Show notes
Some people have trouble achieving because they've never really outlined their goals and when you fail to define what you want, it's nearly impossible to get it. But maybe you have outlined your goals, you know exactly what you want, you've written it down like a good goal setter and you review it regularly. If you're still not achieving, then it's likely you've fallen into the gap between goal setting and goal achievement.
David: Hi and welcome to the podcast. Today, co-host Chris Templeton and I will discuss how to make the pivot from goal setting to goal achievement. Welcome Chris!
Chris: Hi David. You seem to be approaching this topic as if it's a given, but some people, I'm sure there's a lot of them get through life without setting any formal goals. What makes you think this is important?
David: Well, that's a valid question. Not everyone does set goals, but I would venture to say that if you're a business owner or a sales person, the type of person likely to listen to this podcast, then you're probably setting some goals. And some people, even if they don't realize they're setting goals are actually setting goals, so you might not formally say, “I am setting a goal to accomplish this by this date”, but you may think, "Hmm, I'd really love to have a car like that, or I'd really love to earn X amount of dollars per year, or I'd really love to have a house like that, or I'd really love to be able to pay my bills." Things like that where essentially they may just form a thought or an idea, but they actually are goals. It's things that we want and what is a goal other than something we want?
Chris: It seems like what you're talking about is traditional goal setting. It's the Field of Dreams approach. Boy, that'd be nice to have and then maybe that'll come as a result of that thought. It works out in the movies, but how do you see that playing out in real life?
David: Yeah, it does work in the movies. In real life, I think it's rarely a good idea - I mean, if it's something that you really want. There are aspects of life that we can just allow to unfold, things are going to happen and we're going to take advantage of them or we're not going to take advantage of them. Whatever's going to happen is going to happen. A lot of life is simply living it and seeing what happens and making decisions in the moment, and I'm not saying that all of life is going to be about setting and achieving goals, but when we think in terms of the things that we really want in the six areas that we had talked about in our podcast; I don't know, months ago, mental and physical and spiritual and social and financial and family. If we want to make things happen in those areas, then it really does boil down to deciding - what do we want to have happen and then what are we going to do to make it happen? When you think in terms of that field of dreams approach, you know "if you build it, they will come," it really is sort of wishful thinking. And so if you want those types of things to happen, you're far better off making them happen instead of just waiting for things to happen. And I would point out that the guy in the movie, he actually built that ball field, so he did do something to make it happen. It wasn't like he just waited for the universe to take care of it for him.
Chris: There a whole lot of effort there wasn't there? Whether it was convincing the poet Laureate to go with him. Ah, such a great movie! But a lot of what we're seeing in the last, I don't know, five or 10 years, is things like The Secret and Law of Attraction. Is that approach realistic when it comes to goal achievement?
David: Well, that's a good question. I mean, some people love The Secret and if you're not familiar with what The Secret is, if you're listening to this podcast and you're not sure what that is; The Secret was a movie that came out a while ago, I believe. There was also a podcast and a website and a bunch of different things and it was really talking about what they refer to as the Law of Attraction, and that's a concept that's been around for a long, long time, well before The Secret. And I saw that and I didn't love it. And the reason I didn't love it is not that I don't believe that we attract things into our lives because certainly we do. And the Law of Attraction, I think to some extent if you're doing certain things, then yeah, you're going to attract the people and circumstances that will help you if for no other reason because you're looking for them. When you're focused on achieving a particular outcome, you're going to be a lot more likely to notice the things that are going to help you to get there. So, from that standpoint, just logic alone tells you that you're going to find those things. You’re going to be more likely to find those things than if you're not in that zone, but it's not just about wishing those things into existence. And that's where I think they got a little off track in The Secret. They implied that if you just think things and you put it mentally out into the universe, that it's going to start happening and in my experience, that has not been the case. Yes, it starts with an idea, starts with a thought, starts with putting that thought and those actions out into the universe, but it really doesn't happen in earnest until we put a little muscle behind it. We don't just have our intention. We also have our actions. What are we going to do that's going to help us to accomplish the goals that we set for ourselves?
Chris: And having the space to really think these things out. I want that house. Why do I want it? What do I see myself doing in there? Anything that I can do to make it more real is kind of the law of attraction side of things and that's certainly helpful when I can imagine the process of getting and achieving this goal. But what you're saying (at least I think what I hear you saying) is that there needs to be more muscle in terms of really kind of the nitty gritty defining things out a little more. Is that a fair statement?
David: Yeah, and directing our actions. You also touched on a really important point that I just want to highlight. You had mentioned if you're thinking about a house or whatever, why you want that house and I think why is really critical because why is usually the thing that powers us, it's going to be the thing that fuels us to be able to take the actions we want to take. If we say, Oh, that's a really nice house, I'd like to have it, but we don't really think of it beyond that. It's likely nothing's going to happen. But if we think in terms of why: Well, what's that going to do for me? What's going to do for my lifestyle? What's it going to do for my family? How would it feel to live there? And to be able to go there day after day and park my car in that garage, right? Live there, and so when you really focus on that, why it can be a tremendous driver of action and of course it's the actions I believe that are ultimately going to impact all of that. If you get everything else into play, if you're thinking in terms of what you want to accomplish and you're putting those thoughts out into the universe and you come up with a plan, okay, I'm going to take step one and step two and step three and step four and step five and these are the things I'm going to do, then I think you're far more likely to create that result than if you're just sort of hoping it's going to happen and trying to wish it into existence.
Chris: One of the other things that occurs to me is that as I think this through and think about the things that are important to me about achieving this goal, I kind of align myself with being inspired to do something versus having to motivate myself to do something. And I think a big piece of what you're talking about is really getting to a place where I'm clear enough on why and what I want, that it's like, "Oh, I know what the next step is going to be!" It's inspired action, don't you agree?
David: Yeah, and I think that that inspired action really does flow directly from the why. When we know why it is we want to do something, we're going to be far more likely to take that action and it's the why that inspires us. It's not just the what, it's not the car or the house or the income or whatever. That's essentially a thing that's sort of the object of our affection or our attention. But when we think about the why, why do I want to drive that kind of car? What would I love about that? How would that make me feel when you get into the why, that's what really starts to get the juices flowing and really gets us focused on the desire side of things, which will then inspire us to take the kind of action that's likely to be necessary in order to get the thing we want.
Chris: Yeah. And a lot of people will say, “Well, you know why - it's obvious. It's be nice to have a new house or you know, a new car.” But when you ask yourself why four or five times, why is that important? Why is it important to have a new house? Well, I want my family to be comfortable. Well, why is that important? And when you start to drill down a little bit, that inspiration comes much more clear than why do I want it? It'd be really nice to have a new house. If you dig a little deeper. I think you find that you're going to get a whole lot more inspired action as a result.
David: Yeah, no question. And I think you'll also find that the people who lack the why, the ones who just say, well, I think it'd be nice to have or I just want it, are going to be far less likely to take action and do the things necessary to make it happen because if it happens, hey great, and if it doesn't, well I'm okay with that too.