Ian Bagg

speaker
620 appearances 4 recordings 2 series first heard Nov 2024 last heard 17 Apr

Ian Bagg’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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recordings per month · last 12 months
1 · Apr OctJan 26AprJulnow

Recordings per month over the last 12 months — 1 in all, peaking in Apr 2026 with 1.

Appearances

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So you're probably wondering the same thing everybody keeps asking me.
Where the mom at?
And that's a fair question.
And I love telling people the honest God truth because there's nothing fucking fun here.
See, when my son was two weeks old, my baby mama, that bitch took off with a midget.
That's not a punchline.
This bitch actually took off with a midget.
And to this day, I don't know what pisses me off more.
The fact that she took off with a midget or the fact that a midget was wearing cargo shorts.
You ever seen an emo midget wearing cargo shorts?
That shit will hurt your pride as a man.
I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
Honestly, he looked like he was coming down on his shortcomings though, for real.
But look, on some serious shit though, my son, he's 11 years old and knows half the periodic table and the first 22 digits of pi.
Not to pat myself on the shoulder, but I don't think I did too bad for a guy who failed the retarded class every year, right?
And look, this bitch had the nerves to call me back up after about a week, talking about the midget was throwing beer cans at her and fucking hitting her with cans and shit.
I was like, bitch, that sounds like a short relationship.
Y'all, that's been my time.
Y'all have a blessed night.
Wow.
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