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Jordan Klepper

👤 Speaker
See mentions of this person in podcasts
2941 total appearances

Appearances Over Time

Podcast Appearances

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

sneezing pandas falling down.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

You know China.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

You've got problems.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

Check this out.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

First of all, why would you pay for condoms?

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

Just go outside.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

They're on the ground.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

But like, ha ha, China, you've got falling birth rates.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

And I know, I know you're gonna say, hey, Americans, don't you also have falling birth rates?

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

Yeah, but we find ways to embrace them.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

Like becoming Disney adults, okay?

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

It's like, we don't need kids, we are kids.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

Also, who does this condom tax target exactly?

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

Someone's like, I wanna have sex, but I'm a cheapskate, so I guess I'll just have a baby?

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

Like, if China really wants to put condoms out of reach, they should put them on the top shelf.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

Actually, yeah, no, no.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

Really, though, their overall health has improved, so they are getting taller.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

You know what else they're getting?

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

Lonelier.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Bondi Spins Out Over Epstein Questions & Olympian Confesses Affair on Live TV  | Andrew Jarecki

Okay, wait, so first of all, this is a paid app?