Phil Smith
speaker
64 appearances
2 recordings
2 series
first heard May 2025
last heard 30 Jan
Phil Smith’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
Trend
recordings per month · last 12 monthsRecordings per month over the last 12 months — 1 in all, peaking in Jan 2026 with 1.
Appearances
But I'm going to have to play more poker. I mean, I can't just pay the $1,000, have $200. I had to buy in for $1,200, turn it into like $3,600. And then I go, oh, I'm chilling. And then maybe lose that in between.
It's a whole thing.
I purposely talk about the fact, like, I need this. And then people are like, then he's not bluffing. Right. This is his rent money.
I delivered pizzas for ten years. I'm pretty good at that. Wow. Okay.
Done.
I hope I get to him before they do.
Need that two grand.
Yeah.
I really have a girl.
I can get into this. Dish the dirt. Yeah, let's do it. So she's a new girlfriend. I met her at Creek in the Cave. We were there for Banana Phone. Creek in the Cave. I do want to let you guys know there's a free show every Sunday called Banana Phone if you're in town for Kill Tony. Let's not plug your shows on your girlfriend's back. Thank you, Phil.
I was there for that, and I met her, and I thought she was really hot. She is really hot. She's way out of my league. And we just started small talking. It was going great. I bought her a drink. And it got to the point where we sat, watched the show. I walked her to her car, and she goes, just so you know, I'm married. Okay, and then what?
And then I was like, all right, well, I'm totally mature enough to be in a platonic relationship with a woman who's married.
No, no, no, that's what I thought at the time.
Platonic.
Yeah, so, like, I thought we could, like, catch an earthquake together or something. Yeah. She could not use my material against me. I'll speed it up a little bit. No, you're doing good. Keep going. She was going to mics by herself and stuff. Her husband didn't support her doing comedy. Wasn't a fan of you either. He didn't let her watch Kill Tony. He didn't let her watch Kill Tony?
That's just what I heard. I don't need to give this guy more of a reason to murder me, so we're not going to talk too much about him. No, keep going. This is great. So I'm going to Mike's with her as a friend, as a platonic friend. And I'm really like in my head, like, damn, I've matured so much. She's so hot and I can just be her friend. And we're going to all the Mike's.
We're going to all the Mike's. And eventually she just ghosts me. And I'm like, oh, did I like weird her out or something? And so I texted her, didn't get a text back. And then a few days goes by and I'm like, I'll send her one more. And she says, I was like, hey, did you like quit comedy or something? And she says, no, I'm going through some personal stuff.
Turns out the personal stuff was she told her husband that she has feelings for me. And then they started the divorce process.
Again, real mature of me, I waited, because we're in Texas, so you really can't fuck around.
Did she? Not really. So, like, everybody's, like, telling me the same thing. Like, well, if she left her husband to be with, what do you think she's going to do? But as soon as she realized she had feelings for me, she stopped talking to me, worked it out with him, and then filed for divorce. And then we didn't hook up until it was finalized.
Showing 41–60 of 64 · page 3 of 4
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