Nov 2025

Transcription

Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?

0.807 - 21.364 Natalie

At this stage of my life, I really focus on my sleep and my quality of sleep and romanticizing the small things in life, like going to bed early and my nighttime routine. And that is always going to include a pair of Skims pajamas because they are so soft. They feel like butter on your skin. They come in so many different colors. styles and colors and designs.

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21.645 - 30.719 Natalie

And they're not even just good for like sleeping. Like they're good for all day lounging. I love to get ready for bed at around six o'clock and then put the baby to bed and then just like lounge and sit and be cozy and comfortable.

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Chapter 2: What relationship advice does Nick give to a caller wanting marriage?

30.739 - 43.518 Natalie

You'll find me all season long in my skims. They have so many cute prints for holidays. If you are anyone in my family, stop listening right now because you will be receiving one for Christmas. You can shop My Favorite Pajamas at Skims.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you.

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43.558 - 54.455 Natalie

Select podcast in the survey and be sure to select our show in the drop down menu that follows. And if you're looking for the perfect gift for everyone on your list, the Skims Holiday Shop is now open at Skims.com.

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54.475 - 64.851 Nick Viall

It's that time of year from family gatherings around a warm fireplace to catching up over your favorite peppermint mocha. Together is the best place to be. This episode is sponsored by Starbucks.

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64.932 - 86.224 Natalie

I have to say, every time I drink a peppermint mocha around the holidays, it always reminds me of when my family, after Thanksgiving, the Friday after Thanksgiving, we always go downtown Savannah. We walk the little Riverside Market. There's always a Starbucks there. Grab our drinks. Yeah, you get your hot peppermint mocha. It's cold. You're cozy. You're with family. It's fun.

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86.264 - 87.987 Natalie

It's one of my favorite traditions.

88.034 - 89.977 Nick Viall

Delicioso. It tastes like Christmas.

90.257 - 99.33 Natalie

It does. It's the most nostalgic feeling ever to like be chilly outside. You have a hot Starbucks holiday drink and you're like with your family. There's nothing better.

99.43 - 126.263 Nick Viall

Well, we love family time with a warm drink in our hands. Share the season with the peppermint mocha or caramel brulee latte from Starbucks. What's going on, everybody? Welcome back to another exciting episode of the Vow Files Ask Nick edition.

Chapter 3: How should one handle a friend getting pregnant by an ex?

126.523 - 145.968 Nick Viall

I am your host, Nick. I am joined by the household in this special edition of Ask Nick. Well, it's holiday season. We got Thanksgiving coming up this week, and we thought we'd bring the household in to just talk a little holiday magic, you know? spend time with each other. That's what the holidays are all about in the household. You guys are like family to us, the people listening.

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146.028 - 152.534 Nick Viall

And I just wanted to bring in the household. My wife is here, Natalie. I think this is one of your first Ask Nick's, I mean, intros at least.

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152.755 - 155.077 Natalie

I've done, I think a couple before. Okay.

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155.097 - 165.987 Nick Viall

We just want to get you guys into the holiday spirit, you know, like you're about to embark on some family time and hopefully that's going to be enjoyable for you. But like sometimes like everything else, it's almost like improv.

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Chapter 4: What insights are shared about navigating awkward friendships?

166.007 - 169.83 Nick Viall

You have to do a little warm up, you know, when it comes to being with family.

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169.81 - 177.281 Natalie

Yes, and? And before I let Nick get to his callers, I thought it would be really fun for us to play a little game of This or That, sponsored by Starbucks.

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177.622 - 189.54 Unknown

Yeah, I don't know about you guys, but my family, we take games very seriously. Yeah. There's always a game going on. During the holidays, me and my family get into it. It gets pretty crazy. It gets competitive. It's a Globerman household. Mm.

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189.52 - 210.043 Nick Viall

Well, we're going to play a little game of this or that, like Natalie said, and here's how it's going to work. We're going to go round table, have our this or that, you know, hot or cold, you know, snowy or not snowy. And then for the rest of the household, and if you are listening, you want to join along, you're welcome. But if you agree with the person asking the question, you take a sip.

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210.023 - 222.187 Nick Viall

of your favorite coffee drink. We're going to be drinking our Starbucks holiday drinks. If you want to play along, press pause right now, pull into your local Starbucks, grab your favorite holiday drink. I'm drinking the peppermint mocha. Natalie, also peppermint mocha?

222.207 - 226.255 Natalie

No, no, no, no. I'm a caramel brulee. Oh, caramel brulee. Caramel brulee latte kind of girl.

226.275 - 229.903 Unknown

Leah and I are also popping off with art. Caramel burlesque.

230.424 - 238.663 Nick Viall

I guess I'm just a classic man, you know? I'm going with the old faithful, but super reliable. Okay, are we ready to kick off this or that holiday style sponsored by Starbucks?

238.964 - 240.067 Unknown

Let's rock and roll.

Chapter 5: How can someone address a partner's kissing skills?

270.93 - 272.734 Unknown

You can't help yourself. I'm going to drink every time.

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272.854 - 273.215 Natalie

I know.

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273.315 - 281.953 Unknown

It's so good. Okay, wait, wait, wait. So stuffing or green bean casserole? Green bean casserole all day, every day. Green bean casserole for sure.

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281.973 - 286.082 Nick Viall

I'd go green bean casserole. I don't stuff a stuffing.

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286.062 - 303.97 Unknown

I love stuffing. I love stuffing. But like the little French fried onions you put on top of a green bean casserole. You kidding me? So good. You kidding me? So good. I like when the stuffing gets like overdone and it's crispy. Okay. I have a really good one because I literally contemplate with this every single day of my life. Iced or hot?

304.631 - 307.075 Nick Viall

Always hot. I'll get hot in 95 degree weather.

307.055 - 324.068 Unknown

I am the same way. And the holiday is definitely hot. I always want hot. I'm iced most of the time, but occasionally it is like a holiday drink. I do like a mocha. An iced mocha doesn't feel right in my soul. I have to get like a steamy hot mocha.

324.048 - 333.098 Natalie

Well, peppermint mocha or caramel brulee latte. I'm definitely, you can't, you have to agree with me and drink. You're just forgetting the rules and you're just drinking your coffee.

333.118 - 337.222 Nick Viall

That's good. I made up the rules anyways. Who cares?

Chapter 6: What are the implications of being financially supportive in a relationship?

486.479 - 488.481 Unknown

And the holidays also always feel nostalgic.

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488.541 - 489.602 Nick Viall

Shopping and coffee.

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489.642 - 490.944 Unknown

No better combo.

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490.964 - 503.797 Nick Viall

Literally. It's the, it's the best combo in the world. Well, thanks for playing along. Hope you enjoyed this holiday segment. Don't forget to get your Starbucks drinks this holiday season. Now it's time to get to our first caller. How's it going?

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504.558 - 511.785 Lindsay

Hi, I'm Kate. I'm 25 years old. And how do I convince my boyfriend that it's time to get married?

511.934 - 523.792 Nick Viall

Okay. Why do you have to convince him? Well, I guess let's start with why do you feel like you're ready? And despite him not being ready, why do you feel like he should still ask you?

524.333 - 549.025 Lindsay

Yeah, we've been together for seven years. So I just feel like time is of the essence now. And so we started dating when we were 18. And now we're 25. And I have a house. He primarily lives with me. You own the house? Yeah, I own the house.

549.085 - 550.988 Nick Viall

What do you mean by he primarily lives with you?

553.092 - 559.123 Lindsay

He stays there like five nights a week and then like one or two nights he goes back to his place.

Chapter 7: How can one support a partner's career aspirations?

679.095 - 688.944 Nick Viall

Okay. What if he was just like, Hey, like, listen, I just, the idea that you're my only girlfriend and the only person I hooked up with kind of freaks me out. What if he told you that?

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689.685 - 698.473 Lindsay

Yeah. I mean, I guess I would understand where he's coming from, but I mean, I feel like if you got it right on the first try, that's great.

0

698.521 - 711.383 Nick Viall

Yeah, I mean, listen, I just don't, I mean, the thing is, is like, I totally get where you're coming from, right? These seven years, it's a long time. You're pretty content with the relationship. I don't mean content in a bad way. I just mean like, you're just, it sounds like you're really happy with how things are.

0

711.423 - 724.765 Nick Viall

And yeah, as a 25 year old, dating a guy for seven years, like if I'm in your position, I would, the logical next step would be to want this. For whatever reason, he doesn't.

0

725.386 - 751.342 Nick Viall

yet um why is he not ready right yeah there's got to be a thing an actual tangible thing whether he is aware of it or not but he probably is that like that's stopping him from being like this is the woman i want to marry like that we you know i love her like the only thing i want that i know i want in my life is her And he lacks that certainty.

751.943 - 776.74 Nick Viall

I don't know where you live, where your community is, and what the people around you are doing with their lives. But in general, our society is settling down later in life. And having dated someone since you were 18 and staying together only to get married is less common than it is common these days. It used to be more common back in the day. So...

776.72 - 783.412 Nick Viall

It might just be as simple as that, where he's just, he's not sure what he wants to do with his life. You know, where is he in his career?

783.472 - 811.215 Lindsay

So that's kind of another point of contention a little bit. I'm the breadwinner in the relationship, which that's not like anything that I'm upset about by any means. Like I'm totally secure in my career, but Um, he's in the interview process right now for like a full-time job, but the last couple of years, um, he, he does videography.

811.315 - 821.328 Lindsay

So it's kind of just like weddings and gigs and social media stuff for other people. Um, and then he bartends at a local restaurant too.

Chapter 8: What does Nick suggest when a partner feels unready for commitment?

942.793 - 956.205 Nick Viall

And then you guys start having kids. All of a sudden, you're the breadwinner. You're like, well, you be a stay-at-home dad. And I don't know. Maybe he's down for that. Maybe he's not, right? But it could be coming from that place, right? That he hasn't really...

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956.455 - 982.27 Nick Viall

figured his shit out yet and I think there's a desire for people to want to do that before they quote unquote settle down because there's definitely this idea that once I do that like you kind of lock into the life that is Now, that doesn't have to be the case. You could be a supportive partner and just say, hey, I don't know. I would ask him what his dreams are. What does he want to do?

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982.31 - 1012.467 Nick Viall

How can I support his dreams? I don't know. You guys should be asking each other that. But if that's the case, if that's what's going on, it might make him feel more secure to choose a life with you if he feels like you really have his back. And that you are interested in hearing the things he aspires to do and be for himself. And that he would have your support.

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1013.288 - 1035.366 Nick Viall

Maybe he wanted to go back to school. I don't know. I don't know. But part-time freelance videography work and bartending. is probably, I'm guessing, hopes to accomplish more than that on an individual basis. Do you have any idea what some of his professional dreams and aspirations are?

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1035.565 - 1060.729 Lindsay

Yeah, I think he would love to do just like anything social media for businesses or videography. He's kind of passionate about that. Yeah, I guess maybe like to be more clear, he's loved like he's done a lot of concert videography. And so he also loves the idea of travel with that.

1060.945 - 1080.905 Nick Viall

Still kind of vague, you know? I mean, I'm not critiquing your answer. I'm just like, if that's all you, you know, if he's telling me that, I'd have been like, well, that's not, like, if you like, great, you like videography, you like social media, you want to do something in the content creation, you know, do you want to start your own business? Do you want to, who do you want to serve?

1080.985 - 1103.472 Nick Viall

Is it like, you know, you mentioned weddings, is it small businesses? Like, do you want to start your own company? Like the idea of travel? I mean, I guess, sure, you know, depends on- You know, for vacations or for work, traveling for work, it's pretty old, pretty fast. Yeah. You know, but like, I'm not, you know, listen, at 25 years old. I mean, I was 25.

1103.612 - 1124.061 Nick Viall

I didn't know what I wanted to do with my life. And that was 20 years ago. And I think a lot of young people, Gen Z, so to speak, are maturing and growing up later in life. You're ahead of the curve. You got your house. You sound like you have a job that you enjoy. You're making good money. That's partly why you're so ready.

1124.041 - 1148.462 Nick Viall

you know because you're like i my logical next step for me is to get married and have kids you know i don't know if you want to have kids but you know um but for him he he's just like i don't know man you know and i think that's probably your biggest hurdle and so that's not to say you have to wait till he figures it out because hell he might not figure it out for 10 years

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