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Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
Recorded live in Austin, Texas, USA. It's the William Montgomery Show. Starring William Montgomery. With the Tony Chin Orchestra. The William Montgomery Junior Dancers. This week, Rattlesnake Dave. A performance by the Great Gorbini. And a mysterious loaf of raisin bread. And now, here he is, the big red machine, the Memphis Strangler, William Montgomery! We are up at Grant.
We have made it on this Tuesday, what, end of January. It was my birthday yesterday.
Happy birthday.
Thank you. I didn't know that. I know. I turned 39. So one year. How old are you again, Grant? 43. Okay. Yeah. You're just a little older. When you turned 40, did you notice things were different when you hit 40? Or no, it's a slow kind of change that you feel throughout your life. Yeah.
I think it's still a milestone that you're aware of. Like, oh, I remember, like, my dad, when he had his 40th, there were all those, like, shirts people were wearing back then. It was like over the hill. Is that 40?
I always thought that was like 50 or 60.
Or is that 40? Is over the hill 40? I feel like maybe back then they just died earlier. I don't know. Why did it have an over the hill for 40? But it does make you kind of think, oh, this is like, what, like a halfway point of your life? Yeah.
Grant, I was about to ask you, so what do you think? Because when I hit 35, I was thinking, well, William, this easily, I mean, who knows? I mean, I could be already almost done with my life. We just have no idea. One foot in the grave, man.
It gets kind of weird because, yeah, at 40, you're like, well, this is very easily halfway, maybe a little more, maybe a little less than halfway, but we're probably halfway now. Right.
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Chapter 2: What reflections does William have about turning 40?
They kind of deserve it. I know certain people do. God, another person got shot. That last video was kind of nutty, wasn't it? Yikes. It's pretty messed up. Yeah. Dear Lord. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. I was watching that. Then, yeah, that's all a giant disaster. Yeah. Everything's falling apart in Minneapolis right now, it seems like.
Yeah. Like we here in Texas, a lot of people have have guns. And that's been like this whole like you should be able to go wherever and like have a gun on you. And for sure, I thought that was always a gun away and then just shot him.
Yes. I always thought that was a big tenant being able to have the guns. Now, obviously, if I'm out there, I'm not even being out there because I'm a big coward. You know what I mean? And I don't. Also, it's cold. It's very cold. But yes. Oh, my gosh. So very scary stuff happening around. But we keep moving forward. And now I'm almost 40 or over 40. We're we're just moving forward.
We're going to be nice to people.
We're going to try and be nice, I suppose.
We're going to try to be really nice to people. We're going to watch the news and be very careful about what's going on, but try not to let it totally mess up our days all the time. It's hard. It's hard.
Yes, it's very hard. The news is just unrelentingly just bad.
Yeah, oh my gosh. And I get on my Reddit. I love Reddit. And I can look up my certain video games on there and stuff. But yeah, all the other stuff, I click on it and then it's just all... Yeah, it's two sides. And I would tend to think, Grant, that the real people in power on either side love all of the little plebeians like us just fighting, right?
Because then they can keep on stealing the money. Isn't this kind of the general idea, probably?
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Chapter 3: What insights does William share about aging and life milestones?
They could keep on doing whatever they're doing. Insider trading, all this stuff. Oh my gosh, I used to follow. I didn't ever follow, but I think it would have been fun. I always heard that there was the stock tracker for Nancy Pelosi and you could see what stock moves she did. Oh, right, right. Because she would do all the insider. And that's both sides. I know they're doing insider trading.
Yeah, she made a bunch of money. It was messed up.
I know. It's all. So everybody, be careful. But yeah, it seems like a pretty tumultuous time right now. So I don't know. Make some. You know what I would think? You know what I did the other night, Grant? What? I made some macaroni and cheese and happened to have a little heavy whipping cream in the refrigerator. And I put that in along with my 2% milk. And Grant, it was a good bowl of macaroni.
I bet it's like that makes it just like really creamy sauce.
Oh, I love it. Then I eat that with my peanut butter crackers and chug water in between. It was very nice.
Well, we had our semi-annual big freeze here in Austin or in Texas. Did you get hit by it?
Yes, got hit by it, and I was trapped. I couldn't leave yesterday, Grant, even if I wanted to, because the stairs leading up to the apartment were solid blocks of ice because the stairs don't get hit by the sun. So I was trapped all day yesterday on my birthday, which was totally fine. I was able to play my little video games and relax, but I was trapped the entire time. Jeez.
Yeah, it was kind of bad. And then I was putting some hot water on it yesterday. But then I'm thinking, wait, am I being an idiot? Am I just creating a whole bunch of extra ice when it gets real cold tonight? And I think that's what I did. I think I made it way more treacherous. So I don't know, because I wanted to get I wanted to get a blizzard last night. I was in the mood for a blizzard.
Really surrounded by ice. And you're like, you know what? This reminds me.
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Chapter 4: What are William's thoughts on current news cycles?
Because he skied and one of those things just took his head off. And I think, man, I bet that was a gory looking scene in the snow. God. Could you imagine?
Yeah, I guess the ice probably, you know, stopped the bleeding pretty quickly, though.
Oh, yeah. I didn't even think about that. Yeah, I guess maybe if he got his head cut off and then he kind of did it. Like he was going to do a face plant, but his head's not there anymore. So it was just stub or stump or whatever gets to the stone. Maybe that would stop it. I never even thought about that. Maybe it wasn't actually as gory as I was always picturing.
I mean, brutal, but maybe less gory. Not just blood everywhere. Yikes. But like the scene of Fargo with the wood chipper and just blood spraying out everywhere.
I love that. Oh, my gosh. That's what I was picturing, Grant. I think the most starstruck I ever was when I lived in Los Angeles was at the Buffalo Wild Wings on Hollywood by where I was living. And one day I was with one of my buddies. We're just drinking, eating wings. And I look behind me and it's that guy. sitting right behind me with his wife and daughter.
And I wanted to say, oh my gosh, I'm the biggest fan. I think you play a wonderful, creepy, scary person. But I didn't have the nerve. What is that guy's name?
What is that actor's name?
Peter Stormare, I believe. I think that guy's great. He's amazing. And in Fargo, that's one of my favorite movies. He doesn't even talk a lot, but I think that even makes it better. It makes him even more creepy or more menacing or something because he's not even talking the whole time.
With him and Buscemi?
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Chapter 5: What are the challenges William faces in his comedy career?
It's somebody in the family. It's not a foreign faction. It's somebody in that family. But this person made a very, I would say it sounded very reasonable of the boy. The little boy did it. And the parents covered up for him? Yes. And then the freaking mom finds it and then writes that insane note because it's the mom who obviously wrote the note.
But it sounds like it was maybe the brother because it sounds like the brother maybe had some anger issues in the past and the brother went up and gave her some pineapple because they always didn't say anything. She was up that night eating pineapple, even though they found pineapple in her stomach or whatever. I don't know. Basically, what I read was very compelling for the brother.
But I'm going to I feel horrible if the brother didn't do that because he's probably a big fan of the show.
Chapter 6: What comfort does mac and cheese bring to William?
So I want to. So if you're watching this. What is his name again? It's Burke. Burke, if you're watching this, hey, it might not have been you, dude. And also what somebody said is it could have been him and he really messed her up. But then like one of the parents ended up like finishing her off because she was dying.
And then they just ended up telling Burke, oh, yeah, some guy did break in and did kill her, even though he probably deep down knows that he actually is the one that did it. But who knows? I don't know. It was just a very compelling story because I thought for sure it's the mom or dad being creepy. But then I was thinking, oh, well, maybe the little boy.
Yeah.
For the number of years you've talked about this, I really don't know much about this story of JonBenet Ramsey. Oh my gosh. I've never really looked at it. It's just like this little girl died and she was like in beauty pageants. That's kind of all I know. And I guess any member of the family is now a suspect. I'll give you the link.
Yes.
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Chapter 7: How does William cope with winter weather in Texas?
Basically, the family that got the father super rich. So he's been able to just get him get everybody off the trail the entire time. And they were able to mess with all of the investigation like the day that it happened. They were able to make the people people got shit from the house and took it away and all this crap. So I don't know. But at least they like bunny rabbits.
I think that is very sweet in this picture, especially because it's like, how do you do that? Because you see a lot of these family pictures like this, but not really where they're holding the little animals like this.
No. Yeah. It's a cute little Easter photo.
It looks like cute little Easter photo. Calm before the storm. Very sadly for JonBenet. Oh, my gosh. Uh, very sad. So we'll get past that.
But yeah, we'll take it off of there.
But yes, if you're wondering now, I'm not so sure. I was always in the camp of mother or father, but now I may be in the camp of child as well. Do you think The Bunnies? Could The Bunnies have done it? The Bunnies, I don't know. Did you ever watch Roger and Me? What was that guy's name who did Bowling for Columbine, the director that was controversial?
Michael Moore?
Yeah, did you ever see that Roger and Me, Michael Moore film? No. It's a pretty good one. What reminds me of that is the bunnies because there were these people, it's like set in Detroit or somewhere where they got rid of a factory and everybody's real poor now. And it's this one crazy scene where somebody's just killing a bunch of rabbits, like smashing them into the ground.
And I guess they're eating the rabbits for meat. Mice and men style kind of thing. Yeah. What? Like the guy killing the person like he's he's as strong as he can crush his head like he didn't crush the rabbit to earlier.
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Chapter 8: How does William feel about the changing comedy landscape?
Yeah.
What do they have to kill that guy at the end?
Yeah, he kills him because he killed that lady. And he's like, you're just a danger at this point, right?
So they have to get rid of him. Yeah. I wonder if he was 40 yet. I wonder if he made it through halfway of his life or not. I don't know.
I mean, if you make it over 40, you can go. I'm at that point where I'm like, I guess I could die at this point. I'm good. Really? You've done everything you wanted to do? I hit the milestone. I hit over 40 and it's like gone. Have you done everything you wanted to do? Do you have anything on your bucket list?
No. Nothing.
I think I'm good. No. Have you been outside of America? Yeah, a number of times. Oh, nice. So you've got that. See, that's on my bucket list.
I guess I've been to Canada, but that's just so close. You know what? I do have one more thing. I do want to go to Antarctica really bad.
Oh, my gosh. What? Stay at one of the little bases they have there?
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