Craig Ferguson
speaker
270 appearances
4 recordings
3 series
first heard Jan 2025
last heard 13 Jun
Craig Ferguson’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
Trend
recordings per month · last 12 monthsRecordings per month over the last 12 months — 2 in all, peaking in Jun 2026 with 2.
Appearances
Uh...
Yeah, I agree.
No, no, but but I have a urologist.
I do. I do. I own multiple sets of binoculars.
I got this. I think this is going to work for me here. Hit me. I have a Ram 1500 Bighorn. 5.7 liter. Fuck you guys. Fuck you guys. That's amazing.
Well, the way I do it is this. The way I see the Ram is this. I'm very worried about the environment. Sure. So what I feel is to force big oil to make changes, I feel we've got to use it all up. There you go. Use it up. And that'll fucking make them pay attention.
The remote.
Not currently. Oh, well, no, I got some sparklers. I always keep some sparklers because my wife's cousin's kids come over and they like the sparklers.
Gotta be. Which house?
No, but the king size in the apartment, but a queen size at the house. Yeah. At the country home.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, we got to change it, though. Yeah, that's tough. Yeah, it's, you know, we've been married for a long time. If you need a couple bucks, let me know.
You've got to listen to me here about sleeping, because this is fucking important. Sleep is important to me. Of course. And during the pandemic, actually, during COVID, I was just ordering stuff online because there's nothing else to do. So I order a pair of shorty, short silk pajamas. Whoa. I'm telling you, man, I have taken every drug I've heard of. Fuck them all. Silk pajamas.
That's the way to go. Put down the Oxycontin and get some silk pajamas.
Talk about the duality of man. That would be like a speedball.
The first tattoo was actually late because my father hated tattoos. He thought that people should not have tattoos. So when my father died, I thought, what better way to remember a man who hated tattoos to get a tattoo? The Celtic paradox. So I got the family crest tattooed there.
The family name, something. So my father died, and then I didn't think about it for a while. And then about a few years later, my mom died. And I was very sad, obviously. And then a few months after my mama died, I started to kind of hear her in my head like, Oh, you got a tattoo for your father, but you don't get a tattoo for your mother. So I had to get my mother tattooed there.
But as I'm getting this tattoo of my mother's family on here, the guy who's giving me the ink says, you know, it's unlucky to have an even number of tattoos. I'm like, oh, I didn't know that. He said, so you better get a third. I'm like, oh, okay. And I'd recently become an American citizen. So I thought, well, give me this one here. Well, you got the snake. Yeah. Damn, dude. This guy's in it.
Yeah. So I have to, so I get through. And then after that, it's fucking crazy. But when I get, I don't know if, are you guys inked? Nothing, no. Right, so. I feel like a pussy. Yeah, no shit.
Fuck. You know, a few years ago, that would have been true. Now, if you've got ink, it probably means you're a fucking orthodontist or something. Yeah. But down here, that's the most hurty part of getting a tattoo I've ever had. Apparently, this is sore too, but I don't know. Yeah, here the ribs are bad. Okay. But this was very, very hurty. Don't do it.
Showing 221–240 of 270 · page 12 of 14
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