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Watch What Crappens

#3350 Below Deck Down Under S04E14 Part One: Hair Today Gone Tomorrow

05 May 2026

Transcription

Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?

0.031 - 19.617 Ben Mandelker

Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap!

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21.327 - 49.14 Ben Mandelker

Well, hello and welcome to Watch Where Crap Ends, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we'd love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker, and I'm joined today not only by Ronnie Karam, but also a third member of the podcast. It's the morning dove outside my window singing its huge hit. What a classic. What a classic morning dove.

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51.466 - 74.773 Ben Mandelker

let me tell you something when i hear that song come on i'm like this is my jam morning dove outside my window hi everyone welcome to watch where crap ends

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75.53 - 99.799 Ben Mandelker

got a morning dove i got a morning i'm gonna poop on yourself because i'm a dove oh yeah morning dove so the morning dove like they're so adorable got two morning doves and they are they're like the most adorable little lovebirds literally sitting next to each other every single day they sit on a different part of my patio and they just poop all over the place just poop and

99.779 - 123.795 Ben Mandelker

just everywhere morning like my days are now spent hosing down my patio from morning death poop but they are so cute together and i cotton caught them getting intimate it's just a life out here it really is like watching below deck which is what we're actually here to talk about today ronnie how's it going good not better now i have morning death porn in my head i mean could it yeah there be a better start to a day i don't think so

124.4 - 130.454 Ben Mandelker

I caught it on video. I'll post the video. It is not unlike watching some of these hookups on Below Deck.

Chapter 2: What tensions arise between Daisy and Ellie in this episode?

132.278 - 137.329 Ben Mandelker

But we've got that going on. You guys, we also have a cabaret coming up.

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137.512 - 159.283 Ben Mandelker

in uh literally a month from today it is may 5th we have a cabaret on june 3rd and june 5th the first two shows sold out we added a late show so if you want tickets to that get that uh also you can watch it anywhere in the world there are streaming tickets so uh come join for that go to watch what happens.com to find the ticket links or go to our social media the links are there as well

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159.263 - 181.896 Ben Mandelker

So there's that. We also have Patreon, uh, patreon.com slash watch for crap. It's a weekly bonus episode, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. Newsletter ad for listening video, all the great things. Big thanks to everyone who came to crappy hour last night. We had two very special guests. We, um, had the team from Hollywood crime scene. Woo.

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181.876 - 203.091 Ben Mandelker

they were so funny i love those girls we have to do yeah they were great they were great so we spent a lot of time talking about beverly hills so if you missed it come join us for the next one okay um that's i think it we got a big episode of below deck to talk about big one yes oh this was so good oh my gosh

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203.071 - 228.026 Ronnie Karam

you know ellie has really really crystallized her villainy i mean she's you know she comes this is what our third season third or fourth season coming back on the show and she's really she tries it every time she does a pretty decent job but she has really become um a great villain I mean, she has so many balls in the air and she can just she's just fucking with everybody at this point.

228.146 - 235.44 Ronnie Karam

And I loved it. I loved every second of it. It was so funny. And she she got, you know, she caused pure mayhem.

236.146 - 255.522 Ben Mandelker

Ellie is really a great villain on this show because I think it comes from an authentic place. I don't think she's trying to be a villain. I think that when she feels wronged, she like lashes out and it's like, I think it comes from like a, like a deep place in her soul and not like even a mean place. It's just like a place of like,

256.143 - 279.106 Ben Mandelker

this is just how she sees the world no maybe a mean place but like it's just you know when they showed her coming on board earlier this season i just started chuckling because i knew i knew what chaos was about to happen and sure enough it's like it's just it's perfect she i think actually ellie is now at that tier uh, uh, below deck stars that is like special, right?

279.147 - 298.092 Ben Mandelker

Like that's normally reserved for, uh, chief stews, bosons and chefs. And she's like the only one I would argue. She's probably the only one of that's not a HOD that has, has broken into this tier of like, when you see them coming, you think, oh, it's going to be a good season, you know?

Chapter 3: How does Mike find himself in a hairy situation?

311.96 - 319.249 Ben Mandelker

Did she really? Yeah. After this season wrapped, she went to culinary school. So she actually earned that title.

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319.99 - 325.637 Ronnie Karam

Oh, I thought she was just giving it to herself after doing this, you know, chef assistant thing.

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325.617 - 350.275 Ben Mandelker

no no she actually did she did the work she went to culinary school now is she qualified to be a full-fledged yacht chef just yet maybe not but um but yeah i mean but i'm sure we will see her as the yacht chef soon enough you know wow she's she's like baladeck for the rest of my life i will be there you will see me don't you worry

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350.255 - 356.843 Ronnie Karam

So good for her. Okay. So below deck down under season four, episode 14, head of the deck stew department.

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359.666 - 361.088 Ben Mandelker

Yeah. She's so good.

361.328 - 376.245 Ronnie Karam

She's so good that we left out the headline, which is that stupid Mike, this is the demise of Mike. And that was pretty fun too. But yeah, when you're, when you get fired and you're still upstaged by a better villain, poor guy, I felt bad for him. You can't even do this right.

376.478 - 402.908 Ben Mandelker

like oh i'd never keep a job well yeah you can't even keep a villain role that's so sad you got upstaged as a villain you got fired at the 30-minute mark you weren't even a cliffhanger for next week like that's just then you know you really failed fired at 30 minutes uh-uh like the only time it's except yeah like like no no like he should have been a he should have been a cliffhanger and the fact that he couldn't even get there says everything

403.462 - 425.426 Ronnie Karam

Couldn't it happen to a cuter guy? And they showed him, or he showed himself, he had an Instagram video where he's like, Oh, hey, it's me. And he's shaved his head, which thank God. You know, sometimes I feel like I really am manifesting from this chair right here. But he shaved his head. I had to see. And he has a video where he's getting in a cab or something with Joe Bradley.

426.047 - 433.62 Ronnie Karam

And so they're making it look like Joe Bradley is going to come back. And I thought, oh, God, of course, that's your friend. Fucking Joe Bradley. Ugh.

Chapter 4: What roles do the characters play in the unfolding drama?

824.459 - 837.975 Ben Mandelker

And Alicia is in her bikini. She's like flopping around in that lagoon while everyone's drinking. And Jenna is like talking to Daisy and she's like, yeah, then I was gone. And she's like, well, do you want, you want the DL about Ben?

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838.315 - 841.399 Unknown

Oh no, he's DL. Oh man. Just when I thought I met someone.

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841.479 - 847.065 Ben Mandelker

No, not that kind of DL. We fought. I'm on a rampage. I just want that pass from everyone.

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847.886 - 868.702 Ronnie Karam

One thing Daisy is always going to do is gossip with her staff. She loves it. She's going to go shit talk with her staff. And I think on any other season, I'd be like, you should not be shit talking with your staff. But it's Daisy, so I think it's really funny. She's like, let me tell you what a bastard they are. So she is telling her all the goss from the dinner.

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869.023 - 874.633 Ronnie Karam

And she's like, well, yeah, it was crazy. I was on a rampage. I'll kill him. All right, what's going on with, what's going on here?

874.673 - 886.495 Unknown

And she's like, I almost ran off on Mark because he kept instigating and he made a sign for himself saying H-I-D, H-I-D, and he kept on holding it up there the entire fucking night. I almost lost it on him.

888.365 - 897.494 Ben Mandelker

I'm telling you right now, look back in 10 years' time, and you will be so much more successful and so much more happier than he is. I was like, damn, but she's right.

899.276 - 905.563 Ronnie Karam

You'll have so much more hair on the back of your neck than his. He'll just have little lines, little scar lines.

906.544 - 914.152 Ben Mandelker

I need to find Mike. I need to see this photo of him or video of him with his head shaved. Do we know what his last name is? Mike Below Deck.

Chapter 5: What happens during the crew's dinner and how does it impact their dynamics?

1757.938 - 1761.042 Ronnie Karam

I really need to do. I need to just start keeping this house cleaner and

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1761.022 - 1784.346 Ronnie Karam

i need to get up in the morning and then i'll write a list like clean the toilet clean the clean the kitchen counters and it's like doing something you know or if you're like i'm really feeling like i need to be healthier i'm gonna eat healthier tomorrow and then you look up diets on youtube and then i don't know you you buy a vegetable but you never eat it or do the diets it's it counts as something it takes the calories to make the list i feel like

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1784.731 - 1797.962 Ben Mandelker

Yeah, I think that counts. It really does. Thank you. Yeah, yeah. So now we're back at the lagoon because we seem to be stuck in this lagoon. This is a very existential thing. We're just going to be in a lagoon for the rest of the season.

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1798.844 - 1801.39 Unknown

I hope so because it was lit.

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1802.197 - 1824.864 Ben Mandelker

That lagoon was going off. Can I say something, by the way, that has nothing to do with anything, but just popped into my mind. I texted this to Ronnie yesterday very urgently. I think it was just on yesterday's Real Housewives of Atlanta recap that I was saying how my timeline has become... full of random facts and figures about TV shows.

1824.924 - 1844.881 Ben Mandelker

And like 30 years ago on this day, 25 years ago on this date, while I was saying that whole thing yesterday, little did I realize that yesterday was the 30 year anniversary of the final episode of sisters. So, I mean, guys, it was a, I feel like may the fourth is known for being star Wars day, but let's also remember it's sister's day.

1845.501 - 1849.905 Ronnie Karam

But you see, that's how you, that's how you know the universe is listening to you.

1850.155 - 1869.784 Ben Mandelker

when a man on bravo gets a haircut that's how i know the universe is listening to me it's like i feel like we're blessed we're blessed yeah we are we are because like as soon as we were done recording yesterday i went on to twitter and it said 30 years ago today actually it said on this day in 1996 sisters aired its final episode i was like

1869.764 - 1892.498 Ben Mandelker

that this is a big day this is a big day so it just popped into my head right now and i felt like if i didn't say it now there'd be no other time for me to say it that we are honoring the 30-year anniversary of sisters yeah we do have different algorithms because mine is like 30 years ago today pk's new girlfriend was born you know i'm just like always looking into like what pigs the guys are on bravo

Chapter 6: How does Daisy confront Mike about his behavior?

2468.658 - 2486.898 Ben Mandelker

what I was to say this, Mike does not need to insert himself here. I mean, this is his thing is that he inserts himself with everything, but like, this has nothing to do with you. Eddie lost Eddie, Eddie fucked this up. I'm sorry. I think that Eddie, Eddie ruined this entire thing with Jenna from right from the beginning. It was never going to last.

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2487.899 - 2498.53 Ben Mandelker

And Mike, you know, Ben has actually been pretty nice to Mike. Ben has really looked out for Mike. So he's also like, yes, he might be standing up for Eddie, but he's also fucking over his other ally, which has been, I think that's not cool.

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2499.151 - 2517.249 Ronnie Karam

Well, Eddie doesn't care about them. He's just getting back at Jenna because Jenna's, you know, he's fucking with Jenna, not Ben. I mean, he's fucking with them both, but his goal here is to fuck with Jenna. And, you know, for someone who's inserting himself so much, I think it's just projection because he's unable to insert himself in any other way.

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2518.19 - 2520.111 Ben Mandelker

In all facets of life.

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2520.132 - 2540.656 Ronnie Karam

Yeah, I've just got to insert myself when I can. And it's in other people's business because my penis isn't getting it. So now we go to Joao and Daisy in the crew mess, and she's now in peacock pajamas. It's a whole animal kingdom with Daisy tonight. And Joao's like, oh, you look very cute, by the way. What are those, Zimcock feathers?

2542.819 - 2562.748 Ben Mandelker

You're very sweet. Are you going to invite me to cuddle with you? He's like, oh, well, she's like, well, I'm a cheated woman. I've been scorned, but until I do find something serious, I'm fully open and willing to have some fun. And I'm curious. I don't know. Maybe he's a good great kisser. Like, let's go and find out. So Joao takes Daisy to his cabin. He's like, let's cuddle.

2563.349 - 2570.62 Ben Mandelker

It's like, ah, let's cuddle. Okay. Hold me like I'm a little shrimp that needs to go into a cocktail glass. Okay. I think I can do that.

2571.072 - 2589.165 Ronnie Karam

so now we see 3 26 a.m and it's very romantic they're in bed and joe's cuddling her and you just see daisy and she's like carry carry carry carry carry carry carry carry carry

2589.652 - 2621.323 Ben Mandelker

So then now it's 8.13 in the morning and Daisy is like, good morning. Did you sleep scared? He's like, I feel like little kids. It's like, well, I'm going to have to say something. Yeah, Ellie may get upset. So Daisy's like, oh, okay. So meanwhile, Ellie is just showering. She has no idea what's happening. And Ben walks in now. Daisy's left Joao's room, and now Ben has returned into Joao's room.

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