Dr. Joshua Coleman

speaker
727 appearances 3 recordings 2 series first heard May 2026 last heard 9 Jul

Dr. Joshua Coleman’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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Recordings per month over the last 12 months — 3 in all, peaking in May 2026 with 2.

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Good Life Project · Healing Family Estrangement: What To Say, And What Never to Say. · 9 Jul 2026 podcast
So, yeah, the subjective state of the person who's accusing the other of being hurtful or abusive is important because it's, you know, even if objectively somebody doesn't seem like they're being abusive, the person who's saying they felt abused or harmed is.
says that, then the person who wants that relationship with them has to be interested in understanding how they arrive there.
They're never going to prove them wrong, right?
So they have to be, that's why empathy and understanding and curiosity are so important as features of
of healing, because the more that they can really deepen their understanding and show curiosity and interest, the more the person's going to say, okay, well, you really, you care about me.
Otherwise, proving somebody wrong feels like an act of uncaring.
Both can be it can be true that it's that it is a sort of a line that gets crossed or precipitating incident.
And it can also be true that it's just sort of a slow erosion in the relationship or some other outside factor.
You know, so, for example, if, you know, let's say dad yelled at his son's wife or something, that might be the final step.
straw for the for the center it might be such an egregious act if the sun just cuts them cuts them off or you know people who um didn't like trump rejecting the parent because they voted for trump i have a lot of those people in my a lot of those parents in my my practice um
So those can be in some ways of what a researcher Carl Pillemer calls a volcanic act, something that just where there's a big explosion or a big fight.
But that isn't the only there's there's often more sort of slow erosions or can be kind of a death by a thousand cuts.
Let's say it's a.
Parent who's critical, isn't very aware of their being critical in an ongoing way or insensitive about it.
And where the adult child just feels like, I've had enough.
I can't tolerate being around you anymore.
And I just need to have the space.
Yeah.
Yeah, no, that's absolutely right.
And that's why people who are estranged over politics, and it's usually the adult child cutting off the parent, I tell the parent, widen your lens.
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