Angel Maldonado
speaker
38 appearances
1 recordings
1 series
first heard Nov 2024
last heard Nov 2024
Angel Maldonado’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
How we doing tonight, y'all? Ooh, yeah. All right, identify yourself. Who in this room thinks I'm straight? You know, show of hands, make a little noise, clap your hands. All right, some delayed reactions. That's the usual reaction that I get, actually. I don't know what it is about Texas ever since I moved here. I think all the steers, everybody just figures that I'm the queer.
I don't know what that's about. Either that or... The long hair combined with I'm so racially ambiguous that everybody also assumes that my sexuality is an ambiguous topic. I don't know what that is. I don't know. I think I'm onto something. The other day I had a comic tell me that I'd make a good prison wife. Yeah, his actual wording was, you would have the power of the pussy in prison, Angel.
And I said, wow, thank you. I appreciate that. Ah, true story. Anyway, that was my time.
I am loving life. I am so tired. I am so high.
I'm a door guy next door at Buckwild. I've been working all Halloween weekend. It's so fucked up. My sleep schedule is nocturnal right now. It's bad.
No, no. I work until the bars close. So what time is that? I left work at like 4 a.m. last night. So 8 to 4? Yeah. No, 6. 6 to 4. Yeah, 6 to like 4 a.m. And you stand there and you check IDs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's easy money. It's pretty fun. I'm not complaining.
I mean, I'm from New York originally, so I mean, people read my energy as complaining a lot. I don't know.
I don't want to bring this up, Tony. I don't want to bring this up.
Let's just say I'm un poquito garbage. Basura. Basura.
Better stay up and get high. I've had a very long weekend. Beautiful son of a bitch.
Try it out. There's a lot going on in this country, folks. Oh, God. All right.
I promise.
I've only lived in Austin for seven months, but I've been, I've wanted to do comedy since I was a little kid. I did, I was an improv kid. That's my, that's my comedy background.
The part about shocking.
Yeah, yeah, for many years. All right. Yes, and? Ah. Yes, and not a lot of pussy.
How you doing today? You look nice. My name's Angel. Like in the sky.
I'm an honest guy. I just stay quiet if I see a pretty girl. You know what I'm saying? When I start doing this, it doesn't work. There's a wall of garbage around here.
Oh, yeah. I'm a longboarder. I feel more natural. I've been living in Aspen for the last four years. Aspen?
I got an anxiety disorder. I shiver a lot. I feel more natural on a snowboard than I do walking on two feet.
Yeah, it's awesome. I just listen to music real loud and then I just ignore everybody that tries to yell at me.
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