Show notes
Retiring in Toulouse, France: Gay Life in the Pink City with Cameron BrayIn this episode, host Mark Goldstein sits down with Cameron Bray, an Australian-born, naturalized British citizen who has been living permanently in Toulouse, France for over ten years. Cameron arrived with a simple plan: stay three months, learn some French, and move on. That plan never quite worked out. He fell in love with the city, fell in love with a French partner, and never left. Now approaching 60, Cameron is a gay man who has built a full and thriving life in southwest France, founding his own international human resources consultancy and navigating French business life as a foreign entrepreneur. He hopes that by sharing his experience, he can inspire others to take that same leap.Note on currency: as of June 21, 2026, 1 Euro equals approximately $1.15 USD. All figures in this episode are from Cameron's personal experience and reflect conditions at the time of recording.What Is ToulouseToulouse is France's fourth largest metropolitan area and its fastest growing city, located in the southwest corner of the country near the Spanish border, roughly three hours northwest of Barcelona. Often called La Ville Rose, or the Pink City, the city earned its name from the distinctive long, thin red bricks used in its buildings throughout the region. In certain light, particularly at sunset, the bricks give the entire city a warm pink glow. The Garonne River runs through it. Views of the Pyrenees mountain range are visible from the city center.Cameron describes Toulouse as a "Goldilocks city": not too big, not too small. At roughly 1.2 million people in the metro area, it has enough energy, ambience, and cultural life to feel vibrant, without the overwhelming scale of a major global city. It is also France's biggest university town outside of Paris, which gives it a youthful, buzzing street energy that Cameron says he still pinches himself about after a decade.Why Cameron Chose ItCameron did not plan to stay. He came on the recommendation of friends who had a small apartment there, with a flight to check out the Alliance Francaise language school. He had been made redundant as an HR director in Brighton, had recently come out of a long relationship, and had the financial cushion and the freedom to try something different. What was meant to be a three-month adventure became a permanent life. He describes the move as one driven by gut instinct rather than analysis, noting that over-thinking it might have sent him straight back to the airport.LGBTQ+ LifeToulouse and France more broadly have a deeply laissez-faire attitude toward sexuality. Cameron says he has never experienced discrimination, abuse, or felt unsafe walking the streets of Toulouse or anywhere else in France as a gay man, including in the countryside. France was one of the first countries to decriminalize homosexuality, and same-sex civil partnerships and marriages have been legal for over twenty years, with the same rights as heterosexual partnerships.There is no defined gayborhood in Toulouse, and Cameron says that is very much a reflection of how accepted LGBTQ+ life is there: there is simply no need for one. Gay bars and venues exist, though Cameron notes, as in many cities around the world, the traditional scene has shifted with the rise of apps. Gay men and women live throughout the city and in the surrounding countryside. Cameron has friends, a gay couple, who live in a small rural village an hour and a half away and were welcomed by the mayor at the village festival with flowers and wine, the same as every other new resident.Daily Life and WalkabilityToulouse is highly walkable, and Cameron describes his immediate neighborhood as a textbook example of what some urban planners now call the 15-minute city. His bakery is in the building. His butcher, fruit and vegetable shop, wine shop, pharmacy, supermarket, and tram stop are all within a few hundred yards. A fresh market takes place nearby daily.Over the past decade, Toulouse has actively worked to remove cars from the historic city center, converting parking into bike lanes and creating shared pedestrian, cycling, and scooter spaces. The old city is a labyrinth of cobbled streets that was never really designed for cars in the first place. Cameron and his partner walk rather than drive and say they rarely take taxis anywhere within the city.Food and Cafe CultureFood culture in Toulouse is rural-based and deeply regional. The city is known for a few signature dishes: the saucisse de Toulouse, a thick, fatty sausage typically served with pureed potatoes; cassoulet, a hearty white bean stew with dark sausage and breadcrumbs that originated as farmhouse food; and anything involving duck, including confit and, yes, foie gras. Fresh markets are central to daily life, and most meals are cooked from scratch. Processed food is far less prevalent in supermarkets than in the US or Australia.Cameron describes the French relationship with food as one of appreciation rather than consumption. Meals are structured: breakfast, then nothing, then lunch, then nothing, then dinner. Portion sizes are smaller. People eat slowly, talk about what they are eating, and treat wine and food as part of the conversation rather than just fuel. The result, Cameron observes with some bemusement, is that Toulouse is full of people eating rich food in large quantities and yet very few are obese.The cafe culture in Toulouse is genuine. Coffee in the morning under plane trees, wine in the evening at a bar. The city is also France's largest university town outside of Paris, which means the streets stay lively, particularly on Thursday nights, which the locals call le petit weekend. Dinner tends to start around 7:30 to 8:00, preceded by a proper apero of charcuterie, cheese, bread, and wine that can last an hour or more on its own.LanguageCameron arrived expecting Toulouse to be less English-friendly than Paris or Bordeaux. He was wrong. Because Airbus, the aviation company, is headquartered in Toulouse, and because American firms like Pratt and Whitney and Rockwell Collins have a major presence there as well, English is widely spoken throughout the city. The European Space Agency is also based there. Signs at the airport and many local businesses operate bilingually. Cameron says that when he first arrived and tried his schoolboy French, shopkeepers would often just switch straight to English.That said, Cameron strongly recommends making a genuine effort with the language. The French appreciate the attempt, even if they complete the sentence for you. He adds that younger French people today are notably more fluent in English than the older generation, and that Toulouse in particular has an internationally-minded feel that makes it more accessible for non-French speakers than many French cities.Costs and HousingCameron owns a one-bedroom apartment in Toulouse with views of the Garonne River and the Pyrenees, a terrace, a garage, and a cellar. He paid 190,000 euros (approximately $218,500 USD) for it three years ago. His annual electricity bill runs around 400 euros (approximately $460 USD) for two people, in part because of favorable sun exposure in winter. His internet, phone, and basic television package runs approximately 40 euros a month (approximately $46 USD). His mobile phone plan costs around 15 euros a month (approximately $17 USD).Public transport within Toulouse is 2 euros per trip for the subway or bus, and free for seniors. Train travel across the region is one euro on the first Sunday of every month, a government initiative to help people with fewer means stay connected. All museums are free that same Sunday. Cameron describes France's socialist economic model as providing a genuine cushion: during the energy crisis triggered by the war in Ukraine, electricity prices in France rose only 4 percent while UK prices spiked 54 percent, because the French government owns its energy suppliers and capped price increases.French property culture is notably different from the Anglo world. Property here is bought to live in, not to flip. Prices rise slowly. Cameron says the expectation of making a fast profit on real estate simply does not exist in France the way it does in the US or Australia, and he sees that as a feature rather than a bug.HealthcareFrance operates a universal healthcare system. If you are sick, you will be seen and treated regardless of your ability to pay. Cameron describes five hospital visits for conjunctivitis earlier this year: he walked in, was treated, and walked out each time without a bill. Emergency and life-critical care is covered entirely by the state. Some medications require a small co-pay; others are free.Most residents supplement the public system with a mutuelle, a top-up private insurance that covers things like a private hospital room, dental, physiotherapy, and osteopathy. Cameron pays 60 euros a month (approximately $69 USD) for his mutuelle. He emphasizes this is not like American private health insurance: the mutuelle covers what the state does not, rather than replacing the state system entirely.For new arrivals, getting into the French health system takes patience. Cameron waited nine months to receive his health card. Bureaucracy is a real hurdle, and the administration does not make the process intuitive. However, once you are in the system, it is reliable. A colonoscopy consultation for Cameron's partner, who has a family history of colon cancer, was booked about four months out, which Cameron considers reasonable for a non-urgent specialist appointment. He notes...