David Sedaris

No, you could see it. And I thought, what would I have done? So I would have bought the shorts. If you're that married to the pants, I would have completely washed them in the sink. It takes some work, but it's seersucker. You could get it done. If they had a hand dryer, you could go through all that and hand dry them and put them on again if you needed to.

But I wouldn't even feel confident to do that. I would have thrown the pants away or wrap the jacket around your waist.

But I wouldn't even feel confident to do that. I would have thrown the pants away or wrap the jacket around your waist.

But I wouldn't even feel confident to do that. I would have thrown the pants away or wrap the jacket around your waist.

I would have gone to the second person in line and I would have said, there's a woman back here who shitted her pants. Do you mind if she goes in front of you? And then when you led her up there, people would look at the back of her pants because they'd want to say, hey. Yeah. I was in life. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I probably would have judged her for wearing sweatpants outside the house.

I would have gone to the second person in line and I would have said, there's a woman back here who shitted her pants. Do you mind if she goes in front of you? And then when you led her up there, people would look at the back of her pants because they'd want to say, hey. Yeah. I was in life. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I probably would have judged her for wearing sweatpants outside the house.

I would have gone to the second person in line and I would have said, there's a woman back here who shitted her pants. Do you mind if she goes in front of you? And then when you led her up there, people would look at the back of her pants because they'd want to say, hey. Yeah. I was in life. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I probably would have judged her for wearing sweatpants outside the house.

The shit in the back of it would just be secondary.

The shit in the back of it would just be secondary.

The shit in the back of it would just be secondary.

Yeah, of course.

Yeah, of course.

Yeah, of course.

Oh, she's great at it.

Oh, she's great at it.

Oh, she's great at it.

It's Instagram curated.

It's Instagram curated.

It's Instagram curated.

It's really her point of view. You could not get her to put something on there that she doesn't think is funny.