Dr. Pamela Kreiser
speaker
938 appearances
3 recordings
1 series
first heard Jul 2026
last heard 11 Aug
Dr. Pamela Kreiser’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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recordings per month · last 12 monthsRecordings per month over the last 12 months — 3 in all, peaking in Jul 2026 with 2.
Appearances
If you do things that are just ignoring or hiding or delaying or denying, all those things are going to not add up to not doing the work. So that kind of lands us on even a bigger question, which is what are the relationships you want to keep? And then thinking through what are the conversations that need to have, what is the maintenance so that the engine light doesn't come on? Because that's sort of what we're really saying. Because I don't think the engine light just comes on
If we do maintenance, I think it comes on when we aren't. And we could look at all of the, you know, the four horsemen, the contempt, the stonewalling defensiveness, right? Criticism. We could look at all of those and say, if we're not doing maintenance in those, each of those areas, then we are risking that light to be coming on the dashboard.
And then further would be to just drive down the highway and pretend the dashboard's not lit up, which is low-key kind of what I do. I just take the car home and take a different car. I was going to say that should be something that you look at if you're in a dating relationship. You're like, wow, this person doesn't engage in certain conversations regularly.
I think so. I mean, you want to build towards it, but I also think that you can use metacommunication as a strategy. So remember, metacommunication is where we have communication about the communication. And we can say something like, Meredith, one of these days, I want to sit down and talk about money with you. And then maybe I follow it up a little bit later and say, when are you able to have that conversation with me, do you think? Hmm.
It's not mean. It's not attacking. It's just saying when would be a good time to do that. Now, if you're on the receiving end of that and you go, never in your mind, I will never be talking to you about that. I think that's a red flag. Yeah. For you and for the other person.
I think there's small things that we were probably going to let go anyway.
So if you did a bad apology, I might just be like more stupid.
So the message received is the one that counts.
Okay, so here's a major pet peeve of mine.
When people give crappy apologies.
Yeah.
Don't you hate it?
Yes.
You know, like, I'm sorry you're feeling this way.
Oh yeah.
You already know.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
No, I don't actually.
No, I don't.
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