Dr Tony Bates

speaker

338 appearances 1 recordings 1 series first heard Jul 2026 last heard 12 Jul

Dr Tony Bates’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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recordings per month · last 12 months

Recordings per month over the last 12 months — 1 in all, peaking in Jul 2026 with 1.

Appearances

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Brendan O'Connor · “Crying shows us what really matters to us” - The Power of Crying with Dr Tony Bates · 12 Jul 2026 podcast

kind of rule of thumb in psychology is that if I use the first person and stick with the first person, I do better.

So if I say, Brendan, I'm feeling angry with you, I feel all worked up inside, rather than, Brendan, you making me angry, which is accusing you.

And so if you can just speak for what is true for you...

And be honest.

And if it's hard, I'm afraid to say this.

I'm afraid you'll really not like it.

I'm afraid I could lose you if I say this.

But I'm just feeling, and I might be irrational.

I'm feeling it anyway.

I'm feeling angry and hurt and worked up.

And I just want to say it because if I don't, it just gets locked into my muscles and my body.

And I just feel, I feel all confused.

You know, it's hard, but be honest about how hard it is and be mindful and then ask them, how is that?

And is that OK?

Check in.

OK.

You haven't left somebody feeling overly responsible for the way you're feeling.

I think what we need to realise first is that there is something within all of us, something very deep, that wants to grow, that wants to heal, that wants to get on with life.

I think everybody I've met in my life, every...

patient, every client, everybody, that no matter how bad they were, and some of them were pretty awful, there was something in them that was seeking to kind of grow.

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