Pete Wicks On Male Loneliness "I Don't Feel Like I’m Enough”
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
Welcome to We're Talking. This Loneliness Awareness Week, we're joined by Pete Wicks to talk about the loneliness so many men carry. Pete opens up about being an outgoing loner and how losing his nan forced him to confront the pain he had spent years shutting down.
How does Pete Wicks describe his experience with loneliness?
You know, we're in a day and age, and I've heard you speak about this, write about this, where we are in a loneliness epidemic, in particular men. You know, in the research I was doing for this is you have 27% of men say they have no close friends. You have many men saying that they have no one that they feel as if they can turn to to support them.
What realization did Pete have about needing help?
And what's interesting is that you have those stats. Then you have Pete Wicks over here who has said that you were, what, an outgoing loner? Is that it? An outgoing loner. Mm-hmm.
How did the loss of Pete's grandmother impact him?
Yeah. But yet you still have the friendship circles. Yeah.
What affirmations does Paul share with Pete?
And that's critically important, I think, to our success and our mental health.
Yeah, massively. There's the Pete that is on TV, which is still Pete, and it's still me. I've always done everything as me, right, wrong, or whatever else. But then there's the very private me that my friends know and the people who know me not on a camera know. And that is... I mean, really the difference between those two people, despite the fact that they're kind of the same, is that the one that is off screen is soft as shit. But the impression that I gave across, well, I was, you know, pretty hard, miserable.
How does vulnerability relate to mental health for men?
It couldn't really affect me type thing because it became a lot easier for people to hate that person than it did for people to hate the kind of real me that was a bit more vulnerable. So the real Pete is vulnerable. Yeah. Yeah. Real peace vulnerable. You know, I wrote the book last year and that was kind of a cathartic experience for me, but it wasn't a self-help book and it wasn't giving advice to people because I don't know what I'm fucking talking about, but it's my experiences that are maybe relatable to people. And the amount of people that messaged me just saying it helped because someone else could explain how I feel. And all I did was explain how I feel.
What steps can men take to address their mental health?
I tried to put... Because I think that's the biggest problem with men is that we feel things, and it's not just men, it's not gender specific, but I think men probably struggle more with it, is that we feel things, but we don't really understand why we feel it or how we can look past that. So we tend to just bury stuff. We don't want to talk to anyone about it. We don't really want to do anything about it and just hope that it goes away. And when it doesn't go to the way, it becomes a fucking huge problem, right? Actually, if you dealt with it, you know, in bite-sized pieces, we may not have got to a point where, you know, male suicide rates in the UK are fucking astronomical, right?
Number one source of death for men under the age of 50, suicide.
And what a horrific and sad statistic that is. Number one is people taking their own life, right?
How can one honor a loved one's memory while healing?
That's not through disease. That's people taking their own life. And, you know, with my mum and everything else, it's a touchy subject for me. And I don't know what the answer to mental health is. I don't think, you know, a lot of people do because there isn't a one size fits all because we all think differently. We all feel differently. And mental health can be such a lonely place. Your head can become a prison. But there are so many different things out there. It's about finding the right thing for you. You know, people talk about therapy and that is amazing. Therapy has helped so many people that I know, but it doesn't always work for everyone, right? But there are other different things that you can look at.
And I think the one thing people need to do before they start working themselves is work out that they do need help and admit that they need help. And I never did that. I said, I'll do everything on my own. I'll do everything on my own. And when I lost my nan, I realized I needed help. And I still don't know what that is, but I've accepted the fact that I need something because otherwise,
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
0:00–0:30
2
How does Pete Wicks describe his experience with loneliness?
0:30–0:50
3
What realization did Pete have about needing help?
0:50–1:00
4
How did the loss of Pete's grandmother impact him?
1:00–1:04
5
What affirmations does Paul share with Pete?
1:04–1:38
6
How does vulnerability relate to mental health for men?
1:38–2:20
7
What steps can men take to address their mental health?
2:20–3:16
8
How can one honor a loved one's memory while healing?
3:16–22:08
Speakers
2 identifiedMore from We Need To Talk with Paul C. Brunson
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