Gavin de Becker

Luckily, it's down now.

You've got to be kidding.

You're running a machine.

It has nothing to do with humanity.

And government agencies have nothing to do with humanity.

They have to do with process, bureaucracy.

Yes.

Yes.

For me, and I think it's true for everybody, contribution to others is a key part of coming to believe that you belong here.

Those of us who had a tough time, and remember I said everybody has a tough time in some way through childhood.

Self-love is often missing or is hard to come by.

And to believe that you belong here, contribution to others is a key thing.

And the second one, you asked for one, but you're getting two.

So it's a special today, a bargain.

The second one was the hardest lesson for me to come to believe.

And that was that what is right for you is always right for the other person.

Very hard for me to get my head around this one because I thought, well, wait a minute.

I want to break up with this girl who wants to get married and have kids with me.

How can my breaking up be right for the other person?

Well, A, she gets to be with somebody who actually wants to be with her.