Michael Smith

Hey, this is Michael Smith.

I'm using my real name because there's so many of us.

I can still stay anonymous.

Anyway, when my son was about 18 months old, I was watching a football game and I get really into my football games.

I haven't been a coach.

And

He comes running in and hands me a little cherry tomato.

He goes, here, daddy, got you a cherry tomato.

He hands it to me.

I eat it.

And he keeps running back and forth with tomato after tomato.

After about 20 of these, he says, here, daddy, cleaned you another one.

And suddenly the word cleaned stuck out to me.

So I got up out of my chair, followed him down the hall, past the kitchen.

Into the bathroom.

And here he is with the box of tomatoes, the lid up on the toilet seat, the scrub brush in one hand, tomato in another.

And he's dipping the brush in the water and scrubbing the little tomato with it.

And he looks up at me with the biggest smile and he says, here, daddy cleaned you another one.

Needless to say, I don't eat cherry tomatoes anymore.