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Watch What Crappens

#3132 Crappens Rewind: My Octopus Teacher on Netflix (Part 1)

24 Dec 2025

Transcription

Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?

7.439 - 25.02 Unknown

Who cares what happens when there's so much that happens? Who cares what happens when there's so much that happens? Who cares what happens when there's so much that happens? Oh, I'm excited for this bonus episode.

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25.04 - 41.454 Ronnie Karam

I'm very excited, too. Ben picked this bonus episode. We were looking for things to cover, and I was like, okay, octopus, whatever, stupid, whatever. Octopus, I guess I have to watch an octopus video now. No! And then, of course, I cried. It's the best thing I've ever seen, and I really want to find love now.

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41.554 - 64.299 Unknown

So what Rodney's talking about is there's this documentary on Netflix called My Octopus Teacher, and people are starting to talk about it. Cameron from Southern Charm put up a video where she was a blubbering mess. She was like, this is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. And it just felt like this was going to be a thing that people would be talking about.

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64.339 - 85.358 Unknown

And if it doesn't quite reach Tiger King levels, that's fine. But I just was like, this seems almost ridiculous enough and yet great enough that we should cover it. And we've never recapped a nature documentary before. We've recapped everything else, I think, except for nature. Vanderpump Rules. I mean, that's true.

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Chapter 2: Why did the hosts decide to recap 'My Octopus Teacher'?

85.418 - 110.599 Unknown

That is basically like life on the savannah. animals and and you know lots of things with warts you know eating each other so yeah throwing feces at each other so um yeah so this is it's the documentary is called my octopus teacher and it's about a man who befriends an octopus so i mean shall we dive in shall we get into this madness

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110.9 - 126.719 Ronnie Karam

Yes, let's get in. Now, this is basically one big long story told by him. Okay, so that's pretty much what you're going to get in this. And it opens with an octopus swimming. People say octopus are like alien.

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127.34 - 133.667 Ben Mandelker

But the strange thing is, as you get close to them, you realize you're very similar in a lot of ways.

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133.647 - 134.128 Ronnie Karam

No.

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134.83 - 145.113 Unknown

Okay, so... I have Atoms. She has Atoms. I can change my color. She can change my color. It's like, sir, what LSD are you taking?

146.917 - 167.591 Ronnie Karam

She can change her texture and grow horns. I can change my texture and grow horns. Now, physically, that might not be true. You know, I was resisting this movie and I have been listening to the Oprah Super Soul podcast. As you know, I love it. And Brene Brown was on there. Now, I resist some Brene Brown in my life. Like, I don't need some snooty Texas woman telling me what to do.

167.611 - 186.891 Ronnie Karam

I've had one my whole life. But then I listened to Brene Brown. Love her now, of course. And her whole thing is about being vulnerable. And if you're resisting something, it's because it's bothering you on a level that you need to address and you need to stop resisting that and you need to be vulnerable to it. And so I was like, why am I resisting this octopus thing?

187.011 - 193.717 Ronnie Karam

And by the end of this, I was like, oh my God, I am just like that octopus. I'm even made of jelly. I could probably hide in a rock really fast.

194.398 - 202.485 Unknown

You could. I think you're like made for an octopus lifestyle. Just like hanging out in a den, maybe going out, maybe meeting someone.

Chapter 3: How does the documentary portray the relationship between the filmmaker and the octopus?

379.5 - 401.76 Ronnie Karam

And the place is on the tip of Africa. It's known as the Cape of Storms. My childhood memories are completely dominated by the rocky shore and the tide. Boom, boom, boom, tide, tide, tide. And then we see this little tiny house, which, I mean, who builds a house right where, who builds a house in the middle of a damn wave?

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401.74 - 410.957 Unknown

I just want to see that one. I want to see that house on House Hunters International. House number three is far from town. And also, the ocean knocks it over every few months.

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412.359 - 416.186 Ronnie Karam

House number three was owned by a very nice man who drowned in his sleep.

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417.388 - 438.125 Unknown

Well, I just love these appliances. It's fully updated, mainly because it was destroyed about two weeks ago. And oh, look, there goes the door. So he actually says, he's like, I grew up in a wooden bungalow as a child and it was built below the waterline and the ocean would knock down the doors and fill the bottom of the house with water.

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438.245 - 450.342 Unknown

And it was incredibly exciting to literally live in the force of that giant Atlantic ocean. I'm like, that sounds awful. The ocean is like flooding your, your first floor every single time. What about your toys? What about your TV? Like what?

450.362 - 454.748 Ronnie Karam

Like that's what kind of life he's living. That's why I'm saying he's a depressed person.

454.728 - 479.79 Ronnie Karam

he's living in a wave basically a constant wave what what can you not have you can't have a tv in there you can't plug in your phone downstairs yeah you can't iron anything in the foyer every single day in the foyer yes like what do you never iron like that's i mean i don't either but still probably so annoying in school because he goes most of my childhood was spent in rock pools diving in the shallow kelp forest that's what i most love to do it's like

479.77 - 490.309 Unknown

Hey, like you're at school. It's like, hey, you want to come over? I got my He-Man figures. I have a better idea. Let's dive amongst the kelp. It's like, oh, Craig.

491.411 - 500.029 Ronnie Karam

Would you like to come over to my house after school and get your feet all wrinkly? Because they'll be wet the entire time. Knock, knock.

Chapter 4: What unique characteristics of octopuses are highlighted in the episode?

500.409 - 515.599 Unknown

Who's there? The Atlantic Ocean pouring itself in. Exciting! It's like, is that delivery? It's like, every time that there's a knock on the door, you don't know whether it's like UPS or a giant wave crashing into your house.

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515.579 - 534.701 Ronnie Karam

As an adult, I'd been separated from that, and that was fine at first, until I went to central Kalahari 20 years ago. And then it's like... Yeah. And now, you know, here we are, and there's like a man running with an arrow, like a tribal guy running with an arrow, and they're chasing some animal or something.

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535.121 - 544.692 Ronnie Karam

And he tells us, I was making a film called The Great Dance with my brother, and met these men who were the best trekkers in the world. And to watch these men go to incredible...

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544.672 - 572.586 Ronnie Karam

links to find subtle finds in nature things my eyes couldn't see and they would do it for hours they were inside the natural world and i could feel i was outside well it's like yes you're outside like deal with it it's fine we're all outside of it okay but i want to be alive inside yeah like you have to pick achievable goals you know like you can't go to a zoo and be like god i wish i was a monkey my life sucks

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572.566 - 587.061 Unknown

So, 18 years later. By the way, and also, when he was making that movie, he was hot. He was real hot. I was like, Craig, how about that? Your goal is to get, like, great dance, but get back into, like, great dance shape. How about that?

587.261 - 595.63 Ronnie Karam

Yeah, go back to hip hop jazz, you know? But I think that he is still pretty hot. I mean, he had a pretty hot dad bod. I mean, look, that's even a goal for me.

595.67 - 602.117 Unknown

You had a hot dad bod, but you had a hot, like, year 2000 bod. Or maybe it was, like, the 90s. I don't know when it was.

602.097 - 608.785 Ronnie Karam

But he's totally one of those hot guys who uses patchouli and they're like, I don't have to take a shower because I'm hot and I'm into nature. And you're like, gross.

609.606 - 625.083 Unknown

How many people did he bore at cocktail parties about like, when I was in Kenya, I met the greatest trackers in the world. They could see a grain of salt and know exactly what animal it came from. It's like, great, thanks. We're trying to talk about Big Brother here.

Chapter 5: How does the film depict the emotional journey of the octopus?

780.837 - 785.005 Ronnie Karam

Now, that's normally the point where someone signs up for Zumba, you know?

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788.011 - 799.213 Unknown

It's a great time for Zumba. You can either plunge yourself into, like, vicious churning waves in the Cape of Storms that are, like, negative 500 degrees, or take Zumba.

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799.568 - 819.332 Ronnie Karam

Yeah, like I'm older, I'm slightly depressed, adrenal shit's going on. Apparently my wife won't even be in the same room with me. You know, I'll take a Zumba class or start walking around the neighborhood or something like that. I'm always an advocate for board games. Settlers of Catan. But just like it's going to live in the ocean. You know, that's a little extreme, Craig.

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819.312 - 844.583 Unknown

Yeah, and he chooses the worst part of the ocean. He's like, literally, it is a hellscape of water. There's these waves crashing and craggy rocks, and it looks cold, like it feels cold. And he's like, the water drops down to eight to nine degrees Celsius, and you just have to relax, and then you'll get this beautiful time for 10 to 15 minutes when suddenly everything feels okay.

844.603 - 847.687 Unknown

I'm like, you're getting delirious. You're going into shock, and you're delirious, Craig.

847.707 - 850.233 Ronnie Karam

You're literally dead, Craig. I think Craig died.

851.055 - 853.703 Unknown

I think this is all from his, like, yeah, his ghosts.

854.365 - 869.822 Ronnie Karam

Yeah, you're dead, Craig, okay? Is someone gonna tell Craig that he's dead? He's like, the cold upgrades the brain because you get a flood of chemicals every time you immerse. It's like, dude, if you had spent less time tracking and more time out with people, you would have found cocaine.

Chapter 6: What challenges does the octopus face in its environment?

906.05 - 912.437 Unknown

I'm not sure because there was another director that was listed and her name was Pippa. So I think Pippa might be in the mix as well. I can't tell.

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913.138 - 917.663 Ronnie Karam

But you think she was in the water? Because I think to get that intimate... Maybe she did the interviews.

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918.2 - 921.986 Unknown

Maybe she got, like, a director credit because she did interviews and maybe some of the nature footage.

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922.507 - 937.232 Ronnie Karam

Yeah, because, I mean, he just shot this. I mean, it is just stunning. And I don't know how much color correction or whatever was done at the end, but I was, I mean, just totally taken away the whole time. Really gorgeous work. Okay, let's go back to making fun of stupid Craig.

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937.252 - 958.324 Unknown

Yeah. So he's talking about how swimming through the kelp forest is really cool, because it's basically like, it's a forest, but you enter from the top, and it's basically like flying, because you're not bound by gravity. And we see all these jellyfish and everything, and he starts talking about getting... He goes, you naturally just get more relaxed in the water.

958.384 - 971.727 Unknown

I'm like, I would not be more terrified than to be there, like... With only my bathing suit on and a mask, holding my breath while there are sharks swimming everywhere. That's not my idea of relaxing.

972.108 - 990.639 Ronnie Karam

Yes, I mean, and I think that's why depressed people do so well in the world, because he's like, just kill me. What the fuck do I care? Oh, you think I care about jellyfish? No, I'm going to go swim right in the middle of those jellyfish and let them surround my dead body and see if they... It's like it doesn't even occur to him, like, I could die right now, because I'm standing.

991.059 - 996.288 Ronnie Karam

He's not wearing a wetsuit or anything either, he's wearing his Costco swimming shorts into the water, and that's it.

997.029 - 1009.196 Unknown

Yeah, well he says, having a scuba tank in a thick kelp forest is not optimal for me. What, because you don't like air? Is that not optimal, being able to breathe? Hate air. Stupid air.

Chapter 7: How do the hosts react to the film's portrayal of nature's violence?

1037.27 - 1045.759 Ronnie Karam

Oh, rich amphibious animal. Okay, you're getting closer. Okay. So then we see, like, a penis fish. We see all different kinds of fish. Weird shit. I've never seen.

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1046.099 - 1058.131 Unknown

Yeah. There's some thing in a koi. It looked like a shark, but it was shaped like a donut. Or it was not shaped. It was, like, biting its tail, and it was, like, rolling around in a donut shape. I was like, that animal has to get it together, because that's not good.

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1058.432 - 1066.72 Ronnie Karam

Yes, a shark eating his own tail. It was like a little dog chasing his own tail, but it was a shark. And he had it in his mouth. It was like a horror movie. It was weird.

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1066.852 - 1076.562 Unknown

Yeah, he had identity issues. He's like, I wish I could be more like a land-walking animal. That's like me. I want to be amphibious. Figuring out the shark's mindset.

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1076.582 - 1094.591 Ronnie Karam

So he's like, and suddenly I realized... I've got the energy to take pictures and film again. And so we see all these beautiful shots. We see a fish eating a crab. And then we see the fish eating his tail. And then we just see all these different kinds of... Jellyfish and weird things. Yeah. We see all these really cool fish.

1095.552 - 1100.959 Unknown

It's like going to a party on Real Housewives of New York. Like all the people in the background who just sort of stare at the camera. It was like all those fish.

1101.344 - 1103.851 Ronnie Karam

Yeah, it's like basically Ramona's birthday party.

1103.871 - 1111.152 Unknown

50 of my closest fish friends, okay?

1111.192 - 1112.957 Ronnie Karam

We've all slept with him, okay?

Chapter 8: What reflections do the hosts share about the filmmaker's journey?

1233.393 - 1251.474 Ronnie Karam

No, don't say that. How could you want to eat a fish after this movie? Oh, my God. I've been eating fish, and I felt so fucking guilty. Okay, so they show these fish that change color to wherever. I mean, it's so neat. And a big peach. It's like a big peach with a squirmy tail. Yeah. All these really weird fish.

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1251.814 - 1276.965 Unknown

Weird aliens. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappin's commercial. So then Craig is like, I remember the day when it all started. And then he basically starts talking about how he went to a, he found this kelp forest. And he's like, everything is murky, but there's a small patch where you can dive and

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1277.452 - 1298.346 Unknown

I saw a strange shape to the left, which is what this movie also could have been called because like half this documentary is him saying. And then I don't know what overcame me, but I looked to my left and I saw a shape that I will never forget in the rest of my life. It's like every time it's like you see something to the left. To the left, to the left. Saw a strange shape to the left.

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1298.326 - 1310.49 Ronnie Karam

So he sees this really strange thing, and it is pretty cool. It's like a ball, but with all these shells glued to it. It looks like a collection of shells.

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1310.55 - 1317.263 Unknown

It looks like a second-grader's art project, basically. Someone was given a styrofoam ball, and they had to glue shells on it.

1317.563 - 1322.888 Ronnie Karam

Yeah, or like if the cast of Little Mermaid was going to go bowling, you know, like a seashell bowling ball or whatever.

1323.108 - 1324.73 Unknown

Yeah, it looked oddly delicious.

1325.411 - 1338.083 Ronnie Karam

And then these fish were like, what the hell's that? Hey, what the hell's that? Did you guys see that shell ball? Hey, did you see the shell ball? Let's go look at the shell ball. Yeah. There's like three little fish who, they just like, because, you know, they have big dumb eyes.

1338.624 - 1355.865 Unknown

Fish are dumb. If I'm a fish and I see a strange ball that's larger than me that I've never seen before, I'm not going up to it. Like how, I mean, how many nature, how many, honestly, how many underwater videos do we have to watch of fish getting absolutely tricked all the time? It's like, oh, look, there's a lantern. Ah, I'm dead.

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