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Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
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Hi, everyone. Welcome back. This is part two of a two-part recap. If you're wondering where part one was, well, go check in the feed and be sure to subscribe.
Chapter 2: What happens when Captain Sandy sends a group text to the crew?
So that way you always get your episodes. But enough of that. Let's get right back into the episode. So now we see a text from Captain Sandy. Sandy has created a group. Hey everyone, I'm making a group text. I'm calling it Sandy and the Diarrhea Heads. Okay, it's to Nathan and Tessa. So Nathan, meet Tessa. She's your new deckhand who is also sick.
So if you hear some retching in the room next door, that's probably her. I hope you guys are feeling better. Update me in the morning. And remember, if you don't make it here, the whole season's canceled. So no pressure. But we do have Capacti here on board. So get into a cab. OK, thanks so much.
13 hours before charter. Do not forget to sleep, Josh. And Josh is like, you're going to have to force me to stop working. And so now it's time to go to bed. And now it's 2.35 a.m. Someone looks at their wiener, which I thought was really funny. I don't know which guy it was, but someone just lifted up the covers and just stared at their wiener for a minute in the dark and then put the covers on.
That was probably Max.
That seems like Max's behavior.
Is it still there?
It's the next day, 6 a.m., and six hours before the charter, and V is checking the dryer and everything. Max is checking with Josh. He's, like, asking if Josh slept well. Josh is like, no, man, you know, I hadn't listened to music all day, so I had to put some music in my ear. I found it kind of helped me, you know.
I used to work in kitchens where we didn't have much music for years, and I didn't realize how much it affected me until I left that kind of work, and I would— go home and I would just shake that tambourine for hours on end. And I was like, wait a second, I need to incorporate this into my carpaccios.
So he tells us that the box they want you to fit in at a Michelin star restaurant is, like, robotic. And he's, like, really creative, guys. He's got long hair. So he had to get away. And he really sees himself as an artist. And he enjoys all sorts of different mediums. Writing, writing music, playing guitar, dressing like rock stars, whatever.
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Chapter 3: How does the crew prepare for the charter just hours before?
Be there in 20. How do baby crabs work? So now more cleaning commences and crew uniforms need to get done. Come on, guys. Come on, V. And she's like, all right, here's how you do it. Just throw the uniforms in and do Express 30. She's like, I see what you're saying. Do you? Yeah. Go to Express in 30. No, the washing machine, not the store. Got it. Go to Express. I know a dead person.
We've already covered that.
Chapter 4: What humorous incidents occur during the crew's first night?
Please don't make me do this. Being a steward, my technique is called winging it hard. That's my technique. So now Nathan is walking up to the boat. I was looking for any signs of clenching. He's like, sorry, I know producers. He wants me to have a nice slow-mo walk up to the boat, but I really need to get to the loo. But he says, hi. And Sandy's like... Like, oh my God, I'm so glad you're here.
How are you? Did you bring that crib you're working on? He's like, no, I couldn't. Yesterday was a disaster. Not only did I have, not only did I have, you know, diarrhea coming out every hole of my body, but I still couldn't figure out that damn crib. But we're here. We're going to make it work.
Yeah, well, the guys did a real good job. You know, Max said a lot of things in French and threatened to cut people's heads off. So that was fine. I love a go-getter, you know. So Max has more experience. He's got more than the other two. So I'd go with Max, you know, just go for Max. I love him. You know what?
Max got some, what do they call that where they tell you things in your brain and it tricks you into doing it? Hypnotize. He's been hypnotized. So I think he's a, you know what?
Chapter 5: How does the crew react to the arrival of the new deckhand Tessa?
He's basically the captain now. Okay. Guess what? Max is now the lead producer on wind. I quit. What am I even here for? Max is amazing. She's going to eat those words so hard. She's going way too hard for Max. And this isn't like Sandy, right? Right.
Yeah, it isn't. But maybe she has a new attitude. So Nathan goes in, he meets Christian and Nathan and V and everything. It's just more like, oh, where do things go? Everything. And and, you know, Nathan's giving orders about go to this port side, go to that side, whatever. Josh has is making food in the kitchen and Nathan's looking at CVS. And now finally we meet Tessa.
Tessa, who also was sick, is finally arriving at the boat.
Uh-oh. Where is Tessa? Here she comes. And Max is like, oh, trouble is coming. Take a look. Give him some time. Just don't name the lead deckhand right yet. Give it till charter three before you say Max is president of the boat. Okay? And Max is already in love with Tessa. He's like, look at this princess. Hello, mademoiselle. Go, go, go, go, go, go. Yes. You walking dildo. Walking dildo.
Okay. Bonjour, madame. Where are you from? She's like, bed in bed.
She's like, oh, I don't understand that. She's like, well, I thought about coming yesterday, but then the thought, just the thought of shitting myself on the deck, I just couldn't. I couldn't do it at all. I gotta love those boys. My last two boats have been 120 meters plus. I'm used to working with a team of 10. 10 boys who I raised from babies. Okay.
You know, we get jobless at the start of the day and have no rules, so in my mind, I'm just like, oh, this will be easier. It's just like a small scale of what I'm already used to on the McBee family firm.
Okay, go change. Please don't speak in that accent anymore, sir.
Oh, God, I'm not stopping. You can't take the country out of the country girl. You can take the country girl out of the country, but you can't take the country out of the girl in my life.
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Chapter 6: What challenges does Nathan face as the new bosun?
Actually, I'm okay with that song. It's a nice song. That's a good one. It's actually a good one. It's a good one.
So now we have our preference sheet meeting. Preference sheet meeting. Separate rooms, everybody. I like that in all the years of Below Deck, they finally decided to change up. And they're like, we need every producer on every Below Deck ever invented in one room. All right. What are the new ideas to keep this show fresh?
We should have preference sheet meetings in different rooms.
Oh, my God. We're here for another decade. We're here for another decade. Margaret, you just got a raise.
I love this idea because before it was a captain telling the heads of departments what to do, but now it's heads of departments telling other people what to do. It's just a whole new show. I love it. And what was this? How about this? Everyone gets an iPad that they can use for 10 minutes to look at the preference sheets.
Liking out the fine dildo in here. There's child locks on there, Max. Okay. Jesus Christ. Okay. Preference sheet meeting. So let's find out who these people are, guys. The primary is Carl. I'm Carl. I'm a serial entrepreneur. I'm renowned in the world of non-alcoholic web startups.
I'm really into websites that don't drink.
Soft Bitcoin. Give me a soft cyber currency. Crypto, crypto, soft crypto.
Okay, so he's a douchebag. Friends of Carl, Eunice, Philip, Jess, Maria, Da Vinci, and his fiancee, Alexandra, hoping for a luxury profession to save us on this trip.
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Chapter 7: How does the crew handle the chaos of launching the water toys?
How do I do this? And he's like, all right, well, you know, hold on. We got to take the lines out. What about the lazarette? We have lazarette. And what about the forward peak? What about the forward aft? What about the boat? What about the crib? Are there any ants around here? And he's like having to run around like,
But how do I do this? How do I press a button? You just put your finger on it and you press. But do I do it this way? No, you're twisting it. But how do I put it around? It's like, just put your finger on it and press. I don't get it.
And finally, it's just like, ask the engineers for help, please. Jesus Christ. It's like, ask Bjork, please. Yeah, ask Barky, okay? And Max has the starboard. He's like, clear, channel clear. I cut off its head. And Da Vinci's like, Bitcoin, Bitcoin, Bitcoin, Bitcoin. Carl says, yeah, there's always bigger yachts, but you can never have the biggest yacht. Unless you're Jeff Bitcoin Bezos.
Am I right?
Engineer, engineer. Engineer, engineer. Please, I'm about to die. I can't get the laser. Pick on to the boat.
He's like, don't do it over the radio. Just go down.
Oh, is he down there? I'm sorry. I don't even know how to use the radio.
So he's like freaking out because everything's going to shit. And he's like, yeah, I can see this team's not really capable of giving 100% quite yet. Oh, I'm all set. Thanks, Nathan. God, that went smoothly. Hi, everybody.
This is a big one. You did it. So Nathan's like, oh, God, this is a nightmare. So now he's giving some more orders around. Aisha's asking... Asking the guys what they do. And this guy, Philip, is like, you have a real estate company in Dubai. And Carl's like, in Dubai, you can buy anything in crypto. Like you can get like even a functional non-alcoholic bar there. Brick and mortar.
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Chapter 8: What goes wrong during the jet ski launch?
Okay, everyone. All crew, ETA in 10 minutes. ETA. Capri pants are arriving on a taxi in 10 minutes. Get ready. Get those ankles ready to be exposed to the sun. Get that suntan lotion out because the capri pants are coming in, everyone.
Get ready for that two inches of pure suntan on those ankles, everybody. Let's get to it.
It's like cracking the window in your car on a hot day, you know?
So Josh and Nathan are talking, and Josh is like, hey, Shaggar. And he's like, hey, Top Shaggar, I'm going to behave myself this year, though, telling you I'm on my best behavior.
And he's just like, whatever, I don't believe it. When's the last time you talked to a girl? I love a girl.
Hot two days ago, I think. She's like, oh, really? So you guys have fought? It's like, no, yeah, we're friends, yeah.
Oh, good. Also, they broke up, which is good to know because the previews are like, Nathan's cheating on a pregnant lady all season long. So it's good to know that they're at least broken up.
which by the way, just goes to show like Gail, like one of the hottest people we've ever seen on Bravo. And even like this, like, you're not gonna, you're not gonna lock that down, Nate. I mean, obviously he does eventually, but like, seriously, this is just, this is, this, this life is just not fair. Yeah. Yeah. Men are still gonna, men are still gonna look for something else, no matter what.
Men are gonna men. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial. So you go saw each other for six months? And he's like, yeah, until Christmas time. Uh-oh. He broke up with her at Christmas? What the hell? What's wrong with him? He says he cut it off around Christmas time. That's the one you want to have a baby with, ladies. That is the one. Get him now.
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