Elizabeth Shaw
speaker
1,154 appearances
11 recordings
1 series
first heard Nov 2016
last heard Sep 2021
Elizabeth Shaw’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
To the person who's desiring, you dress that up.
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And that's why I think being clear, not brutal, but just clear is really important, even if you have to do it twice.
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If you're persistent, I guess you have to really ask yourself, what is it about letting this person go that's so unbearable?
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Yeah, yeah, or for some reason, you know, I can't bear it or I couldn't face the devastation of it.
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And that's not a safe place
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it's such a tangled thing to say because what does it mean, my way of dealing with the rejection?
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I mean, does it mean it was so devastating?
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Does it mean you thought, you know, harm will fall on you?
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Like, what does it mean that you even wanted to get them back in whatever way?
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And is it true you're getting them back?
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Are they long gone or are they still in your friend group?
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And I guess too, if you're sleeping with someone, that other person has feelings, you know, and are you doing the right thing by them to sort of act in this way?
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So I think that's a very...
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complicated thing I mean I guess I guess the thing is that somehow we have to be able to manage the rejection without setting up a trail of rejection like dominoes that whatever has happened to us we somehow incorporate into our own behavior because you know when you're hurt you know what it's like to struggle and so to force that onto somebody else there really isn't any excuse for doing it
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trauma as
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as possible.
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In the last example about the worst kisser, that's one where it's hard to say it's important to be honest because one person's bad kisser is not another person's bad kisser.
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So again, you've got to think of the self-esteem thing.
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If something that bothers you, you have to say to yourself, can I really hand on heart say that this is feedback this person needs because if they don't know, they'll blunder through life.
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that's an example of no, you don't need to be, because you're not the arbiter of kissing.
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Showing 1001–1020 of 1,154 · page 51 of 58
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