Ross W. Greene
speaker
289 appearances
1 recordings
1 series
first heard Jun 2024
last heard Jun 2024
Ross W. Greene’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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I think that at around the age of two, and I said this in the film, two very interesting forces come together.
Number one, us caregivers for whatever reason start to become obsessed with compliance the minute the kid turns two.
And they, the kids, who have always known what they wanted, basically from the minute they pop out,
Some interesting skills kick in for them to permit them to go for it.
Locomotion and language.
So now two interesting forces are coming together, a kid who can now go for it, and caregivers who've decided that compliance is their number one priority, which, as I said in the film, is probably why we call it the terrible twos.
Why would we not continue being responsive to the hand we've been dealt and meeting kids where they're at, from age zero to forever?
That's of course the big question.
Because the kid is now going for it, I think caregivers feel a loss of a sense of control.
I would argue.
You aren't in control from the word go and thinking you are is delusional.
This kid was somebody the minute they popped out.
This is not a blank slate.
So the goal of parenting, once again, is to be responsive to the hand you've been dealt.
The best you can shoot for, and I talked about this in Raising Human Beings, is influence.
You are the kid's partner.
The more you shoot for control, the less control you end up having.
So I think it's a bit of a feeling that you've lost control.
you know, when they're an infant, they can't do anything.
They just lay there, right?
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