Chapter 1: Why is frustration a common reaction in our lives?
I'm somebody that loves to get frustrated. I love to rage quit. When I used to play FIFA, I would like throw my controller. My mom used to say I had anger problems and I needed to see somebody. I'm just really passionate and I hate losing to a terrible goal. That's like the game's fault. It's not my fault. Anyways, frustration has ruined my life though in many different forms.
It's actually made my life way more challenging than it needed to be. And oftentimes it came from the fact that my frustration would seep into my relationships with people. It no longer became, oh, I'm frustrated, but it became, I'm frustrated, let me take it out on somebody. Oh, my girlfriend is here, let me take it out on her. Never physically, but it did manifest in kind of this
frustrated I deserve something I want something the world is against me the whole spiral that you go down and if you are someone that gets frustrated really easily I want you to know that it doesn't have to be that way the way that you actually beat frustration is is you recognize A, where the frustration's coming from, but B, that the frustration, it's just something that sits on you.
Chapter 2: How can frustration affect our relationships?
Okay, it's something that is a part of you, But it's not something that you have to act on. People choose to act on frustration. When I was throwing my controller, I was choosing to do that. I kind of felt the tingle. I felt like the, and that was my release. You don't ever need to do that.
And I think that you need to learn to control your frustration because it can lead you to some really bad places. There are people in jail because they did not know how to handle their emotions and their frustration and instead they acted out against people instead of realizing, wait a minute, I'm upset about something that completely is not even related to this situation.
situation or this person. Frustration can also grow from other parts of your body, of your being, and get transplanted into a certain situation. You might be cussing out your best friend because he made fun of your music taste, but in reality, you're upset at yourself because you haven't been consistent with the gym and you promised yourself that you would be on top of things.
You have to find where the frustration is coming from. And is it rarely the fact that someone at your job said something to you and that's why you're angry at them? It's rarely that someone was being disrespectful and oh my goodness, I can't believe it. No. Oftentimes what it comes from is the fact that you are not happy with yourself. That's where all of my frustration came from.
A hundred percent and acting out on it just makes things worse. It's a temporary release. It makes you think, oh my gosh, I'm so powerful. I can, you know, I've got the power. But no, you don't, bro. Like, you will regret the action. You will regret it immediately after it happens. I promise you. I've literally, I've done that.
I've said things that were upsetting and rude and mean just because I felt frustrated and I thought that, you know, saying something to somebody else was going to help. It doesn't help at all. Nothing about that helped my situation. It just made things 10 times worse. It put more on my plate. So the next time you get frustrated, you have to recognize and take a step back.
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Chapter 3: What steps can we take to manage our frustration?
Good meta, leave. You're in a conversation, somebody's like being disrespectful, just be like, I'm out. On some shark take, I'm out. Like, go. Take a lap. Take a walk. Clear your head. You do not need to be in the same room. If you're forced to be in the same room, recognize you're frustrated. And just what I do is I just take a break from speaking and I listen. Let it be quiet. Let it be silent.
You don't need to talk all the time. You don't need to immediately go and throw out stuff. You can talk like adults. So chill out. Another thing that is so, I think, pertinent to frustration is are you good, Fahm? On some Toronto slang, are you good, Fahm? Are you fine?
Because if you're not okay, if something ticks you off and it's been building throughout the day, you are that much closer to utilizing all that ammo onto somebody else and putting yourself in a worse position than you were before. Are you good?
Like, I know, that's a stupid question, but are you eating well? Are you hungry? Are you tired? Or have you slept well?
Are you just annoyed because you haven't had a break? You haven't had alone time? These are all things that affect our mood. Contrary to popular belief, all of that stuff is very, very important in terms of how we interact socially with people and how we interact with ourselves. We like to overlook that, but I'm sure you can attest.
You've started beef with your family members over the fact that you had to wake up at 5 a.m. for a road trip and you didn't get a lot of sleep in the car. Of course you're irritable. You're biologically more irritable, 100%. And finally, with frustration, man. Sometimes the frustration, it will lead you into... A path of hopelessness.
And feeling like the frustration you feel in a friendship and a relationship with yourself is never going to be able to be solved by anything. It's a dark place to be in, but I do want to speak on that because I have found myself there many times and I've gotten out. In the same way as we mentioned all of those basics... There is always a core problem with hopelessness.
You find other things to stack on top of it, but there's usually a single thing that is holding you back. And you have to figure out and be real with yourself on some be real, right? What is that thing? Is it your school? And the fact that you transferred somewhere you don't like it. You have to change. You have to leave. And you have to go home. Is it your friends? They're kind of boring.
Not fun to be around. And you're done with hanging out with them. Is it your family? Are they putting the pressure on you and you feel like you can't even be your own person because you always have to do everything that's in accordance with their beliefs and their version of you? Is it your partner? Is your girlfriend, boyfriend taking up way too much of your mental?
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Chapter 4: How does self-awareness contribute to handling frustration?
That's what happens with frustration. And it can hit somebody, you know. Our teachers would get mad all the time because we would hit people with those. But, you know, that can happen and then you're in more of a problem than you initially even wanted to be in. So be careful and find what the root of the frustration is, man. For me, a big thing of frustration has been a lack of routine.
I just don't feel like I have any kind of control over the things that I'm doing. And that is because I just haven't been focused. I haven't felt like I have made a routine that's been good for me, and therefore, I attribute all of my slowness and time that I need to naturally decompress and chill and maybe brain rot a little bit with, oh my gosh, I'm lazy.
No, it's just you don't have a routine, FOM. You haven't been locked in on knowing when to wake up, knowing when to go to sleep, and you gotta figure that out, and then you're gonna probably feel a lot better about everything that's going around. It's not that complicated. I know we make it seem complicated, right?
And, you know, when we're frustrated, it's like we have this visor of just laser focus, negativity, everything turns red. But it takes a couple of seconds of recognizing that, wait a minute, I'm pissed off for no reason. to take the visor off and look at the actual real picture of things.
Oh yeah, I mean, I'm pissed off that my friend called me out, that I haven't been talking to him, but I haven't, to be fair. It's because, like, I don't really think I want to be his friend anymore. Yeah, you know, my girlfriend is really stressing me out with these gifts I'm getting for our anniversary, but maybe it's because I told myself I would save some money and I didn't.
Because the boys trip to Vietnam is coming up and I got to be stacked for that, right? Like, there is a root. Every tree has a root, right? Every problem has a root. You cannot think that you're going to just like deal with your life's problems by looking at the symptom and like, I feel angry so I'm going to do a rage room. No, man. You can feel frustrated, yes, and that's okay.
But staying in a situation staying in a mood of frustration is just, like, not good for you. Like, it's just a bad thing to do to your body. Like, your nervous system is all tight, and you're just like... Like, you're just angry, stank face. You're not listening to a fire beat, you know, from 2016, so why do you have a stank face?
It's not a Lil Uzi type beat, so why do you, you know... What's going on? You don't need a stank face. And don't get me wrong, bro. There are just people that are angry at life. Like, I'm sure you know people that they just complain about everything. Even if they won the lottery tomorrow, they would complain about the ticket being the wrong size.
Or the fact that they don't get all the money right away. Like, there are people that their sole purpose on earth, it seems... is to hate on everything and everyone in the process. Just stay away from those people. They're miserable and they're going to make you feel more frustrated. Same thing with trying to change people.
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Chapter 5: What are the consequences of acting out on frustration?
And Zerky Show, as always, I am sending you lots of love.
And peace.