Gemma Speig

speaker

1,085 appearances 3 recordings 1 series first heard Feb 2026 last heard 7 May

Gemma Speig’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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recordings per month · last 12 months

Recordings per month over the last 12 months — 3 in all, peaking in May 2026 with 2.

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The Psychology of your 20s · 413. You're not for everyone? GOOD! · 4 May 2026 podcast

It's a name we've mentioned on the podcast before.

It's called the spotlight effect.

Essentially, our mind believes there is this big giant light shining down on everything that we're doing.

Everything that we are doing wrong, everything that we're doing right, every flaw.

We can't help but overvalue our role in other people's lives and think of ourselves as more significant.

We imagine, again, this spotlight following us around everywhere, bringing attention to everything we'd rather conceal.

The reason being, the reason why we have this effect is that because we are the main character, right?

In our own lives, the universe revolves around us.

And therefore, when we attempt to slip into the minds of others to evaluate how they're seeing us, we think they must be seeing us as we see ourselves, which is at the center of everything.

all our flaws laid out, all of our mistakes clear to everyone as they are to us.

We give them the sight that we have over ourselves.

And this obviously creates a weird panic.

Researchers have found and have examined that the spotlight effect is one of the main things that

triggers obsessive self-monitoring and self-policing as a reaction to this heightened sense of insecurity that everybody must know the big secrets about us and everybody must be thinking about us.

The other thing that researchers reveal is that the spotlight effect

again, is actually real only for us.

Nobody is thinking about you that much.

There have been so many studies that show, I think it's like 90% of people's daily thoughts are about themselves.

And yet rationally, we can't see through that.

Let's talk about what we lose when we try to be for everyone.

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