Jessamyn
speaker
169 appearances
3 recordings
1 series
first heard Nov 2024
last heard Feb 2025
Jessamyn’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
Yeah. Yeah.
Well, it's only been three years. I may need a little more time. No, I mean, I knew I was going on a date with a dating coach.
I just, I didn't a hundred percent know what it meant. And I don't think I did any, like, I didn't do the super sleuth deep dive internet search on you. I don't think, I don't remember doing any of that simply because it was like, it just isn't like instinct for me. I know it's instinct for a lot of people.
right so yeah pro tip make sure you know what's out there on you about you on the internet uh before you for sure go out there um but i just i i didn't want to have any expectations because that just didn't feel fair i i assume there might be some like Like, you know, little games or lines.
I had my eye out for some dating judo moves. But I don't remember feeling like, oh, this is forced. Or, oh, this is like a move that he uses. It didn't feel, nothing felt inorganic. It just felt like I was going on a date with a good guy.
Uh, not this argument. Do we, do we need to explain? Quick backstory.
It was definitely a match. I think with the league specifically, it's not a particularly detailed profile, right? It was kind of like you put a few of your interests, you put like a tagline, your age. And I think that was kind of it. But I think, you know, with being profiles that might be a little more detailed, you do kind of run the risk of there being like a greater room for error.
But yeah, I mean, it was definitely what I've expected. I didn't feel like I was being catfished.
Yes. The middle school history teacher that I was expecting to meet on the date was definitely there. Having drinks.
So romantic.
Yeah. I mean, honestly, kind of sort of same. I had no interest really in like diving into a relationship, especially coming out of a year and a half long relationship. period of isolation. Um, and I, I was careful. I was a little guarded. I think it wasn't guarded about like how my feelings or anything like that. But I was like, you know, am I just like jumping into this?
Am I just excited about this? Because I've been socially restricting myself for 18 months or like, is this real? Cause I had never, you were my first serious boyfriend. Like I just, I had been living in New York city for, for 10 years ish at that point. And it's, you know, New York city dating scene, say what you will about it.
It's fun, but it's also hard to take seriously sometimes because there's so many people and it's just very easy to kind of jump to person to person. So kind of the same of what you said, I was like, this will be, I'll at least come out of it with an anecdote that I went on a date with a dating coach that I met on a dating app at the very least. Um, but it is obviously a lot more than that.
I think, you know, it's hard out there. Saying like there's some sort of answer to find that perfect balance between being chatty but not too chatty or like being too quiet, you know. I think it's easy for anybody, guys.
girls whatever to fall into the trap of like feeling like you're on an interview yeah you know you you want to ask questions but you don't want to just ask questions that are like that have like a single answer the typical like how many siblings do you have Do you have any pets? Whatever.
Whatever questions you have, I don't know if it's good to necessarily be scripted, but make sure they're ones that maybe three things or topics that you have in mind that you know are going to generate a conversation between the two of you, no matter what her interests are, no matter what her strengths are, what she does for a living.
Just things that you have on tap, ready to go, that you know will generate conversation. And if they don't generate conversation, then maybe that's a signal.
Yeah, I like that.
Yeah. I mean, very straightforward. Um, yeah, I think, I think families, it's not always easy for people to talk about their families.
So you can always, you know, if you're asking her like about her parents or siblings, you know, if there's not a lot coming back, it's probably, they may not be super close or maybe tension there or whatever the case. There's always other, you talk about friends, talk about coworkers. I'm sure I talked about like my coworkers and bosses a little bit too. Yeah. Yeah.
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