Dame Wilburn

But I feel like that word is too big.

OK, stay with me.

At the time, I had access to the charge account for campus security at the school bookstore.

And apparently, I had run up a charge of about $700.

Exactly.

So the admin informed me that I had two options.

You can quit your job, pay the money back.

Or we can fire you, you can pay the money back plus court costs, and you can go to jail.

The officer informed me that embezzlement has a 15-year jail time.

And I thought about it.

Now the reason I thought about it, much to the bemusement of the officer, was I was pretty sure the dragon was never gonna get her talons through those jail walls.

And I might actually be safer with the cops than I was at home.

But I also know I couldn't really go to jail and tell my fellow inmates that I had embezzled $700 worth of pizza flavored combos.

So I took option one.

Now, I find myself in another, you know, little problem, because as a campus security officer, I could stay on campus for the summer for free, but I don't have that job.

And I owe the bookstore $700.

And to stay on campus, I've gotta pay a grand.

Can't ask the dragon.

So this is where modified

Con number three comes in.