James Sexton

The illusion of control is so important.

Because there's so much out of our control, the world is terrifying.

And if you've realized how out of control so many things are, and bombs just fall out of the sky, I think you would realize, yeah, there's not much you can do.

You don't have that much control.

But I think marriage gives us the sense that, oh, no, I'm going to do this, and then this is safe.

It'll be safe.

And it's an illusion.

And I think it can be a harmful illusion because you think that this ring is gonna replace preventative maintenance and staying connected.

And so if you said to someone, why didn't you stay connected?

Why didn't you do these little things?

Most of the time, the answer would be,

I didn't know until we were, like I didn't know I was getting lost until I was lost.

Like if I'd known I was getting lost, I would have stopped driving and figured out I'm lost.

Like by the time I realized where I was, I had no idea.

Like falling feels like flying for a little while.

And then you hit the ground.

So it's like, oh, this feels good.

This feels good.

This is all right.

I'm good.