Dr. Nicholas Epley

speaker

1,223 appearances 1 recordings 1 series first heard Jul 2026 last heard 15 Jul

Dr. Nicholas Epley’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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recordings per month · last 12 months

Recordings per month over the last 12 months — 1 in all, peaking in Jul 2026 with 1.

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The Liz Moody Podcast · The One Habit That Will Instantly Make You More Likeable · 15 Jul 2026 podcast

You'd probably feel a little better if you chose to engage than if you held back.

Now, that doesn't always mean you choose to engage.

I had to write a book, right?

I got other things to do.

But it suggests that we're miscalibrated in how we think about the payoffs for reaching out versus holding back.

And then that would probably change how you chose to behave sometimes.

But it doesn't mean you should be doing it all the time, right?

But it does suggest that, yes, if you'd like to improve your social life, you can.

Even introverts, too, would be a little happier if they reached out a little more often.

I think that's a really, really good way to think about it.

That is a limit you're putting on yourself that you should just check.

We find in our research over and over again,

That there are lots of psychological barriers that pop up in people's minds that keep us from reaching out and engaging with other people, fears about how other people respond, beliefs about yourself that might keep you from reaching out and engaging when you could, right?

Our data don't suggest that you should be reaching out all the time, but it does suggest that maybe you want to test some of those flags.

Test some of those barriers, right?

Those bars that are keeping you from reaching out.

What we find in our research when we do this in our experiments, we find that those bars aren't quite as strong as you think they are.

They're often mistaken.

They're more like pasta noodles, wet ones even.

And when we test them, rather than taking them as given, I'm an introvert.

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