Esther Perel

speaker
288 appearances 2 recordings 1 series first heard Jun 2019 last heard Dec 2021

Esther Perel’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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That's the thing that I think is often missing in the hookup thing is it's not enough to have just a bunch of body parts connect.
You want something that allows you to leave and think, ha, I will remember that date.
And maybe I'll even use it for fantasy 20 years from now, you know, but it has to have a story.
Sex comes with a plot.
Any type of plot, but it needs a plot.
If it is too skin deep and it's too thin, then you have nothing to hang it on.
There is no meaning attached to it.
There is no experience that attaches itself to it.
And then it can feel rather vapid.
I think that that's the problem that we often experience when people describe the dating or the hookup.
You just say, are you enjoying it?
Are you having fun with this?
You have all that freedom.
You have all these possibilities.
Do you feel good when you come home at night?
Or do you feel like you just want to forget it, that you want to be so freaking drunk that you don't remember it the next morning, so you don't even know what you did?
That doesn't say anything positive, neither about sex, nor about relationship, nor about your degree of
That's right.
The story is what gives it a meaning.
And the meaning is what gives it a sense to the experience.
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