Aya

I was thinking I was trying to be attractive to women, but then I really thought about being a lesbian, and I heard that vaginas are a little bit acidic, and...

I have too many paper cuts to dig in there.

But... I, um...

I do.

I want to fall in love.

I want to fall in love with someone, like a preferably Indian.

Because, I don't know, when you fall in love with someone, you really get to know how their mind works.

And Indian people always seem to have a really, really good song stuck in their head.

and I wanna know the lyrics, you know?

I wanna sing along.

No, okay, so when we were in New York, I was like, I was going out in the town and there was this lonely Uzbekistanian barber and I was like, oh, I'm gonna give him some business.

And so I did.

And I got, this cost me $60.

Is that like, I don't know, guys, like is this worth $60?

That might be.

In the middle of the haircut, he got a phone call from his girl.

And yeah, she was mad at him.

But I was like, dang, women.

And he was like, yeah, men need to learn to control their urges, like their sexual urges.

But women have this natural urge to be a bitch.