Kezia Noble
speaker
154 appearances
2 recordings
1 series
first heard Nov 2024
last heard May 2025
Kezia Noble’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
And if she's investing, it means that she's trying to impress you on some level. So it's very much pattern breaking is not just about asking an interesting question. It's about your interesting responses. So we could take a very, you know, two things that are always going to come up in conversation is where are you from and what do you do?
So we know that those two questions are going to come up, and I'm not telling anyone that they shouldn't be asking those questions. But it's very easy for those questions to end up in a boring conversation. So let's say, like, most of my students work in IT. The first thing will be, like, what do you do? He says IT. And she will just give a very polite answer.
unimaginative response which is like oh you know do you like it and most of the time the guy will go yeah it's okay or it's all right you know and that's it that's already the conversation's gone but if he turned around and just said you know what i love it and i hate it Immediately, she's curious because people don't answer like that. It's an unusual answer.
It's not a weird, crazy, you know, fucked up answer. We don't want those. It's just a little bit unusual and it's going to just reel her in, her curiosity. Oh, what do you mean? Like, what do you love and hate about it? And then from there, the guy can start talking about things which have nothing to do with his job.
You know, I love it because I get to do A, B and C and that's a reflection then of something that's positive about him. But I hate it because this is what I really want to do. This is what I'm super passionate about. So we're already taking it from IT, which no one really wants to talk about, to this fun, interesting information, this high value data about myself.
Why did you hate it? You see it immediately. I want to know. Why did you hate it?
Yeah, it is unfiltered. And that's very important because women want to have that very authentic, unfiltered conversation with a man. And it just shows that he's just, that's his truth and he's unapologetic for it.
I think it's important. OK, so I do show guys how to bring their more appealing qualities forward and some of the less appealing qualities like keep them in the back burner. But that's more things such as not like personal achievements and things. Maybe they haven't achieved a lot in their life. Maybe they're still living at home with their parents.
I don't say to them that you've got to cover that. It's more that you've got, because that's you, that's your reality, that's the position you're in. It's how you communicate it. So if you do anything with shame or embarrassment... then that's going to translate as I'm an ashamed person, I'm embarrassed, I'm not happy. And all these, these are the things that women don't find attractive in a man.
But if you said, for instance, yeah, I don't really have a very good job, but I've chosen that because... I don't want to be on the rat race like everybody else. I look at everybody else every day, getting on the train, stuck in a little office. No way, not for me. Now, she might think, again, on paper, yeah, well, that guy going in on the train every day, he's, you know, he's got drive.
He's going somewhere and you're just slobbing about. Sure, sure, she might think that. However, she will not think that you're ashamed or that you are trying to sort of like, get in her good books, tell her what she wants to hear. So you have that pride and that can work.
That can work more than the guy who's doing all the right stuff, but he's deeply unhappy and he's insecure and all the rest of the stuff. It's better to have both of those things. But if you aren't, I don't say to guys, oh, pretend you've got a fancy job. just tell, like I sit down with them and go, why are you doing this dead end job? Why? Like, what's the reason for it?
And a lot of the time they come up with a pretty good reason, which is I don't want to be a slave to work. I said, well, that's beautiful. That's interesting. That's wow. Okay. So you're a bit of like one of those kinds of guys. Okay. Sell it. Let's do it. You know, don't be ashamed of it. So that's the way that I try and get them to be authentic and
Yeah, and it's very important to always tap into the woman's emotional buying motives rather than her rational buying motives. So again, yes, as you said, speaking with emotional language works better with women. For them, lust and attraction is not rational at all. It's purely emotional. So yeah, I agree. Just tap into the emotional narrative.
So looks, a good looking guy has to do less at the beginning, way less than a less good looking guy. Just a caveat, though. A lot of good-looking guys doesn't mean that it's going to be every woman's type. Suddenly, I've seen some men, and the women are just, oh, he's so good-looking. I'm like, I don't know what I'm looking at here. Have I missed something?
So that does happen, just to put that little caveat in. But let's just take the average, very good-looking guy that appeals to most women. He has to do so much less, and he will get away with so much more. I'm sorry to say that, guys. That's the truth. However, he doesn't have the same length of time to make a mistake like a beautiful woman has.
Okay, he has maybe five, ten, let's just say five minutes he has to ride on his looks, ride that wave. A beautiful woman can ride on that wave for months. and just be a total bitch and not have anything interesting to say because men are much more governed by how a woman looks.
So yes, it's important, but I don't want men to internalize this and see it from their point of view as, oh, but a beautiful woman, you know, can get away with everything. Yeah, not a beautiful man. So looks are important, but what's more important and how the man makes her feel. I met a man recently, I swear, not my type at all. I wouldn't even say he's good looking, let alone like not my type.
And I'm thinking about him now. He's got a little bit stuck in my head. And that's what happens with women. You get in their heads, you know, and it's an emotional feeling because male desire and female desire just operate completely differently, completely differently. And so that's something I teach, obviously, to understand how female desire works.
See, I get into a man's head. I get these young guys, and they, like, ask me out. And then, you know, during the day, I realize they've all got this thing in common, which is they've all got a crush on Jennifer Aniston. Like, oh, we're here again, are we? It's like, yeah, and not when she's in Friends. How she is now, like, oh, I'm like, oh, great.
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