Allison Holker
speaker
558 appearances
4 recordings
3 series
first heard Jan 2025
last heard Feb 2025
Allison Holker’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
And I've never let it. And my kids have been able to see that, that I have never said anything that I regret. I have never made accusations. I've never yelled at anyone that I shouldn't have, you know, tried to make accusations at. I've never let anything destroy who I am in my heart. And I still love living. I still love waking up every single day. I love being a mother.
I still love every experience that's happened to me, no matter how dark it was. That is my superpower. So it doesn't matter what people say about me to me anymore. I'm still standing because I know who I am and that's all that matters. And then when it came to my therapist,
It was at moments hard to have that belief in myself because so many people were attacking me on social media, in the public eye, family, friends, losing people, that I needed a little bit of extra encouragement from her to really stand on my own two feet. Because a lot of people mostly were coming to me with their own stories while I was on my healing journey.
They were coming to me with their stories and their grief, and it would be really emotional And she taught me that when people are saying things to you, you're a really strong-willed person, but it's still kind of keeping in there a little bit. She was like, be the mirror.
And visualize a mirror in front of you because all the naysayers, all the hate, all the words, all the questions coming in at you are people doubting themselves and putting it on you. So that also helps. But really, the superpower is believing so much in yourself and knowing and having integrity in who you are and self-worth that no one can drag you down.
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
To say those things.
It was a really helpful tool when my therapist taught me that because I then obviously went and taught my children that because they're dealing with just as much as I'm dealing with. Yes, I'm the adult in it, but this is their world of social media and they're going to grow up with it forever. So I wanted to make sure I shared that tool with them.
Specifically right now, my oldest, who's 16, Wesley's 16 and, you know, in the trenches of social media, but, you know, With social media, I used to tell my kids, ignore it. And I thought that was the best advice. But we all know, no one's – you read it. You read the comments. You read everything. You see what people are saying. So the mirror – Or some friend or relative tells you about it. Yes.
Did you see – So it's a helpful tool, but I'm going to take it one step further. So when my therapist taught me that tool, that it's a reflection of that person and their own insecurities. You're too big. You're too small. You're not pretty. You're too pretty. Whatever it is, it's always a reflection of how that person feels about their own insecurities.
But I'm going to take it one step further because what I now use as my tool for myself is is anything I say about someone else is a reflection of how I see myself. Because if I'm ever gonna be so hateful and terrible towards someone, it's because I'm feeling that way about myself. So you can also use it as a tool of reflection of what you say to someone or about someone. And who you wanna be.
And who you wanna be. So the mirror, the reflection is on both sides.
Yes, I can. So I am currently in a relationship with Adam Edmonds. And honestly, I'm so blessed that he's in my life. He's so beautiful. He's wonderful to me. He's great with my children. He's a support system. He makes me laugh. We share in such amazing conversation. He helps me explore the world, explore myself.
And we have conversations that really explore life and each other and take us to bounds and leaps and places I never thought I could go. And while also being really fun and lighthearted, it feels like on our relationship, everything feels easy. And of course it's not, there's a lot that we still have to work through and navigate and work out together.
But doing with someone that you love and sees you and hears you fully is just, it's something that I appreciate so much in him, in that we get to share in life and experience it together. And there's an outpouring of respect that we have. And we both have been through so much.
And I think when both parties have experienced loss or grief in your life, you just want to celebrate that person and lift them up every single day. And I feel like that's what we try to do. And we do that. And it's something that's so beautiful. I'm so happy that I gave myself permission in my life to have love and experience and freedom with someone.
And I am just so grateful that God brought him into my life. He's been so wonderful.
Yes. Oh, it was so perfect. Literally, the moment I met him, it was just out of this world and the connection is deep and so rooted. And it feels like we've been together in past lives. And we were always supposed to find each other and just reconnect and be together. And it needed the right moment in life for us to be able to accept each other.
and be there for each other fully at our full capacity and our full love, full availability. And it has been just magnificent and perfect. And it's interesting when you've gone through life in the way that we have, people get really scared to admit that. And I just want to yell it and scream it that I'm in love and it's beautiful. And I, and I love that my kids get to see it.
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